Rain was rain. When the sky turns grey, you know that rain was going to come. It was just a fact. 

The cold, wet drops coming from the clouds like the sky was crying. Each drop landing anywhere on the planet, making everything in sight wet. 

Rain is just like tears. Tears come and go, but will always be apart of you. Like how it would never stop raining. 

Tears can come when you are sad, happy, frustrated, or even if you just feel like crying. They are tears. 

Tears is just like rain, so does that mean Rain Handle has to be grey and damp all the time, or can she be dry and happy with love.

"Rain, Rain, go away, come again some other day"

 "You are just like rain, you are cold"

"Nobody likes it when you stick around, you ruin everyone’s plans!"

Yes, I do. It's not my fault.

 ---

 Rain is a part of the sky. Does this mean I should be in the sky? Helping rain come down, landing in the perfect spots? Can I help the flowers in the ground grow? Can I make people happy for once?

Or will I also ruin people’s life. Making them depressed in the way I feel? Will I drown them in sorrow? Will they just become depressed because of me?

Rain is a bad thing. Rain just ruins everyone’s day, and I can't do anything about it. Everyone will always despise me, and I will never be able to stop them from feeling that way.

Rain is also a good thing in some cases, because it can help things grow, it can make some peoples first kiss wish come true, it can make the date, or ruin it..

Somehow, I always ruin everything.

Everyone just hated me for some reason. Was it because of my name, my looks, and the way I acted? What did I do to make them dislike me?

I just liked to be myself, sing whenever I could, and practice the drums. People just didn't like that, I guess. I was always the odd one out, it’s like they didn't want the rain to ruin their day.

The hallways of the school were full, people hugging each other as they said their hellos. Summer break was great, but I mostly stayed inside on Tumblr, making sure no one contacted me, but really, who would want to.

I moved to my assigned locker, placing my books inside. I locked it before moving to the main hallway to find my first class. Our school was organized so they had the classed posted on the guidance office windows, and it was in alphabetical order.

I moved to the H's and looked for my name, scrolling my finger down the names on the list. I finally found my name after all the H's, my sister’s name right under it. I sighed, looking over the list to see my homeroom class, which was Vocal Music. I smiled slightly, making my way to the music room when my eyes made contact with one of my friends. She was the only one who really understood me, but I didn't talk to her pretty much all summer.

"Hey, babe', she said, smiling. I gave her a hug before moving out of the way of the people in the hallway, not wanting to get lost in the crowd.

"How are you, Harriet?” I asked. She smiled, her dimples showing.

"I'm really good, I finally got into my guitar class I wanted to get into, it’s my second period class", she replied. I nodded my head slightly, congratulating her before giving her a slight hug, saying goodbye to her before moving to the music room.

I walked into the room, placing my backpack beside my chair as I sat down, and I started waiting for other people to walk into the classroom.

Soon enough, the classroom started filling up with faces I have never seen before. I started getting nervous, not being able to say no to the people who wanted to take my chair so a few boys could sit together. I sighed, getting a chair from the rack and I placed it in the back of the classroom, right beside the practice rooms.

I flipped through the pages in my empty notebook, wondering about all the things I would be learning this semester. The teacher walked in, a few kids trailing behind her, waiting for their schedule.

“Okay class, A lot of you already know me”, she said, looking at the back at me. I blushed slightly, not liking the attention on me as I looked down.

“But if you don’t, my name is on the board. You can just call me Mrs. V. My name is pretty hard to pronounce”, she laughed, sighing to herself. I nodded my head, getting a pen out to start writing stuff down.

“Okay, today we are just going to start with a warm up, so everyone up”, she smiled. Everyone groaned while I just placed my notebook on the black chair, standing behind all the tall people in front of me.

“Okay, so a lot of you know the warm up, so let’s get started. If you don’t know it, just follow along”, she said. We started the warm-up, a lot of kids off key while others just didn’t do it. I rolled my eyes, Mrs. V letting us sit back down again.

I look the notebook into my hands again, writing some things down while I listened to the teacher. I was in a writing mood, so I started to write some lyrics. They were nice and slow, good to an acoustic guitar.

“Okay, so these are your new schedule, just come up when you hear your name and I will give it to you”, Mrs. V said. Everyone got up one by one, people tripping over backpacks and chair legs. This class was very clumsy.

“Rain Handle”, she announced. I got out from my chair, walking over to the front of the room as I grabbed the sheet in front of me.

Vocal – English – Science – French

I sighed, what a perfect semester.

I moved over to my seat, still looking at my table while I walked. When I arrived, my notebook and pen were not where I had placed them.

I looked around for the two objects, worrying about where I had placed them. Laughter grew in the room as I turned around, staring in horror at what I was seeing in front of me.

“Hey, Rain. I like your lyrics, but I personally think this would be better”, the boy snickered, handing my book back. I brought myself to sit in my chair again, wondering what on earth this boy could have written in my notebook. Mrs. V moved passed us, placing notebooks and papers on my chair as I read the lyrics over and over again.

I never thought it would happen

I never saw it change

Bu you were there and it had started

A love I cannot waste

It’s a long time coming but I do know

That I never want to leave

Because you are my one and only

I just want you to see

It’s a Wednesday night and I’m sitting alone –

“And I just want to hear her moan”

I looked at the boys with furrowed eyebrows; they boys were laughing hard, not even caring that they read my lyrics, and changed them.

I let out a huff, moving myself to place the book with the other notebooks and paper I had received. The boys were still laughing as the first bell went, signaling that everyone had five minutes to get to their next class.

I walked past the boys, muttering ‘idiots’ before walking out of the classroom, the booklets that Mrs. V had passed out while I was reading the lyrics in my hands. I was looking down at the floor, not wanting anyone to notice me, not that it was easy or anything. I didn’t stand out, which I was happy about.

I felt a hard body hit me, sending all my papers to fly to the floor. The person who ran into me; or rather I ran into the person, helping me with the notebooks and paper.

“Thank you”, I muttered, looking up to see who was helping me, and I sucked in a breath. It just had to be him, this early in the morning.

“It’s good to see you, Rain”, he laughed, standing up. I stood up as well, giving him a tight smile.

“It’s good to see you as well, Charlie”, I said, looking at him. He didn’t change a bit during the summer. He still looked like himself, in a good way.

 “What class do you have now?” he asked. I sighed, smiling slightly.

“English”, I said. Charlie nodded his head, smiling his beautiful smile.

“Well, I have to go to Science. I will see you around, okay Rainy?” he smirked. I bit my lip, moving my bangs out of the way to see him run off to his next class.

I moved myself along to my English class, remembering how Charlie was last year. He was really funny and a great friend. The only good friend I had besides Harriet.

Charlie was in a small play with me last year. No one really knew I was in it, because I hated attention, but I loved acting. It was like an escape. A way for me to pretend to be someone else, and it was actually allowed.

Charlie was always nice to me, so I never found a reason to dislike him. He was just this kind hearted guy who loved everything.

I kind of developed a crush on him in the beginning of grade nine. I was now in grade ten, and he was in grade eleven. It was a one year difference, but that didn’t bug me at all. It was one year, who really cared.

People might care.

I shook my head, not letting my inner mind get to me. I liked Charlie, and nothing can actually stop me from liking him, nothing can and ever will.

I walked into my English class, sitting near the front this time because sitting the back of an English classroom is the worst.

The class soon filled up with loud students who were not ready to learn. I rolled my eyes, seeing the teacher I had last year walk into the room. He placed his books and suitcase on his desk, facing the front. He talked for a while, letting our brains adjust to the way he ran things in the classroom and everything else.

I went to go grab a sheet of paper from my notebook and my pen when I remembered.

Charlie was still holding them after he picked them up.

 ---

 (A/N: Names that I didn't want people to know are replaced with different names. Some content in this story is also fiction, because the main character in real life in actually in grade nine, she is just a year older in this book, as well is Charlie.)

“Sorry to tell you this now, but Rain has the biggest crush on you”

“That’s great, not right now!”

 ---

I looked around the classroom, everyone working on a task the teacher gave us a few minutes before. I didn’t have anything to write with, as Charlie had all my stuff in his hands. I was afraid to ask around for an extra writing utensil because I was scared on what people would say about me.

“Who doesn’t bring pens and pencils to the first day of school?”

“What and idiot!”

“Waste of space.”

I sighed, looking at the teacher again, but he was in his own world, doing paperwork at his desk.

I bit my lip, closing my eyes as I placed my head down, not wanting anyone’s attention on me.

A loud ringing noise brought me out of my drought as the teacher waved us off, dismissing us. I got out of my chair, moving my book bag onto my back as I walked into the crowed hallways, not knowing where to go.

I went to go look for Harriet. We had to catch up a bit as I didn’t talk to her all summer, which I feel bad about. A body crashed into me as they held my arms with their hands, and I rolled my eyes with fond.

“Hey”, I smiled slightly. Harriet smiled really big, hiding her face with her phone.

“Come on, I’m hungry”, she yelled. I moved my hand from hers when people started looking at the two of us. I felt uncomfortable, but Harriet just dragged me to the cafeteria, finding where out other friend Sophie was.

We sat beside Sophie’s table, all the seats already being in use by other people. I grabbed my lunch out of my bag, placing it on the table. Harriet looked around, and then back to me, and I smiled.

“How was your summer?” she asked. I shrugged my shoulders, taking my food out of the tinfoil it was wrapped in. I picked at the crust on my sandwich, not making eye contact.

“Boring, as usual”, I groaned, looking around at the different people around me. I felt small, like no one actually cared if I was alive or not.

Which, I’m glad they didn’t.

Everyone was loud, people shouting across the cafeteria, while others just talked amongst their friends. I turned my attention back to Harriet, nodding my head.

“Let’s walk”, I said, and Harriet quickly agreed with me, standing up to leave the crowed room.

We walked to the hallway, Harriet running in front of me really excitedly while I walked slowly behind her. She ran closer to me, wrapping her right arm around my shoulders, moving me to the tech hall.

“I really don’t feel like going down here”, I sighed. Harriet furrowed her eyebrows, giving me a concerned look.

“You always want to come down her, why not?” she asked. I shrugged my shoulders, moving my eyes towards the drama room doors, my eyes going wide as I saw Charlie.

“I just don’t”, I said. Harriet walked closer to the drama room, and I whined. Harriet turned around to look at me, with a knowing expression.

“Oh”, she said, smirking. I rolled my eyes, crossing my arms.

“Yeah”, I replied. Harriet shrugged her shoulders, moving to a locker.

“It sucks, because this is my new locker”, she smiled. I huffed, standing beside her as I faced the drama room door, no one in front of me paying attention to anything I was doing.

I turned around when Harriet asked to hold her book bag, which I did. She stuffed her laptop inside, closing her locker again.

“For my next class, always got to have it”, she said. I nodded my head, handing her book bag back.

We talked at her locker for a bit more, Harriet screeching a few times, making me laugh quietly. A tap on my shoulder made me turn around, and to face Charlie.

“Fancy seeing you here”, he laughed. I smiled, looking back at Harriet.

“I’m just here because of her”, I said. Charlie nodded his head, moving to get his book bag off of his back, opening it.

“You forgot these”, he smiled. I went to grab them, but Charlie pulled his hand back.

“What’s the word?” he asked I rolled my eyes, pushing his shoulder a bit.

“Come on, Charlie, just give me the papers”, I frowned. Charlie handed me the papers, poking my cheek.

“I will see you later. See you later as well, Harriet”, he said, walking away from the two of us awkwardly.

“What the hell was that?” Harriet asked. I shrugged my shoulders, placing the papers in my bag.

“I don’t know what you are talking about”, I said, placing my bag on my back again as I moved to walk out of the tech hallway.

“You totally saw the way you talked to him just now!” Harriet yelled, running behind me.

“I really have no idea what you are talking about, Harriet. I was just talking to him like a normal person, like what normal people do”, I sighed.

“You practically yelled at him, Rain”, she replied. I furrowed my eyebrows, looking at her.

“No I didn’t”, I said. Harriet stared at me with disbelief, stopping me in the middle of the hallway.

“Yes you did! ‘Just give me the papers?’ Rain! He might think you hate him!” she told me. I rolled my eyes, walking away from her as she followed behind me.

“No he doesn’t, I could never hate Charlie”, I replied, moving to my locker which was in the gym hallway.

“You are off topic. You yelled at him. What got over you?” she asked. I groaned, opening my locker to put my lunch inside.

“You know I don’t like it when people tease me”, I said, locking my locker.

“How was that teasing?” she asked, pulling a weird face. I leaned against my locker, breathing in.

“He could have just given me the papers”, I said. Harriet rolled her eyes, looking away.

“You are making a big deal over nothing”, she said. I nodded my head, agreeing with her.

“You are right, let’s go, I have third floor”, I told her, moving back into the main hallway.

“Oi, I have third floor as well!” Harriet yelled after me. I smiled, moving to the stairs.

“You know what?” Harriet asked.

“What is on your mind?” I replied.

“Why are these stairs so steep?” she asked, and I laughed really quietly. The stairs at our school were really steep, and I really don’t know why. I remember in grade nine, every time I walked up these stairs, I would be dying when I got to the third floor and I would be walking funny because my legs were killing me.

Now, I am just use to it.

I made it to third floor, with Harriet dying right behind me.

“I never had third floor last year so this is different for me”, she sighed. I shook my head with fond, moving to the end of the hallway after Harriet hugged me and went to her classroom.

I walked into the science room, finding a seat near the back to use. The classroom soon filled up quickly and the teacher walked in, looking at the students before standing in front of us, a fake smile planted on her face.

“Well, I am happy to have you guys in my class, so why don’t we get started and talk about different types of solids?” she said, with so much joy.

I rolled my eyes, laying my head on the desk as she walked around, pointing at different people to answer the question.

“How about you, Ms. Handle”, she smirked. I put my head up slowly, seeing everyone staring at me.

A shot of panic ran through me as I looked at everyone in the classroom, and then back at the teacher. She looked at me, her eyebrows furrowed. She was waiting for me to answer the question.

I felt tears brim at the corners of my eyes, and I placed my head on my desk again, hiding my face in my arms. I heard laughter coming from the other kids as the teacher huffed; moving away from me with her heals clicking on the floor.

I put my head up, tear tracks on my cheeks. I wiped them off with my sleeve, and a few people looked back to stare at me, and then they looked back again. They just wanted to laugh at me again. They always do.

It’s just the way it ran here. No one even cared for me. I was just there for laughs, and it hurt.

I kept my head on my desk the whole period, waiting for the bell to ring so I could go to my next class. It felt like forever, but as soon as it rang, I ran out of there.

I made my way closer to the main stairs, hoping the Harriet would come down the stairs beside me, but I didn’t see her. I bit my lip, walking down the stairs to the first floor; I had to go to a portable.

I bumped into a lot of people going to the gym hallway, many freshmen walking from the gym change rooms, as they had just gotten out of dance or gym.

I made it outside, the fresh air suffocating as I walked slowly to the portable section. I looked up at the sky, enjoying the sight of the clouds up above me.

“Rain, wait for me!” Sophie said. I turned around, looking at her, her curly hair flying in the wind as she ran closer to me.

“Hey, Sophie”, I said quietly. Sophie smiled at me, her braces shining bright in the sunlight.

“Where are you off to?” she asked. I pointed to the portable, turning back to her.

“French”, I whispered. Sophie smiled, grabbing her arm with mine.

“I am as well, let’s go together!” she said. I ran after her, not being able to catch my breath when we arrived to the portable.

“Why did we run?” I asked. Sophie shrugged, looking at her timetable.

“Portable seven, right?” she asked. I nodded, making her smile grow bigger.

“Yay! We have a class together, this is amazing”, she said. I nodded my head again, wrapping my arms around myself.

We walked into the portable, and the kids that were already in there stared at the two of us. I looked down while Sophie ran over to the far corner, sitting down.

Her other friends were here, to be exact, all of her other friends were here.

I sighed, sitting in the only empty spot left, which was in the far corner.

The class itself was boring, the teacher just going on about how her trip to France over the summer.

No one actually cared.

The students laughed at all the pictures she showed us, but me. I sat in the corner, re writing the song that the boys had ruined.

“That’s the start of grade ten French! This will be an amazing year!” she smiled. We all nodded our heads, and the bell went, and we all ran out of the portable, and out into the school.

I made my way inside the school once again, moving to my locker. Many people passed by me as I closed my eyes, wanting everyone to just leave me alone.

I finished my business at my locker and I made my way to the front doors, where Harriet would be waiting for me.

This has always been our meeting spot ever since grade nine. We would stalk hot guys from this corner and talk about our favorite bands.

Now, I just don’t like to talk.

I waited for her for a few more minutes, before my phone vibrated and I got a text from her.

Harriet: Sorry, Rain. My brother picked me up. I will ttyl!

I sighed, placing my phone back in my pocket as I walked out of the school, my hands wrapped around my body.

 I watched as a lot of people got into their cars with their parents, friends talking with each other, and couples holding hands. I bit my lip, turning away from the scene playing out in front of me as I walked further away from everyone. No wanting anything to bother me.

It took me thirty minutes to walk home, and when I did, I ran to my room and flopped on my bed, not bothering to take my shoes off.

I wrapped myself in my blanket and sobbed.

No one even heard me.

No one even cared.