God Save the Queen

 

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Introduction

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Chapter 1

“Today, Her Majesty the Queen Elizabeth was seen at the Christening of her third great-great grandchild. The Prince William and Princess Katherine greeted the crowd with their children before and after the ceremony.” The television droned on in the corner of the pub.

“Hang on, the Queen's still livin'?”

“You know she is, Harold. You want another?”

“Thank's Benny. How can she still be alive? She must be pressing a hundred now.” Harold slurred his words as his sixth ale rolled into his hands.

“Hundred and twenty five, actually.”

“How?”

“What?”

“How's she still around? Ain't nobody that old.” Benny had to admit, Harold had a point. The Queen, God bless her soul, was around long before any of them. And she seemed determined to keep on going.

“I say, props to her for keepin' at it. You wouldn't bat an eye if she were a man, why 'r you complainin, eh?”

“I aint got nothin' agin' her being a woman, Jim. I'm just askin' how can she keep standing? I mean, who else is capable of livin' that long? The longest I've heard was an old gal who went to a hundred'n'six. How does she do it?”

“You think she's hyped up on drugs? The good stuff we can't get our hands on.”

“Nah, the way tabloids are now, we would've heard something. If she had a doctor, he'd be making millions and would probably be braggin' about it too.”

“She could have had surgery. You know, replaced her hips, liver, anything, to keep going.”

“Even with all the money in the world, you can't replace everything, you just couldn't go on.”

“She could be somethin' else entirely.” Harold's words were near incomprehensible. “She could be a—hic!—a vampire.... or a zombie...or...”

“Or Minerva reborn, or maybe a robot!” the other pub members laughed at the drunken proclamations. Benny took the half finished ale from the mans hand. He'd help Harold sleep on the counter till closing time.

“She could be a puppet. A wooden doll for the Conservative Party to further their agenda!”

“Gary, the Conservative Party hasn't been in the majority for over twenty years.”

“You remember those large storage crates brought into the Palace, some forty years back? I was part o'the transport team that was brought in. They were fridgerators, large ones, ya know. Big enough to hold a horse.”

“Cyrogenic sleep? That, gents, is the best excuse I've heard yet!” the patrons finished their drinks and left one by one. Benny laughed at their little game. Just before closing, he moved to switch the television off. The Christening story was still playing. To this day Benny couldn't be sure, but he couldn't shake the feeling that throughout the recording, the Queen never took her eyes off him.

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