My Heart's Not Big Enough

 

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**Rewrite of I Love You....but wait, I'M NOT STRAIGHT!!!**
  
  Beloved is like any other girl. She has a weird name, sure, but that hasn't really stopped her from having a normal life. Her girlfriend Gracie adores her name, though that doesn't really count because Gracie adores a lot of things. Yes, Beloved has a girlfriend, she is a lesbian, gay, homo, whatever you want to call her. She doesn't really care, she believes who she likes is her business and no one else's. 
  
  Gracie is the popular girl. Which is odd since she is dating Beloved, who everyone considers an outcast. She is a lively and bubbly girl. She can be very sensitive, especially when it comes to those she loves. However, if a person she cares about is in trouble she will do whatever it takes to help them. She doesn't divulge much about her inner thoughts and feelings to anyone but Beloved. She is animated and the most friendliest person you can meet, at least most of the time.
  
  Caiden is a notorious "bad boy". He likes to do anything to piss people off. He is bisexual, meaning he likes both sexes. It doesn't bother him as much as it should. He comes from a conservative family and it is mainly his mother who tolerates him. Everyone else bailed the second he came out. He doesn't give a fuck about them, he likes being on his own.
  
  Ronnie is the stereotypical gay. He is sassy, upbeat and is about as annoying as Gracie. He loves everything that is supposedly odd for a guy to like. He occasionally dresses up as a woman, mainly when he goes to parties. Other than that, he is proud of being a guy, he's proud of being gay, and he is proud of his love for Twilight.

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The Beginning

This party sucks big time. I honestly do not know why I decided to come, I have always hated parties. No matter the type, birthday parties, wedding parties, TGIF parties, all of them suck like a big bag of dicks. 

Oh yeah, that's right. Gracie convinced me to stop by. God that girl is gorgeous, seriously one of the hottest girls I have seen. Of course, that isn't saying much because none of the other girls at my school are attractive, at least personality wise. Gracie, she has got it all. She has the looks, the personality and the brains.

I haven't found a girl this attractive since that time in first grade when I met Leila. I remember that I thought she was the cutest girl in school. The day I met her I immediately asked her to be my girlfriend. 

It didn't go so well, she gave me this look like she didn't understand what I was asking. She claimed that girls aren't supposed to like other girls like that and her mommy and daddy said that it was evil. Not so traumatizing from a grown up's perspective,  but to my six year old mind it was the worst day of my life.

I haven't really had much friends since then. The school I go to, in theory, is very LGBT friendly. In practice though, anyone who tries to come out gets picked on a lot. It is discreet, so none of the teachers know about the bullying. 

If you ever tried to tell them, well, you end up with a bruised eye or worse.

I don't get picked on to much, mainly because I avoid everyone I meet. I learned a long time ago that friends are overrated.

"Bel! I am so glad you made it!" Gracie exclaims as she rushes over and hugs me. My heart flutters in my chest from the contact. God she is so beautiful....

"We are only freshmen once right? Got to make the most of it." Gracie is the host of this wonderful little shindig. It's Halloween night and she thought it would be a good way to keep everyone from getting into trouble if they had a party to go to.

"I know right? I mean, I know freshman year is supposed to be miserable but I know I don't want mine to be like that! Screw the Seniors! Freshmen rule!" She giggles at me before someone from the crowd hollers out her name. She fades into the crowd.

 

888

 

So far this party has been the most dullest thing I have ever been to. It's only been an hour and I am itching to get home already. Sure, Gracie is hot but that doesn't mean I want to spend my entire Friday night standing by the punch bowl awkwardly as every one dances to Lady Gaga.

Sighing heavily, I decided to just head on home. As soon as I head towards the exit Gracie pops into my face. Startled, I let out a shriek and jump back. She just giggles.

"What the hell Gracie, don't scare me like that! It's not funny."

"I thought it was pretty funny." She smiles, showing off her dimples. My anger simmers, I can't seem to get mad at her.

"Whatever. I was just about to head out anyways." I go to walk by her when she grabs my arm.

"What!? Why are you leaving!?" She asks nervously.

"Because I want to go home." I roll my eyes. "I don't enjoy parties that much." I go to pull my arm out of her grasp when she pulls me closer to her with alarming strength. My eyes widen as she lands a kiss on my lips.

Oh. My. God.

At first I try to back away in disbelief. The second her tongue rubs against my lips my knees buckle and I give in. She pulls me closer, stroking my hair and practically sucking the air from my lungs.

Losing myself in the kiss, I place my hands on her ass, groping hard. She moans and I slide my tongue in.

She tastes like strawberries. A low heat clenches in my stomach as we go at each other with lips and tongue. It's like nothing I ever imagined, kissing someone, it's so warm and sensual...

Pretty soon people in the crowd start to notice, mostly it's the drunk jocks who're hooting and hollering. 

Frankly, I don't give a damn. 

Gracie pulls back from the kiss, heavily breathing. Her lips are bright red, her eyes dazed. I did that. I smile lightly to myself at the thought as she guides us to her bedroom.

 

888

 

I start drifting to sleep, fully realizing what I had just done. I just had fucking sex with Gracie Ella Hollow. 

As soon as my eyes droop Gracie giggles from her side of the bed.

"What?" 

"Its just, I didn't know you were a lesbian.... I mean i'm glad you are, its just I was really shooting in the dark back there." Her whole body shakes with laughter. I smirk.

"Well, I am." I smirk. I know better than to tell her about what happened with Leila.

She turns around. "I like you Bel, a lot actually-" I crush my lips against hers, interrupting her.

"I like you a lot too." I whisper against her lips. She wraps her arms around me.

"Well then, will you be my girl?" She smiles slyly.

"Fuck yeah!!" I exclaim, kissing her neck before we both fall to sleep.

 

888

 

It's been two years since that night. Gracie and I are just as strong as ever. Much to the surprise of, well, everyone. It's surprising to me too considering how different our personalities are. She's bubbly, hyper and friendly while I tend to be quiet and shy away from everyone.

Despite these differences I am absolutely crazy about her. She  brightens up my world. But of course a certain some one just had to come along and fuck up everything. 

Caiden fucking Alexander.

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The New Student

"Bel!" Gracie comes running towards me at full speed. I smile and open my arms as she literally knocks me to the ground, smothering my face with kisses. "I missed you!" She exclaims, wrapping her arms tightly around my waist.

"I have only been gone two months!" I hug her, comforted by her lilac scent.

"WELL IT FELT LIKE FOREVER!" She shrieks, I wince at the volume.

I have been in Ohio during the entire summer break, though it wasn't willingly. My mom thought it would be nice for me to visit my grandma because she is turning seventy in a month and my mom thought that I should try to reconcile with her. She literally said that granny wasn't getting any younger and the both of us need to stop being stubborn asses and get over our problems. 

I groan just thinking about it. My entire summer was wasted visiting her. I couldn't really leave the house because granny didn't want anyone to know about her homosexual granddaughter and I spent the majority of the time in my room watching T.V. 

Of course I snuck out but only to be rebellious, and most of those times I just walked around the town sight seeing. I haven't been to Ohio since I came out to granny as a lesbian. It has been quite some time, four years actually.

I remember the day I chose to come out exactly. It was on my birthday, I turned twelve and I felt that it was time to tell her about me. My mom already knew, she had known since the day I asked Leila to be my girlfriend all those years ago.

The rest of my family knew too, hell, even my dad knew and he didn't mind. It was just granny who was kept in the dark because we all knew she wouldn't accept me. 

I knew it too, that she wouldn't like it but I felt that I was old enough and I could handle it.

That evening when we all were gathered in the living room to eat cake and share memories I interrupted the fun. Everyone in the room knew what I had planned, they didn't agree with it but they let me do it anyways. 

It ended badly. 

Once I told her about me she started ranting about sin and that I was going to hell. My uncle had to take her out of the living room to calm her down, she was that furious. I didn't let it show how much it hurt me though, didn't want her to know she affected me that much. 

So you can imagine how badly the two months I spent with her went. 

When I came home I was so angry at mom for putting me through that and I ignored her for over an hour. She knows how homophobic her mother is and no amount of time is going to do anything. Mom could try forcing me to spend time with granny but it won't change a thing. The old woman will still hate me for who I love.

Granny despises me and there are points in my life where I'm not her biggest fan either. I don't agree with her close minded ideals,  our relationship has turned sour and we can't even be in the same room together anymore without starting an argument, but I still love her.

"What are you thinking about?" 

I jerk at the sound of her voice. "Huh?" 

Gracie just smiles lightly, ruffling my hair. "Never mind." She exclaims as she stands up. "There's this new math teacher I want you to meet!" She pulls me toward the math and science building.

"Should I be worried?" I ask jokingly.

"Bel, she's old enough to be my mom!" I burst out laughing. "What?!" She asks curiously.

"Nothing honey." I pat her hand.

 She narrows her eyes, it's comical to say the least. "What ever." I kiss her cheek making her turn a light shade of pink.

"What is her name?" I ask, pulling her along this time.

"Mrs. Alexander. I know you'll like her, she's super funny!" She exclaim as we enter her classroom.

I sigh disdainfully. It's moments like this where I question her sanity. She's just so loud and hyper all the time. We have been together for two years though, and I love her a lot so most of the time I put up with it. She may be my girlfriend, but that doesn't mean she can't get on my nerves.

"Hello!" Mrs. Alexander smiles. "Will your friend be in the class too Grace?" She asks.

"Not this semester." I am mentally screaming for the bell to ring.

The middle aged women returns to her desk, shuffling through papers. "Well I will be looking forward to having you in class next semester then." I roll my eyes. I hate math and math hates me.

It's a relationship that I would rather not change.

"This says here that you'll be in the Second block class." She grins at me. "You'll be in the here with my son!" I raise an eyebrow. Her son? That's going to be awesome.

"Son?" Gracie asks.

"Yes, his name is Caiden. He's a senior." A SENIOR? Oh good lord. Can my life get any worse?

"But isn't this a junior class?" I huff in annoyance, Gracie elbows me in the ribs as a warning.

"Yes..." Mrs. Alexander sighs. "He has to re-take the class because-"

The door opens. A cool breeze blows across the room making me shiver. A boy, or I should really say man, struts into the room. He gives off a bad vibe. He is almost six feet tall with blonde hair and light blue eyes. He's wearing a dark blue denim jacket, a black t-shirt and black jeans. 

He's not that bad looking for a male, despite the cold glare he is giving Gracie and I.

"Mother, you don't need to be telling these girls why I am re-taking the class." He mutters, walking up to the desk. I flinch slightly at how close he is getting.

"I was just answering their question Caiden." He stands there, scowling at the woman.

Well, this is awkward.

"We um.....we better...um...." I whisper, glancing at Gracie for help.

"Head for our morning class!" She exclaims before yanking me toward the door. Just as we exit the room I glance quickly back at Mrs. Alexander. I can't help feeling sorry for her.

"Goodbye girls." Caiden sneers at me before we reach the door.

Just great. I only just met the guy and he already hates me. I can tell this will be an awesome year.

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He Is Such A Dick

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I Won't Be A Rebound

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Soap Opera Plot

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Family Can Be Complicated

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Temptation Sucks

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Drunk Sexy Time

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Broken Hearts Galore

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Life Finds A Way

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Crazy Ex Boyfriends

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Not Everyone Get's A Happy Ending

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Five Years Later

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