Possum.

 

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Origins : 1

In a big mansion, owned by the legendary scientist. One day, he trimmed the bushes. He went back inside yet to hear his gardener screaming in a bloodcurdling rage. The scientist, named kole walked outside to find his gardener screaming his head off for no apparent reason, screamed “What.. Is.. this..” oddly calm. Kole said “a bush?” The gardener took out his tape measure, put it on the bush and yelled “IT’S NOT PERFECT” Kole takes stuff like this very personally and cuts the bush ‘perfectly’, to the gardeners standards. The gardener inspected the bush like a detective. Kole says “good?” The gardener said “perfe-“ The bush started to rattle. They looked at each other and Kole stuck his hand in the bush and opened the bush to reveal a purple portal. The portal set fire to the surrounding bush but the flames were a sharp purple and didn’t burn the bush, just stuck to the twigs. A big red beam of light that glowed, when it flew out you just could sense the energy radiating from the laser beam. It went right through kole and he fell to the ground, shrinking into 5’2. His hair grew , his ears grew and he floated up to the portal and went in. The portal turned into a ‘L’ and exploding, killing the gardener and destroying the bush. Kole floated into a chair, still in a deep sleep and a large needle floated into his head. Kole woke up to see a tall, what looked like a teenager full of grease and sweat. Kole said “who are you?” The sweat-bag turned and said “Ryan. Who are you?” Kole just looked and said “no idea. A gnat?” Ryan just smirked and said smugly “You’re Loopoop. The legendary wizard” loopoop turned and said “How am I supposed to be a wizard when I can’t remember anything?” Ryan put up one finger and pushed a button. Loopoop immediately fell asleep and got a rude awakening by a slap in the face. Loopoop said “Ryan.. Jesus” Ryan looked and said “stop dying you filthy frank rippoff” Loopoop smiled and said “It doesn’t offend me, it’s just truth you wiggling adolescent globe”. Ryan shed a tear.

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Possum trouble : 2

 Loopoop walked down the road waiting for trouble, he’s a well wanted demon. He spots a possum, and then another and then another. Now there’s a weird amount of possums surrounding the area. Ryan jumps out and hands Loopoop a silver duck, saying “Take this, you will need it” and then hides in the bushes again. A small possum jumps out of the bushes, wearing a crown and being lifted by two possums. “Jake Paul is good” the possum says in a deep voice. “Join us and unlock the true secret to happiness” Loopoop grimaced and said, “so what is that jake Paul?” The possum king looks and says quietly “maaaybe???”. Loopoop pulls out a gold pistol and shoots with a purple fire bullet. The possum just has no head now. The possums run away and all shout “we will have vengeance, see possum movie two” Loopoop realised the fourth wall break and shot most of the possums. He felt a sharp pain and started feeling weird. Loopoop looked down and found he had been shot, too weak to process the red feathers on the tranquilliser dart. He felt odddddddd................

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Salted melons : 3

 He woke up to see a boy, older than him but still odd. With the dart still in his system, he was still light headed but making out pictures of melons on the walls, and a lot of superhero and star wars collectibles. Loopoop passed out again and woke up all fresh. He said “what’s your name and why have you kidnapped me” he said “I’M A MELON” like lemon man from Francis of the filth. Loopoop realised that he was a fruit man, only saying I’m a fruit but of intellectual kind. Loopoop cast a vocal cord spell and he said “I’m melonhead. Head of the resistance. I’m the only one in the resistance actually”Loopoop said “ so.. the anti jake paulers ?” Melonhead nodded. Melonhead said “beware NEN” Loopoop didn’t know exactly what NEN was but he knew it was bad and it would happen. Melonhead also said “I attached something to the bed and you in this room. You can’t leave now. Loopoop stood up and walked out of the room and when Melonhead tried to get him back, he was shackled to the bed. Loopoop made his gun float and shot the chains that Melonhead was attached to. Before Melonhead could thank him, there was a loud thud outside and they rushed down to check what the nose was. There was a possum with a silver wire wrapped around his head and he said “ I am the possum lord. We no longer support jake Paul. We suppport your death Loopoop, you killed our leader and we will kill you now.” Loopoop remembered that he had the silver duck that Ryan gave him   And he had a vision. He put the duck on the ground and it exploded like a flashbang. He shook and returned from his vison, and used the duck as intended. Most of the possums died but the possum lord held up a gold duck, put it down and left, the duck left a green residue on the ground but when they looked up, the possums had left. They got some of the green residue and tested it. It was highly poisonous and the molecular buildup looked like this; Ŷøüśûçk.

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Glooten : 4

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