The story that you are about to read is true.  Nothing is made up, or left out.  True, you have to have lived through these experiences in order to fully understand.  Maybe with the words contained herein, you will gain insight.  Then again, maybe not.  

As an adoptee, it was a long term goal to adopt a child.  To be noble and offer a child a family, a home and stability.  My family got so much more than we bargained for in the process.  Would we change any aspect of the life we live?  

The complex answer is no. 

Initially Mother and I attended sessions with thought of offering foster-care to at risk youth or infants in need of extra care. At the time, Mother was a stay at home mom who did day care when needed to supplement the family budget.  As we went through these sessions we struggled with the concept that our family may grow attached to a child placed in our care, only to have that child either return home, or move to a different residence.  

Thoughts were along the line that our family would be disrupted in such an event.  

As a result, and having four children under the age of 7 in the home, we discussed at length the idea of switching to adoption.  One of the children that my wife often cared for was in the foster system.  He had been coming to our home off and on for three months.  The only life he knew was foster care.

We made the decision to begin the home study process.   By completing the study, we would have accomplished two things.  One, we would be a step closer to being approved for adoption if we chose to go that route.  Two, At the end of the process, if we chose to not pursue either foster care or adoption, we would be out little more than our time, and the cost of any background checks.  

If you ever want to learn something about yourself, or your partner, go through a home study.  We had been married for 7 years at this point, and I thought I knew everything there was to know about my bride.  Turns out I didn't know a thing.  At least not the really important things.

It is important to note a key piece of the home study.  The case worker asked me what I would base my parenting style on.  My reply was television, shows such as "Leave it to Beaver", "Father Knows Best", "The Brady Bunch" and others.

The case worker then asked me "You know, those aren't representative of reality...  right?"

My response, "Well, neither was the way I grew up."  

At this point I could tell that she needed a more thorough explanation.  So I explained it a bit further, "I grew up in a single parent household with many step-dads all vying for dad of the year awards.  That was my reality."  

I elaborated further by following that comment up with the idea that a child should be raised to respect all life, all cultures and the differences that make people human.  

The day that we were approved for adoption, our future son was released for adoption.  The child that we had hoped would become ours, the one that we provided day care for from the time he entered foster care at 10 days of age, was available for adoption.  

Serendipity. 

We had been given no guarantees that this would happen.  

The really neat thing about this?  He knew us.  He knew our whole family.  We are in the photos that were taken at his first birthday party.  

He came to live in our home on December 28th.  

Six months later, just after his second birthday, our whole family went to the court house to finalize the adoption.  

Our story doesn't end there.  This is just the beginning. 

How the rest of the story will be written.  

There will be 3 main parts.  Pre-k, k-3 and 4 to 7.  As of this initial draft, he is in the 7th grade and functioning academically at grade level.  Some chapters will be longer than others.