Choke me with this silent distance

I will use the scissors you give me

to turn around

and cut the strings

from my wrist to yours

He held me close to his side

rigid

you hold me at arm's length

Can my heart take this?

This distortion?

Being cages then no leash at all

When all I want is to be close

to you

Full to the brim with worry

Still, I am starving on paper

Confusing angst with love

your past tells me it will call you back

whispering threats of backtracks 

in my bad ear

My own story dances in my good ear

Ishmael kicks me while I am down

Please, please, please, please, please 

leave me

I cannot take this