"I tripped him and he found a twenty, Dol, that's not bad luck, that's fortune."
    Dol's eyes rolled. "Ivbi, it was an accident. You can't blame yourself for the machinations of fate. What'd Golgolol say?"
    "'All luck's bad luck from the right angle', yes, I remember." Ivbachanak said. 
    "It's not just that, though." He said. "You know they only gave me this guy because I swore I'd do better. I mean, last time was... pretty bad."
    "Yep." Dol popped the 'p' obnoxiously. "The last person you possessed got elected Pope."
    Ivbachanak put his face in his hands and sighed. 

    The problem wasn't that Ivbi was a bad demon. Ivbi could do the fire and brimstone, moving shadows, creepy noises in the night schtick. Smoke, weird smells, desecration of religious paraphernalia? Piece of cake. Ivbi had the 'moving inanimate objects and scaring the shit out of people' thing down. Ivbi could give lectures to lesser demons about the fine art of being a scary supernatural being.
    It was the practical application of the supernatural on people that Ivbi had trouble with.

    Ivbi's host's name was Michael Christiansson, and if that wasn't a sign Ivbi didn't know what was.
    It went like this: Ivbi caused a power outage, forcing Michael to take his laptop down the street to a human cafe, where he proceeded to spill his coffee on his computer, a waitress, a very expensive shirt, and his shoes. It had seemed like definite points for evil, it'd looked like the start of a very bad, no good, extremely satisfying calamitous day. 
    And then Michael went to get his computer fixed, and all Ivbi's hard work went down the drain.
    The tech was cute. At least, Michael thought they were cute - and the tech thought Michael was cute, and that his stories about his mishaps were cute, and that Michael warranted a phone number. 
    And a date. Which Ivbi tried to ruin by setting off the sprinklers in the building, only to inspire a 'kissing in the rain' moment. They were inside, it totally didn't count.
    The second date was better - Ivbi got Michael to choke on a fishbone, but Cute Tech knew the correct way to heimlich someone, and Michael thought they were 'dreamy' once he wasn't gasping. 

    The tenth date was a catastrophe. Cute Tech liked Michael's attempts at cooking - and almost burning down his apartment - and thought the cats Ivbi herded through the window were 'adorable'. They liked talking to Michael's mother when she called during sex, and they liked his angry Italian neighbor getting into a fight with his equally angry Irish neighbor at three in the morning.
    "Your apartment has character." They said.
    Ivbi had shook his fist at the sky

    "They're getting married!" Ivbi complained a year later, cheek against the cafe table. Dol laughed and Ivbi sighed. There was no justice for evil doers.