i drank
at her house, before
leaving, i walked,
until i couldn’t tell
which way i was
going, which way the
road
was paved, if i
was walking
down or waking
up,  i

didn’t know where
i was, where
i was headed, the name
of the president, the
year
i graduated,

i decided
to sleep outside, two
coats, heavy
boots, and everywhere
the sounds of
people living better
lives
than me, found

a bench
that looked like
it could enjoy the
company of a
wretch, laid down, looked
at the sky, shot
from the hip, shooting
for the stars,

i couldn’t say
my address, my shoe
size, my favorite
beatles song, all that raced
through my mind was
wine, and
her name, like midnight,
like stars, like so
many blinking lights, blinking,
bleeding, fading,
into obscurity.

the world
whispers to me 'you
are great,'
long enough for me
to tackle the
universe, lose
all balance, punching
out all lights, i'm
out cold, only to
wake up
five years later, wondering
who i am.

aren’t they
bright, the stars
burning in the night-
-time sky, like
the blinking eyes of dying
giants, so much
more like a violent
array of headlights in
the bleak, black shadows
after an entire
existence
spent in night, i can
watch them
all melt away, to
me, they mean nothing.