I'm in mine favourite spot...the pool house, it's 7 pm on a summer day and the weather is still very warm although is already dark, all the doors leading to the pool house are open and the summer breeze its touching my skin, which is an amazing feeling while reading a book and sitting down on my favorite sofa.
Although most of my friends were partying, I was having an amazing time in my own way, the reason I felt so comfortable at the pool house was because I wasn't able to hear my father from here, our relationship was not good at the moment, or should I say for the last 2 years...
Suddenly a shadow took my attention from my book, I could hear the footsteps, without thinking twice, I stood up and grabbed the first thing I could reach and got ready to hit the intruder, as soon as he stepped inside I aim to his head, but as fast as a heartbeat he grabs the lamp from my hands and now under the light I can see clearly his face...Adam?!?
"Adam!!! What the heck, I could have hurt you!!!"
"With that Fluffy Pink lamp?" he was now laughing out loud putting the lamp away "Oh sis, seriously you couldn't have something less adorable to hit somebody with?!?
I was now looking at him with a straight face, how could I even try to look upset when his laugh was the most entertaining thing on the planet, soon we were both sitting on the couch laughing.
"Seriously Sis, I have to teach you how to fight, a Pink lamp...oh how funny!!"
"Well was that or Mums ugly vase..." and although I hated that thing, I knew she would kill me if I brooke it, even if it was to safe my own life....not kidding
I throw a pillow at his face, and I just had started a pillow fight, Oh No what did I do?!
A few minutes after and with a really painful tummy ache from all the laughing, we were both staring at each other with a straight face, we could hear the fight coming from the main House, Mum and Dad were having one of their very often arguments...
We went into the house and as soon as they saw us, they walked in different directions, mum was cleaning her tears and went upstairs to her room and Dad went to his office slamming the Door behind him.
Adam gave me a smile and followed Mum, I was going back to the pool house, but stopped myself and walked towards Dad's office instead.
I took a deep breath and knock.
"Yes," Dad answered, I opened the door and walked in, he was sat on his desk, smoking.
I went to open the windows because of the smell and stood in front of him with my arms crossed.
"Why do you treat her like that?" I asked him with a serious face, I didn't know why I would bother to ask, but I was sick and tired of living like this.
"Aria, my problems with your mother are not your concern " he answered, not looking at me, instead he was looking at his burning cigarette.
"It's my concern when I do care about her, more I can say in regards to you!" My tone was somewhat harsher now, did he even thought about her?
"Don't you dare to say that!" He banged the desk, now looking straight at me with fury on his face "You don't know what you're talking about!"
"I can see her going into disrepair, crying each day, and I don't see you doing anything about it!" I was scared of him, but this was a fight that I wasn't going to back down "Do you feel anything?" I asked him with a deadly serious voice, he put his cigarette out, stand up and strolled towards the window, playing Judas on me.
"Why are you like this? Why can't you be a normal father and husband?" I walked closer to him.
"I'm doing my best Aria, it may not be enough on your eyes, but I'm trying my hardest to keep this family together" he said never turning his face at me "You have a problem with my Job, but is what it is, I'm not going to ask you to accepted it, but while living under my roof, I don't allow you to say certain things"
"That's not fair!" I said crying, he turned back, facing me now.
"What's not fair is to fight with your mother over your..." he was shouting angrily.
"Over what?" I shouted back
"Enough Aria!!" He lifted his forefinger and named towards me.
"No!! How could you treat us like this? We are your family, I'm embarrassed about what you do!! Of what you are!! You act like you are the ideal Husband and Father, however, you are a long way from that" my tears were tumbling down from my face, he was gazing at me, prepared to blast.
"You are no one to judge me Aria!" He said, breathing heavily, I never saw him this angry before, but I couldn't stop.
"Really?! You are the worst person I know, what you do for a living is disgusting, I can't envision the things you do" I was going to walk away, I couldn't do it anymore.
"What things? What exactly you know?" He asked me quietly, I stopped and turned back to face him once again.
"You deal drugs and other illegal stuff," I said seemed like was nothing, yet it was so difficult to state it so anyone could hear, he didn't reply, rather he was looking down at the floor, wasn't he going to deny it? "You do, don't you?" I asked he looked into my eyes, with a mist of sadness and anger.
"Yes" he replied, not breaking the eye contact
"Did you ever killed someone?" I asked, but already knowing the answer, although inside of me, I was hoping that I was wrong, that my dad wasn't capable of such a thing...
"Yes...I did" He whispered, he didn't look at me, his response was echoing in my head, I had this glimpse that maybe, just maybe he wasn't a monster...but my hope vanished into thin air just like that.
I couldn't see him well now in light of the fact that my eyes were loaded with tears "How could you?" I asked him, not by any stretch of the imagination needed to hear the appropriate response.
"It was part of the Job, it had to be done." He said it like it was a typical undertaking of an ordinary occupation.
I started to walk out of the office, I didn't want to hear more.
"Aria!!!!" He called me, but I didn't turn back, I went straight to my room and locked the door behind me, I lean my back against it and slide to the floor, embracing my legs, and cried...
I woke up with a pain on the left side of my body, I was cold and for some reason my bed was very uncomfortable, finally I found the courage to open my eyes, and I realised the reason of my soreness, I have fallen asleep on the floor, I guessed I did not found my way to bed after breaking down completely...
I got up and dragged myself toward my en-suite bathroom, I didn't like the girl gazing back at me in the bathroom mirror, my makeup was completely smudge and my hair a mess, but what stunned me the most was the red baggy eyes, I went into the shower and hoped the water would wash up the majority of my outrage and pity.
After the shower, I got on with my matinal routine, and headed downstairs, crossing my fingers hoping that my Dad had left to work already, unfortunately, fate wasn't kind to me.
As soon as I step out of my bedroom, I saw him at the end of the hallway closing his bedroom door, I just stood there for a second, his appearance wasn't as better than mine, he said "Good Morning" and I just nodded, he was going to say something, but I didn't let him even start, I walked quickly downstairs, surprised that I didn't tripped all over the stairs.
I don't think I ever saw my mother completely happy in the last couple of years, funny it was exactly the same time that my arguments started with Dad after finding out what his job was...
This morning while I was having breakfast, I looked at her and she had this sadness in her eyes and was attempting to hold the tears, I knew precisely who left her in this state, my father the person who should make her happy, however, was the purpose behind her torment.
" I don't get it, Mum?!?" I said looking at her back.
"What dear? "she reacted with the most minding voice on the planet, not taking her eyes from the oranges that she was cutting to make fresh squeezed orange juice, although we did had a housekeeper, she wouldn't allow anyone else to make the fresh juice in the morning.
"You mother, I don't get it how you accept living like this, you should stand up for yourself to him, he doesn't deserve you, he is the most reckless and ..." she stopped me before I could wrap it up.
"Stop it Aria! "She said stopping what she was doing, in spite of the fact that I couldn't see her face, I could hear the torment in her voice.
"But Mum, I can see you are in agony, I can hear your heated arguments every night, he doesn't deserve you!!" discussing him made me so furious!!
"Aria!! Please Dear, stop talking about this, everything is fine, he is just busy with work, you know that..." and she turned to face me, never changing the sadness on her face " Please Aria, don't make this more difficult than needs to be", she was now looking straight at me, I couldn't take it anymore.
"No!! Enough is enough mother, how can you ask me to ignore it, to watch you sad every single day, when was the last time you smiled or laughed?" - I was now standing looking straight in her eyes, it was painful but I needed to say it " Busy with work?! Which work?? He is the leader of a Gang for Goddess sake! It's not a Job!!"
I was upset to the point that I didn't understand I was yelling now and towards the side of my eye I could see Adam gazing at my "insubordinate" state of mind, however, I had to let it out
" He is a monster!! I hate him and I hate to seeing you like this!!" I had to run away from there, I couldn't stop the tears any longer, I run as fast as I could and went to my bedroom, I couldn't breath, this was too much. " what a messed up family " I whispered between tears...
A job she said, all of my friends had a lawyer, doctor, chef,musician...etc as a father, me a leader of a gang ...it's weird and I can't really share that with anyone, except to my best friend Zoe, to all my other friends my dad is a business man, very powerful business man that's why explains the constant presence of bodyguards and huge men in our house...
My life is a Lie, it's a family thing, it started generations ago and passed from Dad to Son, meaning Adam would be next in line...it makes me so sad, he is my best friend, he's always there for me, and imagining him becoming my father it scares the hell out of me!!
Adam doesn't want it, but he will do wherever my Dad says, I used to love my dad until I found out what his 'Job' really was, I can't believe he is capable of such a things ...my thoughts were stopped by a knock at the door...
Peaking was Adam with the most concerned eyes " come in " I said giving up a small smile.
"Are you sure is safe? No fluffy Pink Lamps?!" He asked with both hands in the air like he was surrendering, I immediately started to laugh, he was the only one who could make me laugh in the most horrible situations.
Adam sat down on the end of my bed and I was sitting by the headboard holding my both legs and resting my chin on my knees " what's up Aria?" Adam asked looking straight in my eyes.
"What do you think?" I answered looking down, I couldn't share all my thoughts with him, it would hurt him.
"Aria, I'm here for you, you realise that right?" obviously, I knew it, yet until when? After he's taking the lead, will I ever be able to have the same relationship with him? Will he be there for me? Will he change into the same reckless and cold person as my fathers ? I can't imagine and that really scares me...
My phone started to ring, it was Zoe my best friend
"Hey Aria, I miss you, I was calling to invite my bestie to go out with me tonight." Zoe was my best friend, but she was more like my sister, she knew all my secrets, sometimes I didn't even need to use words for her to understand exactly how I was feeling.
"Oh, of course, I would love that!! Where?" I asked her, looking at Adam that was still sitting on my bed.
" Let's go to that bar near the beach, it's 'Impact' or something, " Said Zoe.
"No doubt sounds incredible, I'll get you at 9 pm?" I asked, sincerely I rather drive, I don't usually drink.
"Sounds Good!! " she immediately answered, and we hang up.
"So you're going out?" Asked Adam, looking at his phone now.
"Yes, we are heading off to that Bar close to the Beach" I was now wondering what he was doing on his phone
" Cool, I'm inviting Nick and we can all meet there, what time?" He asked putting his phone down, Nick was Adams best friend, a handsome guy with brown hair and green eyes, I used to have a crush on him for years until I found out how disgusting he was towards girls.
" We?! There is No we!! You are not coming with me, why do you want to come anyway, I thought you didn't even like Zoe that much?!" I stood from my bed, why was he coming with us? Adam could be very protective so going out with him, it was like going out with my Father.
"I'm coming, there is no discussion, I'm not leaving you alone!!" And just like that, he stormed out of my room.
What the heck?! What's the issue with him? I can deal with myself, Adam used to be more chill out, but I guessed spending so much time with Dad has changed him, he was in college with a Football scholarship, but Dad wanted him to drop out, funny how most parents want their kids to go to college, except for mine, but have I mention my family is everything except normal?
My passion was actually law, but not on my father eyes...although I fought my way and I was going to start law school in the next fall.
Well after a shower, getting dress and applying makeup, I was ready and it was now 7.30 pm so was time for a light snack.
I walked out of my room and walked towards Mum room, but was empty, where was Mum?!
The house was strangely quieter than usual, I stepped downstairs, and I found Mum in the dark sitting on her favourite chair in the living area, she was holding a glass with a liqueur.
"Hello Mum, are you alright?" I asked and turned on the little light next to her seat, her face was exceptionally pale and her eyes were red like she had cried, she didn't respond to my nearness, I lower myself down on my knees, directly before her and set my hands on her lap.
"Mum, what's wrong?" I was whispering, I don't know why, however just came out that way, her eyes lit up and she took a glance at me, in spite of the fact that her face didn't change, her eyes said it all, she was in shock like something truly awful happened...
" Mum, what's wrong? You are frightening me..." - no answer rather her eyes were presently loaded with tears and she couldn't hold it any longer, she began crying with no ceasing, I lifted myself up putting my arms around her, and said nothing for a bit, allowing her to let it out until she could tell me wherever that was troubling her.
After what appear like an unfathomable length of time, she at last, said " Aria, your Father is missing...Anton just called and said they can't find him...Aria what are we gonna do?..." Anton was Dads right arm.
I stood up and it seemed like the world stopped for a moment, everything was in slow motion, I couldn't breathe...
I could hear Adam asking what was wrong, but I felt like I was in this trance and my body wouldn't move, you know when you can hear everything around you, like yet seems like you are extremely far away and in spite of the fact that you need to respond, yet can't?
That's how I felt, for some reason, I felt like I wouldn't see him anymore, and that he was trying to tell me something last time we spoke...
Adam was making phone call after phone call, I decided to take Mum to bed, and after two sleeping pills, she was finally resting, I texted Zoe to cancel our plans, and told her what happened, she tried to call but I had no energy whatsoever to talk about it with her right now.
I found Adam sitting on the sofa with his elbows on his knees and his face buried in his hands, I sat down next to him, and gently rubbed his back, after a couple of minutes he was sitting up and had this horror face, I knew instantly he felt just like I did, a part of me kept saying that everything would be ok, but I couldn't shake the feeling that I would not ever see my Dad ever again and I think Adam thought the same.
"Should we cal the police?" I asked with a trembling voice, not knowing what the right move was at this point.
"No, Aria we both know, this is something bigger than the cops can handle," he said rubbing his temples "I have all of Dads Men searching for him, yet I think Anton knows more than what he is letting me know"
"Adam" I hated asking him what I was about to ask "what's going to happen if Dad is really gone?"
"I don't know, Aria" he answered, I couldn't stop the tears anymore.
"I'm scared..." Adam hugged me as soon as I said this last words, he has always been there for me, he was the best big brother a girl could have.
"I'm here little sis, I'm right here" I could hear the pain in his voice, he hugged me tightly, my eyes were so heavy, and everything went black