The mind is our most powerful tool, capable of the ability to create or destroy. Love, as beautiful and magical as it is, can damage and taint the most logical mind. One’s emotions can become overwhelmed, corroding their sanity enough to alter the individual beyond repair. The rational brain becomes plagued with irrational thought once passion and affection ignite. These feelings can evolve into extreme obsession.
I don't recall having seen him during those times. After the move, I busied myself getting organized, bought things for the apartment, worked on updating my Resume', purchased a new car, and went to Rusty’s every day.During a telephone call with Angel; I commented it dawned on me my whole reason for having moved to Bluewater Springs was to be with Cody, his new bride, and my granddaughter. ‘I’ve wondered how long it would be before you to realized that!’ I can’t bring forth the first time I set eyes on him. The thing is, something hit me. I’m reminded of the song by Lobo, ‘I’d Love You to Want Me.’ I found him intriguing, even mystifying. He reminded me of Cody, but differences existed. Though I didn’t know him at all, the strangest and most overwhelming sensation of love, caring, and concern swept over me. There was something else…”
They set April 20th as the tentative closing date. Due to retire October 31st, it made no sense to transfer. Come October 31st, I’d have to leave and move to Bluewater Springs. Although I had little to look forward to, intention lingered because of familiarity with the area. My daughter-in-law wouldn’t even return calls or messages. We never formed a bond as a result of Cody. I recall the saying, “It’s a nice place to visit!”
I found it fascinating he could sit for hours playing games on his phone. As time passed, I noticed others gravitated toward him. Male and female, almost all older. They said hello, exchanged brief chat, and followed with a half hug. Most of them were regulars. I noticed people I had not seen before, but they knew him, and the same pattern played out.When these people congregated, the life of the party revolved around him, though he appeared far removed. Yes, he engaged in brief conversation. A member of his clique spoke a few words, and he said a few in return. He always returned to his phone game. He preferred sitting with females. Of the regulars, they were older — mid-thirties and into the fifties. It’s as if a harem surrounds him.
One, a lady named Sandra, took an instant liking to me. She doesn’t keep company or converse with anyone except Allison. Over the months, I became aware of her allocation of painful events and memories. Her husband passed away years ago, and her son died of a drug overdose. A longtime male friend committed suicide. Despite misgivings, I liked her. I enjoyed her company and our talks. We empathized with each other, and she often told me she loved me. I saw the possibility of a closer relationship. Another, Jack, a quiet and low-keyed gentleman in his forties, who is a hard worker with a tale to tell.
At the time my mother carried me, her mental state confined her to an institution. When it came time to give birth, transfer to a general hospital took place. After delivering me, she returned to the mental hospital and remained a few years. She continued the rest of her life going in and out of psychiatric facilities.I learned in my teens the reason for her mental disorder. While pregnant with my sister, and while delivering, she experienced complications. A year later, during the birth of my brother, complications developed once more. They were so severe she almost didn’t survive. The doctor told her if she ever became pregnant again, she’d in all likelihood die in the course of giving birth. The doctor performed tubal ligation surgery to prevent future pregnancy. Ten years later, she became pregnant with me.To the immediate south of our house, a Shell gas station and garage took up the rest of the street block. Three brothers owned and operated it. They leased a small section to a gentleman who ran a transmission repair shop. All these people were a positive influence. They tried to take care of me. However, they could not protect me from evil they didn’t recognize.