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Preface

All stand-up comedians have their own approach to performing and preparing, and most of them prefer to keep their methods to themselves. Therefore, stand-up often appears to be shrouded in secrecy – at least until now, that is. This book will expose these secrets in detail so that you will become familiar with the essentials of doing stand-up as well as with the most commonly applied techniques. Becoming a good comedian requires much practice and hard work, and reading my book won’t, in itself, transform you into one. It will, however, teach you to understand the inner workings of stand-up, setting you up for the best lesson of all: learning by doing. Testing your abilities in front of a live audience is the only way to really improve your act and, along with exercising regularly by yourself, going on stage will stay an important part of the process of developing your material. No stand-up comedian ever succeeded without making an effort. You will experience defeat along the way but with a healthy attitude and an understanding of what went wrong, you will be able to use setbacks to become an even better performer.

This book is a guide to aspiring stand-up comedians that can provide you with the tools needed to do well in stand-up and it will supply you with strategies which should reduce the chances of failure considerably. I’m sharing the knowledge that I myself needed when I was starting out in the profession. So, basically, I’ve written the book I wished had existed back then. Once again, though, I must emphasize that mastering stand-up takes time. As the saying goes, Rome wasn’t built in a day – and, for that matter, it’s yet to be completed. The same goes for composing a stand-up set. To advance the analogy, you may at this point be no further along in the development than the foundational stage, building sewers and preparing roads, but whether or not it seems that you shall soon be ready to invite people into the houses of your city, the most important thing is that everything is taking the right shape and that you enjoy the working process. While the work may continue indefinitely, one day your creation will be so close to being completely finished that it will keep on growing by itself automatically, without you having to develop it consciously. In order to turn yourself into a good stand-up comedian, you need to be taught a wide range of skills. It’s not enough that you are a good performer if you’re unable to write jokes; and the other way around is no good, either. That being said, we all have some things which we are better at than other things. In stand-up, however, you’re never better than your greatest weakness. So strengthening those weak links is one of the most important things when trying to become a better comedian.

The terms and concepts introduced throughout the book are worth familiarizing yourself with so for your convenience there’s a terminology index at the end. Also, in this book I will often mention being “on stage” but for good measure I’d like to point out that it is, of course, very much possible to perform stand-up elsewhere. It’s just a natural manner of expression. Furthermore, I’ve decided to use the male pronoun consistently, for the sake of simplicity, but it goes without saying that this doesn’t mean that there are no female stand-up comedians. Finally, please be aware that in the context of this book a joke refers to a piece of stand-up material. The term, therefore, should not be confused with traditional jokes.

Prologue

When I turned twenty-five I ran out of excuses and decided to do something about my ambitions for making it in stand-up. My on-stage debut took place at an open mike night in a packed comedy café. I had invited two of my friends who sat, waiting to be entertained, along with 130 other people. That particular night, the line-up was divided into two acts, separated by a break. The break ended, and I was waiting in a tiny basement room left of the stage while the host of the evening was doing his audience warm-up. I knew that I was up next, and I could follow along on a television screen which was showing the stage so that I knew when to be ready. Even though I‘d already been to the washroom twice, I still felt like going one more time. My entire body was quivering with excitement and my adrenaline was pumping. It was impossible for me to sit still. I simply had to get up and move about the room. The warm feeling in my body and the butterflies in my stomach were suddenly replaced by heart palpitations and cold sweats when I heard my name ring out from the small speakers of the television: “It’s time for a stand-up debut. Give a big hand to a very, very funny guy – Jens Laursen.” This was my cue. I went on stage, and standing there, in front of the audience, the release of all of my saved-up energy and adrenaline resulted in an out-of-body experience where I felt as though I was watching my own stand-up performance. This debut took about twelve minutes, and it was well-received. Afterwards, I was still on a high from the laughs and the applause from the audience, and I was so thrilled that even after drinking three pints, I was unable to close an eye for the rest of that night.

The rush and the feeling of success lasted for several days, and only a few weeks went by before I was back on stage for another open mike night. I was using more or less the same material this time but, surprisingly, the performance didn’t go nearly as well. I found this frustrating so I went straight home and wrote some fresh material. The following week these new jokes made an impact and I managed to draw even more applause and laughs than the first time around. My subsequent performances went down similarly; every other was a success and those in between were fiascos. When it went well, I was on the top of the world afterwards, feeling unbeatable. When it didn’t, I felt depressed and was annoyed with the audience for not finding my jokes amusing. I considered a bad night a personal failure because I’d put so much of myself out there and hadn’t been rewarded for that. I was thinking about dropping the whole thing. Quitting stand-up seemed like an easy out. But luckily, the successful shows convinced me that instead of giving up I should try to find out how I might improve. I knew that it wouldn’t do any good to stay at home. I needed to watch a lot of stand-up. So I began to frequent open mikes and here I met and got to know up-and-coming comedians who were really funny. As I was eager to do more stand-up myself and also wanted to give these comedians the same opportunity, I started a stand-up booking agency. I was, of course, also hoping that this might be turned into a business. The decision to do this after having only tried to perform six times might easily have proved premature but within long I teamed up with quite a few comedians and after my friend helped me design a nice website, we were ready for bookings. I named the agency Cheap Laughs. If I may say so myself, it’s an apt name, seeing as that’s exactly what up-and-coming comedians are. My reasoning was that reduced costs would be likely to mean more work which, in turn, would help us develop our abilities. Affordable pricing also made it possible to perform at smaller events for which an established, well-known stand-up comedian would be too expensive.

My tenth stand-up performance was a gig through my own booking agency, a surprise at a 30th birthday party. I had been drinking an entire pot of coffee before I got there, in order to reach the same energy level as the birthday guests. I remember having to take a deep breath before pushing the doorbell, in an attempt to calm my nerves before there was no going back. After pulling myself together, I was led to my audience by the toastmaster. There was no mike and no sound system and, even though I was on time, the guests hadn’t finished dinner yet. The only place for me to stand was in the middle of the living room which meant that some were facing away from me and had to turn to be able to watch. I knew that the opening would be crucial to my ultimate success so I had brought a cordless ghetto blaster to help me kick-start the show. I clapped my hands once to get people’s attention and began a short introduction of myself after which I played Benny Hill music while running around between tables, shaking hands with everybody. In this way I got to know all the guests and at the same time got a chance to burn off both my nervousness and the coffee rush. The rest of the show consisted of jokes I had written on the basis of keywords about the hosts and my own stuff, as well as jokes I had borrowed - that is, pinched - from other comedians. I was also able to improvise a joke. Everybody was in a good mood and this 20 minute performance became my longest show so far. I remember that, by the time I was leaving, the warm reception had given me a rush greater not only than the one I arrived with but also outmatching the one felt after my stand-up debut. Not only had I earned 100 dollars, it had been an instructive night which made me hungry for more.

Five shows later all my efforts in the stand-up business came full circle when I went on stage for a stand-up event in a small venue featuring the comedians in my agency, acting as both organizer and host. This night also surpassed all my expectations. The show was filmed by a local TV station and the footage was turned into four 25 minute episodes. More episodes was produced but those I was attached to as an organizer only, because by then I was getting booked elsewhere and I was also busy going to more open mikes. Interest in my booking agency grew gradually larger so I travelled around to find talented comedians. Some of the ones I got in touch with I hired, and I began to have more focus on the agency than on my own stand-up. I did, however, still produce new material, testing it at open mikes every now and then. In the spring of 2009 I arranged a two-week comedy tour, showcasing four comedians, myself included. Here I was the compere as well as the driver. We visited various schools, cafés, community centers and clubs, and the tour was incredibly successful, with laughs and applause everywhere. Later on, I continued to roam open mikes to make contacts with up-and-coming, talented people, and I was proud to see some of the comedians from Cheap Laughs make it onto stand-up shows on television.

I have now chosen to shut down Cheap Laughs to center on other parts of my life. Being a part of the world of stand-up as a booker for four years has been an absolute blast, and my reason for writing this book is, as mentioned, a wish to share my experiences and the lessons the last few years’ employment in the industry have taught me. Other occupations have informed me, most notably having worked for two seasons as a professional guide and my education as a movie actor. On top of my own observations, I’ve also convinced the comedians living and breathing stand-up to give away their “secrets”, merging everything into chapters which should prove very helpful for anybody with a fleeting interest in stand-up.

Use ’The Secrets of Stand-up’ any way you please. Use bits and pieces, use everything – or nothing at all. Whatever reasons you might have for reading this book, the most important thing for me is to give you an understanding of what stand-up is all about and hopefully also prevent you from making the biggest blunders. Enjoy!

How to use this book

If you’re entirely new to stand-up, the best way to read this book is in chronological order. I have taken into account that you might already know about some of the subjects by making sure that the chapters can also be read separately and in a random order. Those who read my book from cover to cover will therefore come across some necessary repetition. In some places I shall refer to sections of the book that are prerequisites for others, i.e. required to fully understand the subject matter as a whole. The jokes I have come up with for the various sections might not all be particularly great ones. They’re meant mainly as examples to make my points as clear as possible.

Here is an overview of the book, with chapter descriptions.

1. Introduction

On humor, laughter and stand-up in general.

2. Stage fright

On how to deal with the worst cases of those pesky “butterflies in the stomach”.

3. Writing stand-up

On everything pertaining to the process of coming up with a topic and turning your ideas into a joke that will work.

4. Preparation

On the best methods for getting ready before a stand-up show.

5. Performance

On how to carry yourself on a stage.

6. Improvements

On how to keep getting better.

7. The stand-up scene

On what to expect of the places you will visit and the people you will meet in the world of stand-up.

Introduction

The most common stand-up style, often called ”pure” stand-up, entails only three things: a comedian, a mike and an audience. I should note, though, that there are numerous variations on this setup such as the use of guitars, bagpipes, complicated sound effects and magic shows. Performers making use of some of those supplements may also be doing stand-up comedy but it is the pure form that this book is about. A stand-up comedian does not need to have specialized knowledge within a specific area. Just as often, he may draw on his lack of information to generate laughs. A comedian works many different parts of himself into his material, e.g. bizarre views, a peculiar outlook on life, various observations on everyday activities or amusing opinions which may or may not be shared with his audience. A stand-up comedian should not be confused with an actor in a theater or revue, for stand-up is not about dressing up nor about playing parts; a stand-up comedian remains himself on stage. Although he is typically an exaggerated and more entertaining version of himself, a stand-up comedian is nevertheless not somebody entirely different on stage, except when he’s imitating someone briefly. Imitations by stand-up comedians don’t involve costumes or props, and usually they take up a small part of a show only. Stand-up shows are found in the pubs, bars and cafés of most major cities, and they also take place in clubs, at festivals, at parties or during corporate events, school events, charity events, etc. No topics are off-limit in stand-up so it’s up to the individual comedian to draw the line, deciding if there are ethical limitations to what it is acceptable to make fun of. Those decisions are part of what sets a comedian apart, on top of his appearance and other personal touches. Whenever a comedian, experienced or not, wants to test and improve new jokes he will do a live performance at an open mike night. By measuring the reactions from his audience from the amount of laughs and the size of the applause, he becomes better at his craft.

Stand-up originated in North America and the comedians used to perform in front of an exposed brick wall and that backdrop, though less common today, is still thought of as the proper one. The art of stand-up is tricky to master. This is because you, the comedian, is completely at the mercy of your audience. A stand-up comedian’s success is measured directly on the basis of applause and laughs; the more, the better. And performing in front of a crowd isn’t always easy because every now and then there is a heckler present. A heckler is somebody who disturbs your show, bothering you with comments and so on. A capable stand-up comedian will manage to hush a heckler by reacting impulsively, directing a fast and spontaneous joke at him.

Doing stand-up may open up opportunities to be hired for other creative jobs. Several talented stand-up comedians eventually get the chance to work in television and/or on radio stations because of the overlap between the abilities they have and the ones needed in the rest of the entertainment industry.

Laughter and humor

Before delving into the many aspects of stand-up, I’d like to supply you with some insights into what makes us laugh. Laughing is, as you’re probably well aware, the basic foundation of stand-up. So in this section, I’m going to describe what laughter and humor mean to us.

We start to laugh much earlier than we’re able to speak, around the age of four or five months. Infants quickly learn that they can get attention by crying and that they’re able to hold on to attention by laughing. Therefore, laughter is established, already at this early time in our lives, as an important factor in our social interactions. Children have yet to erect barriers so their laughter is immediate, innocent and pure. Their laughs are usually spontaneous, expressing the happiness that they wish to share. During puberty the brain slowly changes and, while we develop our own brand of humor, we start to use laughs more consciously. So, as we figure out what we find funny, we start controlling our outbursts of laughter to fit our individual preferences. This is part of growing older. We still use laughter to strengthen social ties but with less spontaneity and more restraint. In their twenties many become more serious and the things that used to make us laugh aren’t funny to us anymore. By then we’re guided more by sense and sensibilities than before which is why bursts of laughter is less common for grown-ups than for children. Surveys show that an adult laughs approx. 15 times a day whereas a child does so somewhere around 400 times. Throughout our lives laughter is considered a sign that we’re happy and content, and laughter has a positive influence on our bodies, both physically and mentally. When one laughs, the brain releases endorphins into the bloodstream. These endorphins are chemicals that work as a natural morphine for our bodies, making us feel good by relaxing all joints and muscles and calming our brain activity. This disarms our façades and lessens our egos for a while, rendering us positive, more outgoing, and susceptible to new input. Furthermore, the endorphins make it easier for us to laugh and have fun. For that reason one’s body and mind are completely serene after laughing. This can be measured – and in fact it’s scientifically proven that laughter has a healing effect and that it also protects us against some deceases. Moreover, laughing prevents stress and strengthens our immune systems because of an increased production of white blood cells. Furthermore, a larger number of antibodies will be present in our systems after a laugh, and these help protect the body from viruses and bacteria. All these factors boost your level of well-being and counteract depression and anxiety. As you can see, it’s not going too far to call laughter the body’s own medicine and even though adults laugh less than kids, laughter remains a very important element in our lives and very important for our healthiness.

We go to a stand-up show to be entertained. We don’t have to say or do anything but sit and enjoy ourselves, and we intend to laugh unreservedly and wholeheartedly. This is where good stand-up enters the picture because, when effective, it lowers our defensive barriers and we, so to speak, let the comedian in. Humor works as an intellectual brain game. When a joke surprises us, we start laughing, and we’re most likely to be triggered in safe, social environments, places where we’re not afraid to give ourselves over to laughter. Here, the social part is important, as we rarely laugh when we’re by ourselves. This is because we’re genetically disposed to have more pleasant experiences in groups. Laughter shows openness to the persons around us, and it doesn’t have to be a response to a joke. In fact, only around 15 % of our laughs are. Because the purpose of laughter is primarily to support social relations, it’s also an important factor in the interaction between men and women. Besides openness, laughter signals acceptance of and intimacy towards the opposite sex. When men and women laugh together, women are, as a rule, more “audience-like” in their behavior than men. This might have something to do with human nature because making others laugh is, in some respects, a form of dominance over that person, and while people are, of course, different, women are usually attracted to domineering men and men generally prefer less domineering women. Studies show that some of the highest priorities for a woman looking for a boyfriend are humor and the ability to make her laugh. As mentioned, we use humor instinctively to try to dominate and to get attention. It’s therefore automatically more difficult for a man to laugh at another man than it is for a woman, particularly if this man doesn’t know the other man. This is because men in these cases have to let go of the unconscious self-control and be willing to, in a way, subject themselves to the dominance of another man. Women are, on the contrary, much more disposed to laugh at a man’s jokes. It gives them the opportunity to show their feminine side, attributes such as devotion and admiration, and that’s probably one of the reasons why there are more male stand-up comedians than there are female. Most women simply don’t have the same need to show publically that they’re able to dominate others. That being said, more and more female comedians are doing well and somehow the industry is catching up with the gender equality in our society. In general, an attention-grabbing woman is no longer very off-putting, and it’s now seen as more acceptable for females to be domineering.

When a man says that a woman has a good sense of humor, he often doesn’t think that she’s funny; he’s acknowledging that she tends to laugh at his jokes. Let’s try to give a short definition of the word: Having good humor means both to have the ability to pick up on jokes and to be funny to others. What constitutes good humor is, of course, subjective. Everybody has their own. What’s funny to one particular group is decided by the creative process between people with diverse proclivities, and the same goes for different subcultures and nations. To be able to share humor yields a sense of community in any group.

Stage fright

Before turning to the writing of stand-up itself, it seems natural to take a look at the most frequent barrier which must be overcome to be able to go on stage, namely that of stage fright.

You’ve probably heard about stage fright and presentation anxiety, both of which are to be scared of public speaking. Surveys have shown that everybody suffers from this fear; it’s something that we all deal with to some extent. So, in other words, it’s completely natural and normal to have stage fright. Many people think that being outgoing and being able to be self-confident on stage is an innate ability which can’t be taught – but that’s not true. To perform is all about learning how to take on your fears so that they don’t ruin your act. Many well-known comedians have experienced some degree of stage fright during their careers. Becoming comfortable with performing and/or speaking publically is something everybody needs to work at. The good news is that it’s very much possible to harness your fears by using some relatively simple techniques. Anybody can do it. It does, however, demand quite a bit of practice.

In order to learn how to deal with dread and anxiety, it’s key that we understand these basic feelings. When we know why our brains and bodies react the way they do we’re better equipped to do something about it in the future. In this section I’ll go over the three most common anxiety blocks we might encounter before or during a performance. One is the cognitive block – a mental blockade in your brain. Another is the emotional block – an embodied physiological reaction caused by your nerves. Thirdly and finally, there is the rhetorical block which hits when being conscious of your own deficiencies makes you nervous and unsure of yourself. Obviously, it’s not impossible to suffer from all three kinds simultaneously but most likely one of the blocks is more prevalent than the other two.

Cognitive block

This block takes place in your head, freezing your thoughts when you’re unable to let go of all the things you’re afraid might happen during your performance. Cognitive block amplifies negativity. It makes you feel insecure and nervous, and it initiates a self-critical inner dialogue the minute you decide to do stand-up. This treacherous inner voice comments on everything you’re thinking about and everything you’re doing while preparing for a show and, as the show approaches, it will grow more severe than ever. For some, this inner voice which attacks all the parts of yourself that you’re unsure about, becomes so loud, ruthless and hurtful that it’s outright terrible to live with. It might ask:

Do you really think that you’re funnier than the other comedians?

Everybody thinks you’re ridiculous!

Everybody will say that you’re a fool!

They won’t find you funny!

They won’t laugh at your jokes!

Who do you think you are to try to be somebody?

The other performers are much funnier than you.

Who do you think you are to go on stage and try to be funny?

Who ever said you were funny?

You will forget your jokes and your mind will go blank.

You will be yelled at by the audience!

Nobody will like you ever again after this performance!

This is what we might call the “who-do-you-think-you-are attitude”. What we demand of ourselves takes on inhuman proportions, and it becomes impossible to live up to our own expectations. Research has shown, however, that many comedians demand much more of themselves than the audience is actually likely to be expecting. Even for a seasoned stand-up comedian, it’s impossible to satisfy his subconscious but, thankfully, there are ways to prevent cognitive block from ruining your performance.

Beating cognitive block

The best way of trying to avoid this form of block is by identifying the destructive inner voice early on and putting the brakes on it before it gets going for real. When the voice starts speaking to you, negative thoughts and notions are stored in your subconscious mind and that can have a negative effect on its state. The subconscious has no filter to protect you from these thoughts so they will stay buried deep down, and later on some will surface, and when you become conscious of them, dread and fear, panic even, might ensue. This is why it’s so important to come to grips with your negative thoughts before they make it into the subconscious. This might be done effectively by responding to your own criticisms. Let’s say that you doubt your own ability to make an audience laugh, or that you’re convinced that you will make mistakes. The best way of handling that situation is to dismiss these thoughts entirely by saying out loud to yourself:

Of course you can’t make everybody laugh. That would be impossible. If I’m able to make part of the audience laugh, that’s enough.

Or:

It’s unreasonable to expect to be flawless. It’s only human to err, and why shouldn’t that be okay sometimes?

By having a conversation with your inner faultfinding critic, you can abort your negative thoughts. In time, the positive experiences you have will strengthen your belief in your worth as a stand-up comedian and that will give you the courage to stall, if necessary, and to make mistakes, as well as to attempt improvisation. Replacing negative thoughts with these positive experiences will alter your thought processes. Suddenly you feel free and might think:

They’re here to enjoy themselves!

They’re not here to judge me!

I like doing stand-up!

They’re willing to have fun!

My jokes are good!

They want me to succeed!

They’re not my enemies!

I love making them laugh!

They’re here to let my test my material!

I have nothing to fear. They’re regular people, just like me!

After a while, your subconscious will have gotten the message that this way of thinking produces more confidence and less stress. Your brain is most receptive to input when your body is relaxed, and pep talks that make you remember positive things will seep down into your subconscious, and eventually you will be able to stay calm. When reminding yourself of these positive things, it’s a good idea to sit down with your eyes closed and try to be completely relaxed while you repeat them over and over. Do so a couple of times a day, even if you find it a bit silly at first, and soon you will see that it really helps.

As I’ve already mentioned, your subconscious doesn’t have a filter which is why reality and visualization are processed much in the same way. So visualizing being on stage is a legitimately effective way to practice, and it has the potential to give you greater confidence and reduce your uneasiness. Imagine, in as much detail as possible, that you’re doing your stand-up show – and that everything is going well. Watch yourself on stage, totally in control, your body completely relaxed. Imagine how you enter, how you take the microphone, and imagine that you feel positivity emanating from happy faces. Look on as you command the stage and as the audience laughs at your jokes. The more details, the better.

Remember that doing a performance isn’t a matter of life and death. It’s not like you’re a heart surgeon. What’s the worst that could happen? There’s no need to be afraid of making a mistake – because we all do sometimes, you know. If you forget a joke or mess up on stage, it’s not the end of the world. Don’t demand too much of yourself. Being a perfectionist often proves very stressful. Instead, accept that you’re likely to make some mistakes and save your concerns for when you actually do, instead of worrying about in advance. There’s really no need to go to the same funeral twice, so to speak. If you do make a mistake, so be it! You will just have to take it from there and deal with the situation then. But who knows? Maybe the upcoming show that you’ve been dreading so much will turn out absolutely fine. And then you will have wasted a lot of energy needlessly.

Those who show up for stand-up are ordinary people. They’ve come to have a good time. They’re not reviewers or executioners or there to judge you. Should your show turn out to be less than stellar then at least you have learned something from the bad experience. So although it’s preferable to avoid mistakes, it’s actually, in a way, fruitful to make a few once in a while. Maybe just tell yourself that everything shall be forgotten a hundred years from now anyway. In that light, what does a bad show really mean? Nothing. Fortunately, our brains are better at retaining positive memories than bad memories, so if you pull off a good show, the audience will remember it. A less successful show, on the other hand, rather than going down in history, will soon be forgotten about. This is why you should relax and forgive yourself for making mistakes. When the thought of messing up doesn’t make you deeply concerned anymore, it’s also much easier to poke fun at what went wrong.

Emotional block

This type of block shows itself physically as you’re about to perform and during a performance. You may experience violent palpitations of the heart, cold sweats and your hands and/or legs might start shaking. The body is also capable of reacting with spasms such as a vibrating upper lip and other similar tics.

ऀTo be uncomfortable with speaking in public is a basic instinct. When we feel under pressure our body reacts the same way an animal’s body does when it feels threatened: We prepare ourselves for either fight or flight. This response ensures that our bodies are capable of producing large quantities of adrenaline whenever we perceive danger, preparing us to react to a particularly stressful situation. The sensation of adrenaline being pumped through our veins is part of what it is to feel nervous which means that it’s your body’s way of trying to prompt you to be ready for action. The exercises in this section will teach you how to improve your performances by taking control of your body’s responses.

Beating emotional block

In order to overcome this block you have to learn how to relax completely. It’s simply not possible to feel stressed out and relaxed at the same time, so knowing how to calm yourself down will neutralize stress and reduce the tenseness in your body. There are many meditation exercises out there that can help you to relax more or less instantly. What they have in common is being mindful of one’s breathing, as this is very effective. When we’re stressed out, we forget to breathe normally which results in a number of bodily sensations. When we breathe normally, we use most of our longue capacity so that sufficient oxygen is transported to our muscles. Interestingly enough, we react to stress by taking short, fast breaths because we somehow know that the right thing to do is to prepare our bodies for fight or flight.

Sometimes you might feel that you need to go to the bathroom when you’re nervous. This response has to do with evolution. Our biological disposition has evolved so that it reacts rationally in a dangerous situation. When it’s necessary to try to run for your life, you will be able to do it faster if you, shall we say, dispose of some superfluous mass. Emptying your bladder is, of course, a good idea to do before going on stage but unless you’ve ingested huge amounts of liquids within an hour of your performance, once ought to be enough, whatever your body may tell you.

ऀOur bodies react differently in unsafe situations. Many of these reactions are distractions when we’re about to do stand-up so when you feel nervous or sense other symptoms of stress coming on, it’s important to remember to take deep breaths and make sure to try to breathe diaphragmatically. It also helps to hold your breath for a few seconds before letting the air back out. Another method is to empty your lounges completely before taking a deep breath, making it possible for air to fill every part of them back up. If you’re not sure if you’re doing this correctly, try to put a hand on your own stomach, at your navel, while you breathe in. You will feel the diaphragm lifting, and as you breathe back out your belly will deflate. After trying this technique a few times you should be able to feel a noticeable effect.

ऀThe adrenaline won’t leave your body straightaway, and your hands may continue to shake. This is normal. Remember that adrenaline is actually produced for your benefit and, if you have its side effects under control, the extra clarity and speed it affords you are likely to improve your abilities. So try not to be afraid of the feeling of adrenaline. Instead, think of it as your body’s contribution to your presentation. Later on in the book, in the section about ‘Performance’, I’ll get into how to hide the little shakes of and tremors in your body that are sometimes inevitable.

ऀAnother way to defeat your emotional block is by reprogramming the reaction patterns of your body by gradually learning how not to react to stress. Eventually, some grow to be as relaxed in a stressful situation as they are in the shower. More on this in the section on ‘Practical exercises’.

Rhetorical block

This block hits when you feel that you might be lacking the experience or the skills to pull off a stand-up show. Most of those who are new to stand-up are likely to get rhetorical block at some point. It’s only natural that a lack of experience might cause you a bit of trouble and, as a comedian who isn’t fully fledged yet, it is of course a challenge to figure out how to write and deliver jokes as well as how to make the audience clap and laugh. You probably have presumptions about how to perform well but, no matter what, one should always tread lightly when one moves into new territory. A captivating introduction, an interesting performance overall and a solid conclusion, all these parts of a show need work and practice, and it’s often obvious to the audience who has a lot of experience and who’s just starting out.

Beating rhetorical block

Out of the three presentation blocks, this is the easiest one to get rid of. In fact, by the time you’ve finished this book, you will have come a long way, just by being aware of how much you have learned about stand-up. But, as I pointed out in the preface, plenty of practice is also needed in order to turn yourself into a skilled comedian. Metaphorically, I can supply you with the box of tools needed to construct a house but it’s you who is going to have to build it by yourself. Even the right tools can be used incorrectly, so that the house may turn out crooked and leaky, but having them at hand is the first step. The next house you work on is probably going to become finer than the previous one, as you learn from your mistakes and grow accustomed to using these new tools.

It’s also instructive to see others at work which is why watching a lot of stand-up is educational and, therefore, a good way to avoid rhetorical block. Watch the established professionals to see how it’s done and the up-and-coming comedians at the open mike events in part to learn from their mistakes. You will then start to get an idea about what works and what doesn’t work, and once you do it will be much easier for you to know how to write your own jokes and how the audience will respond to your delivery. The problem with looking over the shoulder of established comedians is that you might start thinking, “I’ll never become as good as him”. The divide between a professional and a novice is indeed so great that it can seem intimidating to dream of reaching their level. This is why I recommend mixing it up so that some of the shows you go to are done by comedians who started out around the same time you did. Then you will probably have the opposite experience sometimes, thinking: “I could do this equally well.” Or even: “I’m better than this!” This should give you a taste for getting on stage yourself. Also, notice that the audience is rather forgiving of inexperienced comedians and how, even if the show isn’t too great overall, they still laugh at the jokes they do find funny and applaud. That might give you the courage to try out more of your own stuff.

Wrapping up presentation blocks

A show often turns out less successful than you had hoped. When that happens, it sometimes makes you scared of doing another show, but remember that practice makes perfect – so don’t give up. If everything goes wrong, try to learn from your missteps, and tell yourself that the next show is sure to be more successful. Also, it’s best to get back on stage as soon as possible, in order to exorcise the fear of failure from your body.

Tell yourself that no stand-up comedian ever went pro without making a lot of mistakes. That’s the only way to improve. The audience won’t be judging you as a person for doing a bad stand-up show, and thankfully there is much more to life than being good at stand-up. So before you succeed with your shows, remember to give yourself credit for being brave enough to go up on stage in the first place. Few have the courage to do this.

ऀObserve how others who do stand-up are as nervous as you sometimes feel. Those familiar butterflies in your stomach are a common phenomenon. It might be helpful for you to recall how your nerves are always most frayed immediately before the show begins and that usually the butterflies disappear as soon you’re focused on the performance itself. Once you get started, it’s probable that you will have forgotten all about your nerves.

Studies have shown that one of the things making people most insecure about public speaking is that they think that it’s clear to everybody how nervous they are. The same studies have also shown that performers generally appear less nervous than they really are. This means that as long as you try to exude confidence, there’s a decent chance that they won’t pick up on how you really feel. This strategy is called “Fake it till you make it”. By “simply” pretending to be confident, you will automatically feel less insecure, so - whether faked or not - this approach is beneficial to your ability to perform. In time, as you shake off your stage fright for good, you won’t even have to “fake it” anymore, and by then the confidence will have become real.

Writing stand-up

Think of the process of developing material as a multistage rocket. In the first stage, you come up with ideas for topics or other kind of content for your show. In the second stage, you write jokes. In the third and final stage, you improve the writing by making the jokes funnier and more entertaining. This section teaches you how to do all of these things well, revealing the tips you need for writing better stand-up.

Material

There’s nothing you can’t do stand-up about but that doesn’t mean that it doesn’t matter which ideas you choose to work into your material. It does matter. Don’t expect the audience to care about subjects which you don’t find interesting yourself. As a rule, it’s best to talk about something that has piqued your interest or about something which annoys you. Putting some thought into what you choose to write about will not only be helpful throughout the development stage, it’s also much easier to perform material that you’ve been able to write with passion. On the other hand, if you turn too political, or if you tie every joke to a personal cause, your stand-up runs the risk of turning into a tiresome lecture of sorts. Ideally, your stand-up has a basis in the things you encounter and experience in daily life. Just make sure to make your material relatable so that you won’t lose the audience. Being self-deprecating, in order to show that you don’t take yourself too seriously and that you have a sense of irony, can be funny but take this route with caution as it can grow old relatively quickly.

Your material should be informed by many different things: experiences, thoughts and something you’ve read about or heard about. You’re a catalyst, filtering all the input in your life, discarding some things and transforming others into bits of material with stand-up potential. Write down your ideas immediately, even if you wait a while before developing them (explored in the sections ‘Writing down ideas’ and ‘Developing ideas’ further along in the book ->). Keep in mind that you’re a unique person – and try to make your material reflect that fact. If two comedians were to switch stand-up material, chances are that neither would be nearly as funny as when they were doing their own stuff. A comedian has his own voice, making it difficult to re-appropriate other people’s jokes on the spot.

ऀI recommend drawing on personal experience. Base your jokes on your own opinions and use the personal insights that you have. If you’re young, write about being young. If you’ve got children, write about becoming a father and about when your kid was born. If you collect garbage for a living, use that. One of the most common pitfalls when writing stand-up is to try to write about something you have no understanding of at all. Young comedians are often making references to things they don’t know anything about, and the jokes don’t work as well when audiences pick up on that. So, basically, stick to what you know. If you’re not updated on social issues or if you don’t have a lot to say yet about politics, relationships or sex, or whatever, then maybe it’s best to start out by writing about something else. Save those jokes for when you’ve formed your opinions and/or have more experience so that you won’t lose credibility. The problem isn’t so much that a joke might come off as misplaced or misguided; it’s more about being able to match your choice of material to audience members. An older crowd will look straight through you if you stray beyond your own frame of reference but they might be able to connect with your observations about your own life, in spite of the age difference. Everybody remembers what it was like growing up and being young.

Doing stand-up where you draw on personal experience doesn’t mean that you have to make jokes about yourself and your own life, though. Instead, you may include material that has universal appeal such as observations about everyday life. As mentioned, try to include some of the things that interest or annoy you in your material, and do some research so that you grow to know a lot about these particular subjects. The audience is likely to respond to a comedian who can inform them about something interesting. If you, for instance, tell them that your bike was just stolen then make sure to elaborate on this incident and provide the audience with more specific details.

An example of a bit containing facts, punchline and a tagline:

[Setup] There exist around one million bicycles in Copenhagen. Out of those, 18.000 are stolen every year. That’s approximately 2 per cent. So why did it have to be mine? [Punchline] Why couldn’t it have been someone else’s? [Setup for tagline] What do I have to do to avoid getting my bike stolen? Stop driving around on a 3.000 dollar bike? Stop parking in crime-infested areas? [Tagline] Put a lock on it?

Although one shouldn’t tailor one’s material to whichever audience you might expect at a certain show, it might nevertheless be a good idea to keep those expectations in mind (explored further in ‘Knowing your audience’->). Some references might not be appropriate for that particular audience. If your jokes are centered on the teenagers of today, as opposed to being a teenager in general, it’s perhaps doubtful that these jokes will draw many laughs from a crowd full of old people, and so on. Therefore, spend some time sorting your material before going on stage. Make sure not to alienate a large section of the audience members – or to risk losing them entirely. This is bound to happen if few of your references are broad. An audience member who’s unable to understand your jokes will, of course, hardly find them very funny.

When performing, always bring your very best material and save the rest for open mikes. In time, you will be able to put enough great material together to fill a 25-30 minutes set. A set of your best material is known as a “club set”. It will take you a while to produce one but once it’s ready, once your club set is tried and tested, it will be so much easier and less intimidating for you to perform.