I'm tired. And I know that's a shitty way to start my first novel or whatever, but it's true. I'm tired of being in English class 3 times a day. Like, what are we trying to accomplish here? I don't even really know what I should be writing about, but I suppose I should figure it out. My teacher just said to "vomit on the page", but that sounds pretty nasty and I'm not in the business of doing nasty things that could potentially cause Ebola. Ha-ha. Just kidding, I know what she means but maybe she could at least find a better, less gross way to say it.
    I don't know, I guess I'm just being catty because of this dumb assignment. Now how could anyone in their right mind consider 50,000 words an acceptable assignment. I just will never understand. However, it is getting me a more than a marking period's worth of credit so I'll do it. I mean, I do need the credit, I start college this spring but can't if I don't graduate high school obviously. So I really need to just get done at this stupid place.
    I still can't think of anything to write so I'm just going to introduce myself. My name is Cara Lancaster, I am 16 years old, and I hate everyone. No, seriously, that's not just the Percocet talking, I actually hate everyone in my town except for my lovely boyfriend, Tanner. I am 5 foot 2 inches, or 62 and-three-quarter-inches as my doctor says. I have green eyes and dark brown hair. I live in Round Top, Texas and I hate that, too. There's nobody here, there's nothing to do, and there's no people to talk to or hang out with. Basically, I spend all day at my house on the ranch, riding my horse, Magnum, and doing homework and watching my goats butt at each other. No, I'm being serious. All I ever do involves livestock and school work. Can you say no life? Like, even my boyfriend lives with me and there's still nothing to do. He rides his horse, Jack, and watches me watch my goats and do my schoolwork. So basically there's no other enticing moments in my life.
    I guess I'm done bullshitting this assignment because I need a good grade, so I'm gonna start doing it seriously.

Last cigarette- 6/23
Last sober- 6/21

    Well today, I woke up, smoked a cigarette, got undressed, weighed myself, got in the shower, got dressed, and went back to sleep until noon. Kinda pissed because I weigh 143 pounds, but I guess that can change. I just won't eat today, LOL, just kidding. I will just go for a run then eat light meals. I haven't weighed more than 140 in months. I'm going to put on my running clothes and go running now, I'll write back later.

    I love to run, especially when it's hot and muggy out, just pushes me to run harder and get done faster. I ran about 2 miles today, not too shabby for someone who smokes, ha-ha. How long do you think it took me to do it? About 28 minutes. I know, it's a bad time, 14 minute mile, but its faster than everyone sitting on the couch. That's what I always tell myself, that no matter how slow I go, I'm always lapping everyone on the couch.
I like to run down the back roads of Round Top because no one ever drives them and so there's no one to see my fat body jiggle and wiggle. I get really self conscious about it, so I typically just run really really slow as to not aggravate the jiggling. I never know what to eat after a run, like, I always feel like eating about a trillion and ten calories, but I know that would completely defeat the purpose, so I refrain from that. I usually grab an apple, and munch on that for a little while. Fulfills the hunger at only about 100 calories.

    I don't really know what else to write, besides the fact that me and Tanner got in a fight today. I guess he wants to join the military, but clearly, being me and being as lonely as I am, I don't want him to go. So he said it's his life and no one can tell him what to do anymore because he's "20 god damn years old." And I came back with, "So you're saying you don't care that I'll be alone without anyone around." That just caused more issues and I don't know. Maybe I should let him go. I mean, it ain't my life, he should get to do whatever he wants. The only things I'm worried about are him getting hurt, and me being all alone. Selfish, I know.

    My mom won't leave me alone today. She says I'm spending too much time on this assignment rather than do my other school work. But hello, this is worth almost a half a year of work so I definitely think I should be working on this. I still have 5 months of school to get the rest of my work done, and I'm half done with all of my classes already so why not finish one up before my official senior year? After English, I only have Government, Economics, and US History, so that's good.

    Well, it's about 7:30pm now, and I'm getting kinda tired and don't have shit to do tonight, so I'm just gonna go to bed. I'll write tomorrow.