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Hope

 I have always dreamed about having a child. To me that’s the biggest achievement in life, to bring new life into the world. To have a child to love and cherish. 

  Me and my partner had been speaking for a while about having children. We really wanted to start our own family. And we decided it was time. Now, we can’t get pregnant as easy as most couple as we were both girls. So we had to find a donor that was willing to help us start our family. We saw a few different people who could help, but we didn’t want just anyone’s help. We decided to ask one of our mates to help.

 We traveled to meet him and went for dinner. We asked him if he would help. He said YES!! We were so happy, the drive home all we did was smile.

The next few months we tracked my ovulation, so we could be certain when I was the most fertile. 

The time had come for the insemination, we was one week away. But luck wasn’t on our side. 

He was in the army and couldn’t make it down in time. We were disappointed that it couldn’t happen this month. 

The next week we decided to go out for drinks with some other mates. It got to about 1am and we got to talking about us wanting a baby. The people we were with offered to help. They said they would do it that night. (As I was at my most fertile time). 

So we went home and they dropped round the sperm. 

We did the insemination that night. We were so excited, we finally had hope. Hope that this would work and we could finally start our own little family. Hope filled our heart. I prayed that this would work.

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Regret!

 The very next day, the donor started to have regret of helping. He asked if we had done the insemination, hoping that we didn’t. We told him we did. He wasn’t too happy. He was scared. He didn’t know what to do. Eventually he said he didn’t mind as long as nobody found out that he was the one who helped. He didn’t want anybody knowing who he was. 

He thought if it worked that people would know straight away that it was him who helped. He was totally freaking out about the whole situation. 

He was going to ask us to take the morning after pill, but he never did. 

For him the next two weeks were going to be filled with fear, he would be hoping that it won’t work. 

To be honest there wasn’t a lot of sperm used, we weren’t overly confident that it would work either. But at least we had hope. 

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Waiting game

 The next two weeks went by so slowly. I know this may sound strange,  but the very next day after the insemination I knew I was pregnant. My stomach felt strange. I had a different feeling than normal. I told my partner, she smiled but I new she thought it was because I had so much hope I was imagining it.

After a week went by we were starting to think it wasn’t going to work, the more we spoke about it the more we got convinced are hopes were just that ‘hopes’. 

As it got closer to the second week, I began to get a temperature, it would come and go. My stomach began to hurt, I had loads of gas, that was getting trapped in my stomach and making me bloated. 

I started to look up the early signs of pregnancy. I had most of them. ‘Hot flushes’ ‘gas’ ‘pains In my lower back’. I started to get excited. All I could think was that I was pregnant. My heart was racing, I just wanted to know. But it was too soon to take a test. 


It was nearly time to take the test. We just had to wait one more day! We went shopping and bought some pregnancy test. Once we got back I was just so excited and couldn’t wait. So I did one as soon as we were back. I didn’t think it would work as I wouldn’t even be two weeks yet. I took the test and put it on the side, waiting for the results. 

It was the longest two minutes of our life! We looked at each other then look at the test....

I was pregnant!! We was so happy, all I could do was smile. This was all we have ever wanted! 

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Dreaded call

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