Butterfly

 

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Chapter 1: The Caterpillar

~Caterpillar:  "Who...are...you?"

  Alice:  "Why, I hardly know, sir.  I've changed so much since this morning, you see...?"

  Caterpillar:  "No, I do not C, explain yourself."

  Alice: " I'm afraid I can't explain myself, you see, because I'm not myself, you know."

  Caterpillar: " I do not know."

  Alice:  "I can't put it any more clearly, sir, because it isn't clear to me."

 
  Alice in Wonderland, (1951)         Lewis Carroll                                                   
 

                     ~Black velvet and that little boy's smile~

As Nora pulled into the parking space, she checked her watch.  Twenty minutes early, good, (89)that would give her time to find a seat and settle her nerves.  What was she doing?  Apparantly, a forty-something female wears a sign around her neck that says, "I'm desperate".  Men answered her call of desperation with,  "I am married, but would like something on the side." "I am a sexual deviant."  Or the ever popular, "I am mentally unstable, but, live a fairly normal life with the help of a cabinet full of antidepressants." She was easy prey. Why did she continue to open herself up to this?  She could have just continued to play along with the role of suburban housewife?  She played it for twenty-three years.  It was comfortable and safe, and unbearably lonely.  A last check in the rear view mirror,  a touch of lipstick, then she headed for the door,

 Dominic asked her for ID.  It was a little pretense they went through every time she came (244)here.  "All by yourself again tonight, Nora?"  She was supposed to say, that's because I (259)came to see you, then he would smile. At least, that is how it had worked for the last (278)several weeks.  He was probably still in his early thirties. She also imagined him as married (294)with a house full of kids. Their entire relationship existed in the confines of those two(310) sentences.  She liked this place.  It was small and the food was good.  She loved (325)listening to the younger people sing Karoake.  Nora never participated, though. "Im actually (338)meeting someone this time Dom, I have a date."  "He better be a gentleman, or he will be(356) dealing with me." "I am counting on that," she laughed.  She took one of the bar stools that went in a semicircle around the stage and placed her purse on the empty stool beside(390) her.  From here she would have a good view of the stage and of the front door. (407)

 Sam walked through the door about ten minutes later.   They made eye contact immediately, (421)and he crossed the room toward her. "Nora?" he asked. "Yes, and you must be Sam," she(438) said, as she removed her purse from the empty stool. "Whew, that could have been (453)embarrassing," he said, flashing her a devilish smile.  He was of average height, but (467)solid, muscular.  This was a working man. When he took the bar stool next to her, (483)Nora noticed his wavy hair, a sandy blonde ending just above his shirt collar, and his crystal (500)blue eyes. He was clean shaven and smelled of leather and something else.  Was it (513)lime?  "Have you been here long?" he asked as he draped his jacket over the back of his (531)seat.  "Just a few minutes.  I was earlyI hope you didn't have trouble finding the place." she (549)added. "No, I had seen the signs before.  I work just down the highway, " he said as he(567) signaled the waitress and sat down. "What are you having?" he asked, looking toward (580)Nora's half empty glass.  "Its just soda.  I don't drink very often." She said. "I will have (597)the same", he told the waitress.  "If I drink, she might try to take advantage of me." When(615) he  smiled, she noticed little lines around the edges of his eyes.  The conversations (629)around her seemed to quiet.  There was an attractive young woman taking the stage.  "She(644) looks a little like my oldest daughter., Jennifer.  I have heard her sing before.  She is (660)very good," Nora said.  "You have a daughter her age?"  "Yes, or very nearly.  She is a(677) college student.  I also have one in high school, Arabella. "  He reached into his pocket (692)and pulled out a photograph of an adorable child in a party dress.  "This is the love of(710) my life, Sarah Michelle.  She's four," he said.  The waitress returned with his soda.  She(725) placed his glass on the table, and standing between them with her back to Nora, took (741)the picture from his hand.  "She is so cute.  She looks like her Daddy," she said, handing(758) it back.  "If you need anything else, anything at all, my name is Wendy."    " Thanks, (773)Wendy, this is Nora, I'm Sam.  I think my date could use a refill, then we may want to(792) order something to eat.  Could you bring us a menu?" he asked. "She's right, you know. (808) Your daughter  is adorable.  The resemblance is remarkable." she said.  "Yeah, no (820)getting around it, she is all mine." he beamed.   The young woman on the stage (835)sang something lusty and low.  Then her stance changed and volume increased as she went(850) into the chorus.853

 "Black velvet in his little boy smile.  Black velvet and that slow southern style.  A new religion that will bring you to your knees.  Black velvet if you please ."882

  Was it a prayer or a warning?  The man, the song, the smell of whiskey and smoke in the air(902),  were all working together to cast a strange spell over her.  She felt an  attraction, but it (919)was something more.  He didn't look at her so much as  into her, as if he were trying to (938)read her soul. A chill went through her, suddenly, and she rubbed the goosebumps on (953)her arms.  The young girl had finished her song.  Several people clapped in (966)appreciation.  An older man stepped on stage.  "Does your daughter live near here?  Are you (981)able to see her often?"asked Nora. "I spend as much time with her as I can.  I was (1000)working as a mover, so my evenings were free.  I would go and tuck her in bed at night, read(1020) her a story. I'm going to miss that.  Now, I'm starting a new job making car (1036)windshields.  It's an evening shift job, but, no weekends. I will be able to see her then."Sam (1054)replied.(1055)  

He seemed a devoted father, but honestly, she was mesmerized watching his lips move.  He moved in to close the space between them.  He reached up to move a strand of hair away from her face, but, his fingers lingered there, tracing the outside of her ear. His hands were rough, a working man.(1109)

Shattering glass was the sound that broke the spell.  Dominic, the bouncer yelled, "Nora, (1123)duck!," as he lept across the stage and right over her head.  Sam pulled her against him,(1140) as she spun around on her stool.  She had been completely oblivious to the escalating (1155)argument at the table behind her, but the bouncer hadn't missed it.  By the time she(1171) turned around,this mountain of a man  had  pinned a  smaller man, wearing a (1185)motorcycle jacket,  to the floor.  Dominic  had one knee on the guy's neck, and the other (1201)immobilized the arm holding the broken beer bottle. After releaving him of the bottle, Dom yanked the guy to his feet and physically escorted him from the building.(1229).

Dominic came back to where Nora was seated and taking a hard look at the man beside her,(1247) asked, "Nora, are you alright?"  "Yes, what happened?" she asked.  "I was keeping my (1261)eye on this guy", he said, looking at Sam, when I saw that jackass behind you lift the (1279)bottle.   I'm sorry I didn't get to him before he broke the glass.  Don't step down here till(1297) we get this mess cleaned up.  Also, I'm gonna have Wendy bring you another soda."(1312)   The manager appeared then to assess the situation. He escorted the other two (1325)people at the table to the door.  He comped their check and asked that they  please not (1342) return.  As he signaled for a busboy to sweep up the broken glass, he slapped(1357) Dominic on the back and turned to Nora, saying, "My apologies, ma'am. (1368)

"So, you know the bouncer, huh?"Sam asked. "Not really.  I know his name.  He says hi (1385)sometimes when I come in." she said.  "Uh huh, seems like he takes a special interest in you,"(1403) he said, eyes gleaming.  "I've always been in here alone. Dominic just makes sure(1417) no one bothers me.  That's why I had you meet me here.  If you had turned out to be a (1437)creep, he would have smashed in your nose a little," now she was smiling.  "Better to be(1454) his freind than his enemy, I'm thinking.  That is a big dude!  He reminds me of my(1471) navy buddy, Moose.  We fought our way out of a few bars in the Phillipines" he (1487)laughed. "No one messed with Moose a second time, I can tell ya that!"  "I haven't ever seen(1505) anything like that happen in here before." she said.  "Guess they don't mess with Dom(1520) a second time, either." They both laughed.   "How long were you in the service?" she(1535) asked.  The music had stopped, and the lights were turned up while the staff cleaned (1550)up the remaining glass.  "I went in right after high school, and I served for 8 years.  I (1568)was aboard the U.S.S. Kittyhawk when she launched first strike against Saddam (1579)Hussein." "That must have been very exciting!" said Nora.  "I could tell you some stories, but,(1595) make sure you want to hear them.  I wasn't an angel and I won't lie to you."said Sam.  (1614)

A short while later, as Sam walked Nora to her car, he couldn't help but notice she had (1632)parked beneath the security light and camera.  She saw where he was looking, and laughed,(1647) "A girl can't be too careful." she said.  "If I kiss you, is your buddy Dominic going to(1665) come running out here to kick my ass?" he said smiling.  "I don't know, he might" she(1682) said.  "I'll risk it," he said as he grabbed her and pulling her against him, then pushing(1699) her up against the car, gave her a long, deep kiss. With one hand he kept her pressed (1717)tight, with the other he ran his hand over the side of her breast.  As he gently caressed, (1735)he teased her nipple with his thumb until it got hard in response.  "I just wanted to give(1753) you something to think about.  I will call you tomorrow."  Then he said (1766)goodnight.  The car must have known its way home, because sitting in front of her house a few minutes later, she could not remember her short drive home.  She touched her lips and smiled.(1800)

 

 

 

 

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Chapter two: Caterpillars and crocodiles

~~ (1800)
How doth the little crocodile improve his shiny tail, and pour the waters of the Nile on every golden scale.  How cheerfully he seems to grin, how neatly spreads his claws.  And welcomes little fishes in with gently smiling jaws.~  Caterpillar, Alice in Wonderland (1951) Lewis Carroll.(1846)

 

 

 
 
 

 

 

The house was quiet when Nora  arrived home.  Her daughter was spending the night with a girlfriend. William,(1864) her cat, was the ever vigilant sentinel  in his spot by the front window.   He was the man in her life.   The day(1887) she went to the shelter looking for a fluffy kitten, she hadn't expected to come home with a full grown Tom (1907)cat.  Walking past the rows of cages, Nora had been drawn to him.  He had rubbed his nose against the bars(1928) of the cage until it was raw and bleeding, just trying to get some human contact.  This touched something(1947) deep inside her heart, a kindred spirit. She had no idea how he had come to be in the shelter, but, she knew(1970) he was coming home with her.  The shelter workers had named him William. Somehow, it  suited him.(1987)Norah picked him up and cuddled him to her chest.  "Don't worry.  No one can ever take your place."  She fell asleep listening to the sound of his purring.(2016)

It was still dark outside when the sound of the phone woke her.  Afraid it might be her daughter, she ran to (2038)answer.  It was a number she didn't recognize.  She picked up to hear a male voice, barely above a whisper,  "Come(2059) and meet me for breakfast," he said. "Who is this calling to seduce me with food?"  She asked, knowing full (2079)well the identity of the caller."Pancakes, bacon, coffee," he whispered.  Then he began to laugh, and she(2097) joined in. "No one should be this cheerful at, what time is it anyway?"  "Six o'clock, come on sleepyhead.  I'm at Denny's.  Don't make me eat alone." Hair in a ponytail, scribbled note to daughter and  ten minutes later she was in her car and on her way.(2145)

Nora  pulled in to the parking lot, to see him leaning into his truck, changing his shirt.  Had he slept there?    He (2167)waved and walked over. "I didn't expect to hear from you quite this soon," she said.  "Is that a bad thing?" he (2189)asked.  "No, just unexpected," she said. Sam gave her a hug and a kiss on the forehead.  He whispered into(2209) her ear, "Don't analyze everything, please."  Then released her and held out his hand, and she took it.   "I (2228)don't know about you, but I am starving.  Let's go eat, then you can tell me how you dreamed about me last (2250)night." he said.  "Oh Lord, I am not ready for this,  You are impossible." Nora said.  "I am improbable, but not(2271) impossible," he said, flashing her a million dollar smile.(2280)

Inside they were seated in a booth near the front. They sipped orange juice while discussing the menu choices.(2299)  After placing their orders , they made a game of people watching.  It was still very early, so, the restaurant(2318) was not yet busy.  Looking around the room, they identified the usual cast of characters.  The young lovers(2236) were at a booth in the back. They sat on the same side of the table, whispering.  At the counter was the aging(2259) beauty queen, a cup of coffee in one hand, cigarette in the other.  She looked tired and her sequined dress(2279) spoke of the club she had patronized the night before.  The booth behind had comb over guy.  He was busy (2299)shuffling and reshuffling paperwork preparing for a business meeting.  The booth in front was a small (2315)family, mother, father, child.  The little boy was peeking over the back of his booth every few minutes and (2334)grinning. Through the door walked an elderly couple.  He was tall and well dressed in his suit coat and sweater (2354)vest.  Fedora, bow tie and wing tipped shoes spoke of a bygone era. Even though his posture was somewhat (2373)stooped, he towered over his wife.  She came to barely above his waist in her navy blue dress and matching(2393) jacket with pearls.  Her hat, purse and shoes were purple.  She had her arm draped comfortably through his,(2411) as if it had always been there.    Nora was saddened, thinking that it would not be long before one of them (2432)would arrive alone. .(2435)

"What about you   What should I know about you?"  Nora asked. She smiled, rather weakly.  She was still thinking(2454) about the wonderful elderly couple and wondering if she would still be alone at that age.  Her previous (2472)marriage had turned into an empty shell, two people living separate lives under the same roof.  It was not(2491) ideal, but would have been preferable to the loneliness of brief encounters she would later regret. "You (2508)already know that I'm a dad.  I was married before.  I work making windshields.  I don't smoke, drink only (2527)rarely,  I am a Christian and I have served my country for eight years in the Navy." said Sam.  "I got all that(2550) from your profile.  Tell me what isn't there.  Tell me your secrets.." she said.  "I'm also ruggedly handsome, (2568)hilariously funny, and I have a great butt." he said with a huge grin.  "He does, too, I noticed it when he came (2591)in." said the waitress, winking, and placing their food on the table.  "Everything look ok?" she said.  Sam(2609) had ordered the lumberjack meal and Nora ordered an omelet.  "It all looks fine" ,he replied, turning his (2627)attention back to Nora.  "What else would you like to know?" he said, leaning back in his seat.  There(2646) was still a smile on his face, but the smile had left his eyes.  The atmosphere had changed from friendly banter to (2668)something more serious.  Why was he defensive? Was she pushing?  It may have been her imagination, but(2685), Nora felt a need to lighten the mood.  "At the risk of sounding like too much of a St. Louisan, where did you(2707) go to high school?" she said, jokingly.  "I went to Pacific High School. I was on the football team." he (2727)said. "Jock, huh?  Quarterback and Prom King, high school royalty?"she asked.  "Not exactly.  I was from the work (2746)farm, an outsider, but I did date a preacher's daughter.  I taught her the meaning of life underneath the (2765)bleachers," he said laughing . "Ok, I really want to find out more about the preacher's daughter, but, you lived on a (2786)work farm?  Why?" she asked.  "It's a very long story, but, the bottom line is my parents died.  I was an angry(2808) teenager.  None of my relatives were willing or able to take me in.  I was sent to Missouri Baptist Children's(2828) Home, but, I continued to get into trouble and they sent me to the work farm."    "Oh, I'm sorry.  I can't even (2850)imagine  losing one of my parents." she said."How did they die?"  " My dad died when I was five.  He was (2871)working on a scaffolding on a building downtown, when there was an accident, and he fell to his death.  My(2891) mom and I heard about it when a breaking news story came on in the middle of my cartoons..  I wasn't  old (2913)enough to understand what was going on. Mom cried. That was the first time I ever saw her do that." Sam (2934)was very quiet for the next few minutes.  " My mother died when I was twelve.  She had cancer"  ."I'm sorry.(2954)  I'm asking way too many questions." she said.  "I don't mind that.  I will tell you anything you want to(2974) know, but, your eggs are getting cold,"  he said.They finished their meal in silence, occasionally she would get (2993)caught watching him. She saw both the confident man and the scared child.  When the check came, he picked(3012) it up and looked it over.  "Look, I would like to see you again.  I want you to be able to ask me anything.  I (3037)want you to be comfortable, but I'm also afraid you will turn and run.  I'm a good man, but, I have lived a (3060)rough life.  I won't lie to you about that.  Can you give me time, or have I completely scared you away?" he(3082) asked, looking suddenly very serious.  "I'm still here," she smiled.(3092)

"Ok, your turn." Sam said."Who is this lovely woman, sitting in front of me?" She took a deep breath. "Well, I got(3115) married right after high school.  I was married for 23 years. I had some medical problems and for the most part he was very supportive,  but he treated me like his patient, not his wife.  I (3151)got well, and he couldn't deal with it. I guess he liked me being dependent on him. The stronger I got, the(3173) farther apart we got.  He has filed for divorce and moved  to Kansas City to be with his girlfriend.  The girls miss him and (3197)take it out on me. Jen lives in a residence hall on campus .  I never see her and she never calls.  She spends school vacations with my parents.   Arabella is(3227) 14 and at home with me. She hates everyone but I am usually her most convenient target . It really just never (3248)occurred to me that he would move away and leave them. The divorce is hitting them so hard.  They thought our family was (3271)something special.  They would see their friends parents split up, but somehow believed we were immune to that.  The day we separated(3293) we stole something sacred from our children.  Arabella went from being this sweet little blue eyed blonde, to Bella, with her black(3315) hair, black nails, black clothes and black  goth makeup.   I have two cats and my daughter has two dogs. We also seem to have(3341)acquired a tall, redheaded teenage boy. I am a terrible housekeeper but a better than average cook.  I don't smoke and seldom drink. (3364) As for religion, I am one of those bible thumping pentecostals.  My small church family keeps me sane, and I am in fact related to most of them.   I (3393)paint and sculpt, and I am a fairly decent photographer.  My parents are both alive and well.  They live close by in a house they have had since I was nine years old.  I have one brother, and he and his family live less than a mile away.  We aren't a perfect (3479)family, but we are a close one." said Nora.  "You forgot to mention your beautiful eyes, and luscious mouth"  he (3499)said as she became flushed and nervous.  "You really do need to learn to take a compliment.  I have never(3554) seen anyone blush so easily.  I think I am gonna call you my girly girlfriend."  Sam paid the check and (3574)walked Nora to her car.  "When can I see you again?" he asked.  "Oh, I meant to tell you, since you mentioned the (3597)children's home, Strawberry Festival is the day after tomorrow.  I'm sure you must remember those. I mean,(3614) if your memories of that place are not too bad.  My family goes every year." she said.  "I always meant to go (3636)back and visit.  Can we go together?" he asked. "Call me."she said.  I'm going to be a gentleman because its (3657)broad daylight he said, giving her a gentle kiss.  HIs hand rubbed across her bottom, and lingered briefly.  "I could get used to this," he whispered.  She drove home, feeling like a schoolgirl again..(3691)

 

 

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Chapter Three: Strawberry Festival

"Let me take you down, cause I'm going to...Strawberry Fields."

The Beatles

 

 

 

 

(369( The phone rang at 8 a.m. on Saturday morning.  A few minutes later, he was pulling into the driveway.(3709)   Arabella had spent the night with a girlfreind and they were going to the mall.  One more day with no questions to (3731)answer.  Talking to her daughter about dating was still very awkward.  (3742)

The drive to the festival was not long, but Sam knew she was too quiet.  "Whatcha thinkin?" he asked.  "Oh, just(3763) wondering if you are really ready to meet my family." she said.  "Oh, that's right, you said your parents (3782)attend this." he said.  "Not just my parents.  Also, my aunt, cousins, ya just never know.  "I'm sure it will be(3803) worse for you than for me.  I'm looking forward to seeing the place again."  he said.(3818)       

Pulling in to a parking space, they got out of his truck and walked toward the center of the campus.  There was a (3841)music tent  gospel choirs, several craft tents, a few rides for the little kids, a puppet show, and lots of food.  In(3863) the middle of the complex was an alumni tent.  They had a table with several photo albums.  Sam was very (3883)pleasantly surprised to find a couple of pictures of himself taken during his residence. Nora's favorite was a picture of him in a canoe.  He was such a cute kid.  That day he had a smile from ear to ear.  They also ran into a counselor who had been there all those years ago and remembered him well.(3941)

It was a beautiful, sunny day and Nora could not remember ever feeling so at ease with a man.  She held his hand (3964)as they strolled the campus, and for the first time in a very long time, just let go, relaxed and enjoyed herself. (3986) They browsed through a craft tent where Nora bought a ragdoll.   Passing a residence hall, Sam climbed the(4004) steps, saying, " this is where I lived!"  Taking a seat in a glider swing on the porch, he pulled Nora down to(4026) sit beside him.  They sat and rocked back and forth in the swing while Sam seemed to be trying to catch a (4048)memory.  It was so pretty here.  She imagined it normally a quiet place as well.  Today was anything but (4067)quiet.  "I  know you came to live here under the worst possible circumstances, but, it couldnt  have been all (4086)bad could it?"  "No, the counselors were great.  I made a lot of freinds.  I got saved here!."   "That is (4106)wonderful.  Was your mother not a believer?" she asked.  "I think she was in her own way.  She tried to go without(4128) cursing for two weeks.  It was a self-imposed penance for something she felt she couldnt get forgiven for.(4147)  Looking back, I feel like she knew she didn't have long left.  Of course, being the rotten kids we were, we (4168)didn't do anything to help her.  If anything, we were worse than ever.  She had made it about a week and a (4190)half, but it had been an effort.  Then, my sister Virginia got caught sneaking food upstairs to a boy she had (4211)had hidden in her closet for over a week.  My mother threw him out and pulled that girl down the stairs by (4233)her hair, screaming every cuss word she had swallowed.  Once she got her downstairs, she beat her with coat(4252) hanger until Virginia had welts and Mom was exhausted.  Then, her expression just went blank.  She sat on (4270)the couch, and I wondered if she was breathing for a while.  Her eyes were wide open and she stared out into(4292) space.  Next thing I knew, she was crying, Virginia was crying, and I started to cry, too.  That was the second(4313) time I saw Mom cry." "I believe God knew what was in her heart.  If she wanted to be forgiven, and asked, it(4336) was done.  Jesus paid in full for our sins, " Nora said, taking Sam's hand.  "I know that, now.  That is when I(4358) got saved.  I had grown up with a God that was all about wrath and punishment, and came here to find out (4380)about love and forgiveness."  Then, looking all around, he said, "I do love this place.  I would like to visit the(4401) sanctuary later if its open."  (4406)

They sat in the swing for a while longer, watching the people stroll by and being taunted by the smell of meat (4428)grilling.  Nora's stomach was growling.   "Would you like me to give you a guided tour of the house?"  "The(4447) girls who live here now might feel a bit like they are being invaded." she said.  "As a kid living here, did you(4470) enjoy the festival?" she asked.  "Oh yeah, me and the other guys would follow pretty girls around and try to(4490) get phone numbers," he said. Nora punched him in the arm.  "Oh, so that was you!" she said, laughing.  "I'm(4510) sure I would have gotten your phone number." he said. "Probably  a kiss or two, too."  " I seriously doubt it.(4530)  First, as devastatingly handsome as you are now,  I was a couple years older than you, and second, my (4549)Daddy wouldn't have let you get anywhere near me." she said, laughing.  "When do your parents (4565)usually get here?" he asked.  "Oh, I am sure they are already here, somewhere.  Mom would have wanted to come(4585) early for the quilt auction.  She never actually buys one, but she likes to see them, and the prices they go for." (4607)said Nora. "Are you starting to get nervous about running into them?" she asked. "Not a (4623)chance.  Parents love me!"   Her stomach growled loud enough this time for him to hear it.  "I think we may need to(4645) get you something to eat. Can't have them thinking I am not taking good care of their little girl.  Will it be (4667)porksteak, hamburger, hotdog or brat?"  he asked.  "Hamburger for me", she said.   Sam ordered three(4682) hotdogs, one hamburger, two bags of chips and sodas, and they carried their lunch to some empty seats at a table(4703) inside a white gazebo.  While they ate Sam entertained her with stories of pranks and mischief that he and (4722)some of the other boys had gotten into.  Then, standing, he walked over to one of the supports of the gazebo. (4743) "It's still here," he said.  "What is?" Nora asked.  "Come here.  Feel this." he said as he took her hand and (4764)glided it over the wood.  "Can you feel the indentation?" he asked.  "Yes, and?" "I got really angry one day (4784)and tried to put my fist through that beam.  I (4794)was fifteen.  Shattered most of the bones in my hand, they had to wire em back together." he said. "Not my smartest(4816) move," he said as he held out his hand for her closer inspection. Most certainly, you could feel the misshapen bones(4837) under the skin. Nora ran her fingers over the top of his hand trying to imagine what pain he had been in. "What on (4861)Earth could have made you so mad?" she asked, shocked. "I was in love with a girl in one of the cabins.  She wasn't (4885)here for anything more than being a teenager.  Her parent's sent her here because she didn't fit into their perfect lives,(4906) in their sprawling mansion..  I thought she was perfect, though.  She was my first love.  One day,her parents came(4926) and took her away.  I heard a rumor that it was because she was pregnant.  I went a little crazy, I guess.  After I got (4951)out of the hospital ,I was sent to the work farm.  I never did find out if the rumors were true. I never saw or talked to(4978) her again.  I could have another kid out there somewhere." Nora hugged him.  "I'm so sorry," she said.(4996)"Ok, while I have you feeling sorry for me, I should probably tell you, I could have also left one or two behind in the Phillipines."(5022) he smirked, then gave her a quick kiss. "You sailors are all alike!, A girl in every port,"she said, displaying(5043) a very unconvincing pout. Throwing her paper plate in the trash, she stepped down from the gazebo.  "Time for (5062)strawberries!  Last one there pays!" she yelled over her shoulder as she took off  toward the concessionaire (5079)dishing out the strawberries and ice cream.  When she arrived, he was already there and leaning against a post with his (5100) arms crossed across his chest. He was trying to look as if he had won easily, but the sweat on his brow and rapid(5124) breathing gave him away.  "Ok, sailor, you won this one, fair and square.  This one is on me." she said.  She pulled out her (5146)wallet and paid for two heaping plates.  (5153)Handing him one, they walked toward  some benches in front of a puppet stage.  Children had started to gather (5173)for the next show.  Strawberries, ice cream, a sunny day, colorful puppets and children's laughter, it was very(5191) near perfect.  When the show was over and their trash discarded, they walked hand in hand across the (5209)grounds to the swings.  Sitting on swings next to each other, Nora turned to Sam.  "Penny for your thoughts,"(5228) she said.  "I was just wishing Sara was here with us.  She would love this!  I am going to bring her next(5249) year," he said.  "You know, you look really cute, sitting in that swing with your dolly," he laughed.  Nora had all but forgotten she was even holding it.  "Yeah, I guess I do!" she smiled.(5284)She could almost see the wheels turning inside his head, as a big smile formed on his lips. "So, Daddy was the overprotective type, huh?  When did a boy finally get past him?" he asked. "That would (5321)have been a tall, teenage ranchhand that worked for my uncle.  His name was Alan Johnson, but everyone called (5339)him Little Man."  "Daddy couldn't have been happy about that.  What happened?" he asked.  (5353)"Nothing did happen, really. We went to the Bootheel Rodeo, another family tradition.  My aunt and uncle were members of a horseclub that would ride in  with State and American flags, to start the rodeo.  They asked my dad if I could ride(5395) with them. He was a little concerned that my riding skills were not up to the challenge, but, my aunt assured him that it would be an easy ride.  He consented and Mom and Dad went to find seats in the bleachers, and I went with my aunt and uncle to(5446) unload the horses.  Trying my best to stay out of the way, I wandered around a bit. I saw my uncle's horse tied (5469)up in the inside coral.  He was a beautiful black stallion named Esquire.  I was patting him on the(5488) nose and talking to him, when this boy I had ever met came up to me.  He said, "Little lady, I can take you for a ride on him if you want."  I looked him square in the eye, and told him that Esquire was(5532) my uncle's horse and I was allowed to ride him anytime I wanted.  He pushed his cowboy(5549) hat back and laughed.  I think he knew I wasn't exactly telling the truth.  Esquire was a little too(5568) spirited for an inexperienced rider.  Anyway, about that time my aunt and uncle came in.  My aunt (5585)was leading an old quarter horse named Pearl.  She was to be my mount for the grand entry. My(5604) uncle made introductions, and laughed a little.  Seemed him and Little man could communicate (5618)without speaking.   I rode next to my aunt, and Little Man rode next to my uncle.  We trotted around(5637) the ring with everyone watching.  I felt very important.  When we got back to the coral, I was told to(5657) go find my parents while they put the horses back into the trailer.  My aunt and uncle joined us in a(5678) few minutes, but I didn't see Alan again until we were ready to go home.  My parents had left in their car, and I was going to ride home with my aunt and uncle.  A beat up pickup pulled up beside, an(5719)d it was Little Man.  He rolled down his window and asked my uncle if I could ride back with him.  (5739)My uncle said he guessed that would be alright.  I got into his truck.  Everyone had cb radios back(5758) then.  As soon as we hit the main road, he and my uncle were on the cb teasing me.  My uncle said he could see a red glow coming from the truck.  Alan said, yeah, that is Nora blushing.  He said, I was(5801) sitting so far up against the door, he was afraid I might fall out.  We stopped and got a soda, and(5822) then we went back to my uncles and exercised the horses a bit.  Then, he drove me to my (5841)grandmother's house, where my parents were and let me out." Sam was trying hard not to laugh.  "So, he(5860) never even got a kiss?" he asked. "Nope" she answered.  "And you father was alright with all this? "(5877) he asked.  "I never said that" she laughed.  "Daddy was fit to be tied when my aunt showed up(5896) without me, and as he put it, left me to run around the countryside with a randy teenage boy."(5915)Sam couldn't hold it in any (5921)longer.  He laughed till his sides hurt.  When he finally stopped, he said," I think that is the most you (5941)have talked since we met." "And if you are gonna laugh at me, I guess it will be the last time."she said.  "Oh, don't (5966)get mad.  I was only laughing, 'cause if I had met you way back then, you would not have remained so (5987)pure." "Don't be too sure about that, either.  That cowboy left a lasting impression on me, whether he got a kiss or(6009) not." she said.  "Didn't you ever see him again?" he asked.  "Yes, actually, I did, one more time.  He didn't (6029)work for my uncle anymore, but when we went to the rodeo the next year, I did see him in the stands.  He (6052)was with a girl, who even my aunt agreed looked an awful lot like me.  I like to think I made some kind of an (6077)impression on him as well." she said. "You didn't even talk to him?" he said.  "I didn't need to.  He saw me.  (6099)He tipped his hat back.  I got a sour look from the girl he was with."she said.  "I don't get it." "I guess boys (6124)and girls see things differently, but, to me it was just kind of perfect.  I was still only fourteen.  Daddy (6144)wouldn't have let him near me, and if Alan had tried, there would have been a big scene, ugly memory.  He let me (6167)know he remembered me. I like to think fondly. So, he got to stay my first crush, wonderful memory."she (6187)said.  "Or, he could have been pushing his hat back to wipe the sweat off his brow.  His girlfriend could have just thought he was looking at another girl, when he may not have even seen you.  As for the girlfriend looking like you, he has a type, that's all." he said.  "Wow, you are a killjoy!" she said, standing up and walking away.  He was laughing, but followed her.  "Aw c'mon, I was just pulling your chain." She smiled back at him to let him know it was alright.  They walked toward a tent where a choir was assembling.  As they entered the tent, she saw a couple of very  familiar faces,  looking her way.  "Dang, we have been spotted.  I hope you are ready.  Here we go!" Sam took hold of her hand.  "I'm gonna need you to hold my hand," he said, teasing.(6332)

Walking over to the table her family occupied, Nora's father was the first to speak.  "We wondered where you were today.  Have you been her long?"he asked.  "Most of the day, yeah." she said. "Did you get something to eat?" he asked.  "Yeah, way too much," she said, putting a hand over her stomach. "And who is this you have with you?" asked her mother.  "Mom, Dad, this is Sam.  He actually spent several years living here as a child.  He has been showing me around, from a slightly different perspective.  Sam, this is my Mom and Dad, Mr. and Mrs. Crader." she said.  Her father stood up and held out his hand to Sam, "Bob and Marylou is fine.  Have a seat,  visit for awhile?" (6458)


 "Where do you live, now, Sam?" asked her mother.  "I share an apartment with another man, in Maplewood.  I just started a new job in O'Fallon, though, so I will be looking for something out that direction in the near future."  "Nora said (6500)you spent some time here.?" "Yes, Ma am,  my mother had passed away."  "Oh, that is so sad.  Was she the only family that you had then?"  No, actually, I had an aunt and uncle as well.  My older sister and I were first sent to live with them, but, they had seven children of their own.  Social services stepped in, and removed me from their home.  My sister went to live with a boyfriend."  "Are they still living?" she continued.  "Yes, ma am.  They also live in Maplewood."  "Ok, momma, leave the boy alone.  I want to know what is really(6600) important.  Have you done any time in the military, son?" he asked.  "Oh, yes sir.  I spent eight years in the Navy.  Went in right after high school.  I was stationed in San Diego, then Hawaii.  I also served aboard the U.S.S. Kittyhawk.  I was aboard when she launched first strike against Sadam."  he said.  "Eight years, I guess you saw a lot of the world." he said.  "Join the Navy, see the world, sir". he laughed. "Good, good, I believe every man worth his salt has spent some time in the military". her father said.  Just then, the sound system(6700) crackled, signaling that the choir was about to perform.  Saved by the bell, was all Nora could think.

When the choir took its first break, Sam asked, "What branch of the military did you serve, sir?"  "I was in the Army, primarily at Fort Bragg, North Carolina.  PFC working in the post office.  I used to get so homesick, I didn't know what to do.  Sometimes I would travel all day and night on a bus, just to get to spend a few hours with my family before getting back on the bus to make the return trip.  Never served(6800) overseas, but my two older brothers did. Three of MaryLou's brothers as well.  Fortunately, everyone came home safely."

Nora's mother touched her husband's hand, which was their private signal for him to be quiet.  She asked, "Do you have any children, Sam?"  "Yes, ma am, I have a four year old daughter, Sarah"  He pulled her picture out to show them.  "She sure looks a lot like you, doesn't she?" she said.  "Yes, maam."

When the sound system crackled, coming back to life, Nora stood up and made their excuses.  "Guess we will see ya'll later.  I think I would(6900) like to get something else to drink, and I still have a couple of craft tents to look through."  Sam followed her out.  "That wasn't so bad.  I don't know what you were so worried about." he said.  "Uh huh, you got off easy, but my phone will be ringing as soon as I get home." she laughed.

They grabbed a couple of sodas from the nearest vendor and walked the grounds for awhile.  He pointed out several of the surrounding buildings and told her what they were used for. "That is where I had sex for the first time"(7000) he said.  "Yes, I know, with the girl who may or may not have been pregnant.  "Uh, yeah, about that, she was not the first." he said.  "What? You were fourteen!" she said, incredulously.  "Yeah, I was a little horndog.  That building is where the pregnant girls lived.  I thought, pregnant, easy. I wasn't wrong." he said, laughing.  That got him a punch on the shoulder.  "Ow!"  They both laughed. When they passed the sanctuary, he said, "I would like to go in for a couple minutes."  Sitting down on the steps, she said, "Go ahead.   I will just sit here and finish my soda."(7085)
 When he returned he had a serious look on his face.  As he sat down(7100) next to her, he asked, "You have internet, right?"  she nodded. " Is it possible to find someone's gravesite on it?"  "Well, I know there are some grave finder services.  They are basically people who go to cemetaries and making a list of the names and dates.  They post them online." she said.  "What if there is no marker?" he asked.  "Who are we talking about?" she asked.  "My mother, she is in an unmarked pauper's grave because there was no life insurance, or anyone to pay for a real funeral.  I want to find her, and put at least a(7200) flat monument on it.  What do you think that would cost?" he asked.  "I think that is very sweet.  I would love to help you find it.  Let me see what I can find online, and maybe Monday morning, we could make some phone calls.  There has to be a way to find her." she said. "You would be willing to help me?" he asked.  He teared up, "You are a very special woman." he said. "Oh, yeah, lol, I'm a saint" she laughed.

He took her hand and pulled her up off the step.  They walked to the truck.  (7300)

 

 

 

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Chapter Four: Arabella

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Chapter Five: A new day

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Chapter Six: the courtship

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Chapter four: First Christmas

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Chapter five: the nephew

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chapter six: The Wedding

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chapter seven: The first separation

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Lies, Sex and Videogames

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The second separation

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The final separation,

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Chickens, ducks, and a snake.

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Valentine's Day

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Jonah and the Whale

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Chapter Five: The Butterfly Fairy

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New Chapter

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