Babe 82


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Chapter 1

"Aubrey Leigh Reed! Get your ass out of bed now!" Aubrey groaned and slammed her hand down on the clock before realizing it wasn't in fact the clock talking to her.

"Can I not go to school today and just sleep? Please! I do most of my learning outside of school anyway!" She shouted to the door, knowing that her mom just went down the hall to wake up her little brother, Evan. He's thirteen. 

"Goddammit, Aubrey! Just get up and go to school! Do I really have to get your father to make you get up? Do I need to get a jug of cold water and pour it on your bed?" 

Needless to say, she got out of bed pretty quickly. Snatching her bra off the floor, she quickly latched the hooks and spun it around, sliding the straps up her shoulders. Dashing to the closet, she snatched her favourite red graphic tee off of the hanger and slipped it over her head. Running over to the dresser, she grabbed her stretchy, black jeans, and as she was still pulling the jeans over her butt, she opened her door and ran into the bathroom across the hall.

"Aubrey! I have to go to the bathroom!" Evan shouted, banging his fist on the door.

"Evan! Holy shit, we have three bathrooms in this house! Go in another one!" Aubrey shouted, pulling out her foundation and facial primer before glaring at the door when the banging didn't stop. 

"Mom! Aubrey won't let me take a shit!" My brother screeched, and she rolled her eyes.

"Evan! You are thirteen years old; you don't get to swear. Go to another bathroom. Jesus Christ, you're aging me before my time. Stop fighting and get ready!" her mom hollered and Aubrey smirked, looking into the mirror. Then she stopped smirking. Damn... she looked like shit.

Oh well! Who was she trying to impress?

Danny Tanner.

Glowering at her self-conscious through the mirror, she put two squirts of foundation into her hands and half-heartedly slathered it around her face. Grabbing her concealer, she covered her eyes that seemed to be purple from her insomnia. Gazing in the mirror, she put some lip balm on her slightly chapped lips and then quickly swiped mascara over her blonde eyelashes. 

Viewing her hair sullenly, she realized there wasn't much she could do to fix her untamable hair. Wild curls bent in every direction was not her idea of a good hair day, though many would disagree. Sighing, she grabbed several hair ties and she bunched up her unkempt hair into a high bun. Securing it with the second hair tie, she sighed and gazed at the mirror. 

"Aubrey! You no longer have time for breakfast! You know, for someone so smart, you really can be a dumb ass," she said, opening the bathroom door. Glaring at her mother, Aubrey grimaced again and shook her head before exiting the bathroom.

Running down the stairs, she ran to the kitchen to grab her lunch. She forgot her backpack upstairs.

"Shit," she shouted, leaving her lunch on the counter. 

"Aubrey! Stop swearing!" Her mom yelled at Aubrey promptly as she ran past her mother and back up the stairs. Going back into Aubrey's bedroom, she snatched her bag off of the floor. Dashing down the stairs, she grabbed her lunch and ran out the front door.

"Love you, Mom!" Aubrey shouted, slamming the front door shut. 

Sprinting down the hill, her backpack uncomfortably bounced on her back, making her feel awkward and bulky. Her lunch bag (which literally was a brown paper bag) was starting to rip and the school bus was about to go past her stop. 

"Mother of all things unholy," she muttered, huffing in exertion. She growled as she swung her backpack onto her back. Holding her lunch with both hands, she prevented it from ripping further and grumbled under her breath.

The bus stopped, and the door swung open revealing a smirking bus driver. He was an older man with greying hair and a receding hairline, but he was honestly so funny. She remembered in elementary school, they'd sing SpongeBob Square Pants the entire ride on repeat to annoy certain people. To this day that certain person can only tolerate SpongeBob. She gave him SpongeBob stickers and a Valentine's Day card in fifth grade, and since then, he always teased her about getting a matching set of stickers. Asshole.

Glaring up at Gerry, the bus driver, he grinned good-naturedly back at her.

"I just wanted to see you run this morning." He laughed, and her face blossomed with colour. She pouted, and felt a crease appear on her forehead. 

"Meanie," she said before going to her regular seat. In the back row, the bus clan was snickering at her expense, making her frown turn... well obviously not upside down. It only increased.

"Hey, Babe. You can stop running after your dreams. I'm right here," Danny Tanner said, running his hands up and down the length of his body in a suggestive manner.

"You're my nightmare." Aubrey smirked, sitting in her seat. Footsteps sounded behind her, and she turned around with narrowed eyes. It was Danny. 

"Damn girl, you remind me of a green bottle because I want to Mount and Do you!" 

"Danny. The only thing you'll be mounting is a horse." She snorted, and his friends in the back of the bus just laughed. He frowned, but then smirked.

"Don't call yourself that. But you know what? If you're into bestiality, then that's cool; I don't judge." He leaned closer. "In fact, I like a girl that knows what they want." He winked, and she felt her mouth drop. She squawked and went to drive her fist into his face, but he went back to his friends at the end of the bus, laughing. 

Fuming in her seat, she grabbed her black beats by Dr. Dre and drowned out the world with her music. Staring at the mountains immediately before the bus, she sighed in happiness. Snow covered the ground and she realized then that she didn't bring her coat in her rush to get on the bus. 

This is going to be a long day.

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Chapter 2

The obnoxious school bell rang in her ears, and as she glared up at the ceiling, she dropped her binder for the one and only class she actually enjoyed. She had four blocks in one school day, and the courses switch order every day, rotating through four possible schedules.

Bending over, she quickly retrieved her binder and as she did so, whistles erupted behind her. A moment of rage passed through Aubrey before she smoothed over her face and slowly stood up, wiggling her butt as she did so. Turning around slowly and methodically, she gave the boys a once over and sneered. Scowling, she walked away after slamming her locker shut.

"Hey, Babe 82." Aubrey heard a soft voice in her ear and she blanched, although secretly, she enjoyed his presence. 

"Hey, Danny," she whispered back in the exact same tone. "And it's Aubrey to you." Whipping around, she saw a crowd of rowdy guys surrounding her. 

"To what do I owe the pleasure of the bus clan?" She asked, sarcasm dripping from her voice. A soft laugh rumbled in Danny's throat and she took the moment to check him out... Goddamn. She wished he weren't so attractive. She wanted to hate him... she wanted to hate him so bad.

A knowing grin twisted his lips and he reciprocated her action. Shamelessly, his eyes zeroed in on her chest, but as she was aware, he would argue and say he was reading the graphic tee. As if. Snickers erupted in the hallway behind her and she winced when she saw her best friend, Imogen, giving her "the look". 

Before Aubrey could gesture for Imogen to help her, Imogen walked into the English classroom. Of course... she's no help at all. Rolling her eyes, Aubrey returned her attention to Danny who was smirking at her with slightly narrowed pale blue eyes.

"You just got thrown to the wolves," he murmured, chuckling in amusement.

His auburn hair was sticking every which way and she couldn't help but wonder how soft his hair was. It looked like he just got out of the shower because his hair seemed to be slightly damp on the bottom layer; the ends curled ever so slightly.

"Like what you see?" he asked and leaned forward, but he was still a respectful distance away. It was then that he stepped forward again and she felt her walls go up. He just got too close for comfort. 

Aubrey scoffed and looked at him with a teasing glint in her eye. She caught the eyes of his best friend Michael whose hair was far too long and was in desperate need of a haircut. 

"Not a chance in hell. You need to try far harder than that, Danny." 

"She looks great in red, hey?" Adrian nudged Danny and Aubrey noticed that the slightest amount of pink made its way to his cheeks.

"...Yeah," he finally muttered making his friends laugh and pound on his back.   

"Hey, hey, Aubrey. I'll be Burger King and you'll be McDonald's. I'll have it my way and you'll be loving it!" Adrian shouted, making the remainder of people in hall abruptly look over. Feeling her face start to heat up, Aubrey grumbled under her breath about hating fast food before she sped walk into the English classroom.

Rushing forward, Aubrey pulled out her chair and slumped beside Imogen who was smirking at her. Imogen snickered at her face and she pursed her lips before pulling out her laptop and looking up Tumblr relationship goals.

Other than Imogen, Aubrey had three other close friends, but she was the type of person to be super isolated except for those around her that had the pleasure of knowing her in day care. Adrian was one of them... but they drifted apart. The chair beside her squealed in protest and her mouth dropped when she saw Danny deposit his fine posterior in the chair to her left.

"Do you just like to aggravate me?" she snarled, leaning back in her chair with her arms crossed over her chest. He was about to retort when the teacher hobbled to the front of the class. He grinned at the class and immediately every one shut up. He's honestly one of the only good teachers in the school. 

"Okay, okay, settle down. I have an announcement. Since we're talking about classic world literature..." the class snickers and she scowled. She loved literature. How dare they mock it? She felt Danny's eyes on her profile and she turned her head to meet his eyes head on. His eyes held mischief, but she was sure her eyes relayed the exact same thing. 

"—So keep that in mind." Aubrey's gaze snapped to the front of the class and she gaped at the teacher. His gaze lingered on Aubrey and Danny before he smiled.

"Aubrey! Can you tell us what we're doing?" She flipped her curly blonde hair over her shoulder, whipping Danny in the face in the process and grinned. He scowled and his friends snickered and held up a pad of gold star stickers. She really couldn't believe they're fifteen and sixteen. They act like they're still in kindergarten, never mind sophomores.

"That I can, Sir! We are listening to you give out the instructions for our next project," she replied. It was a very safe answer and Mr. Grimer knew it.

"Yes, yes... but what is the project?" Aubrey paused and she felt her face heat up.

"It has something to do with the great writers of Canada?" She threw her fist in the air to solidify her point, but her answer was wrong, and the class erupted in laughter. 

"Okay. Who can tell Aubrey what we're doing since she thought Danny was more interesting," Mr. Grimer said, looking around the room. 

Once again, students all around us were laughing, staring at her and Danny. Her school, Banff Community High School, had maybe three hundred students and they all grew up together. Everyone basically knew where everyone lived, though they used to be closer.

"Imogen! Why don't you enlighten your best friend?" Imogen tried her best at a scowl, but failed miserably. She grinned at Aubrey and channeled her latest character in drama class.

"All righty, Sir Grin-a-lot! Aubrey," she turned to Aubrey and made a big show of taking a huge inhalation, "we are writing a children's book with a partner. It must have a storyline intelligent enough for sophomores, and it must have illustrations. Is that all of it or did I miss anything...?" she questioned herself, looking around the room before she gasped again and added, "It will have to be worked on during your own time, and we have a month to finish it because it's worth fifteen percent!" She grinned at Mr. Grimer and he nodded, satisfied with her spiel.

"I want Aubrey!"

"Aubrey; be my partner!"

"You write books! Aubrey, you'll obviously want me because I can draw amazing stick people!"

"Dude... you can't even draw a penis right."

At that last comment, Aubrey snorted and turned around in her chair to see Alex, one of the five members of the bus clan, smirking at Adrian. Giving Alex a grin, she turned to Adrian and smirked. 

"That's right. Your drawings are anatomically incorrect. It looks like a baseball bat with two baseballs that aren't even attached to the shaft of the penis." Aubrey snorted and Adrian's eyes narrowed.

"How would you know?" he asked challengingly. She had all the proof she needed. Shuffling through her binder, Aubrey grabbed several different tests. Holding them up for him to see, he turned scarlet and shut up. When the teacher designated a marker for every test, Adrian was Aubrey's  marker. He drew a penis on every single page. What an immature ass hat. 

 "Actually, I have assigned your partners. I purposely did this to encourage you to mingle with other people." The class groaned.

"Really? You're assigning partners?" A girl named Emma groaned and Mr. Grimer laughed.

"That's right. Now, because I'm feeling generous, I will let you have your wish, Aubrey. Seeing as you and Mr. Tanner were so chatty and chummy, you two will be the first pair." 

The class roared with laughter, and Aubrey felt a piece of paper fall down her shirt. Someone tugged on a coil of hair, and she slapped their hand away in frustration. Reaching into the front of her shirt, she unfolded the paper to see a diagram. Adrian really was a shitty drawer.

"What the shit is that supposed to be?" Aubrey asked, frowning and squinting at the page. 

"Oh, wait, that's writing. Right," she said, trying to decipher the alien code from above. Danny, who was grinning at her, snatched the page out of her hand and crumpled it in his hand. "Hey! That's mine!" Aubrey yelped, trying to reach for it. Smirking, he shoved his hand down his pants and the paper note — along with his hand — disappeared out of view. Wrinkling her nose in disgust, she turned her nose up into the air.

"Never mind. I'm not interested anymore," Aubrey said, turning away and looking at Imogen. She was biting her lip and Aubrey could tell the effort Imogen was putting in not to just crawl up into a ball on the floor and sign her own death certificate stating that she legitimately died of laughter.

"Danny Tanner! Get your hand out of your pants. Give me the note. The class will be very interested to know what this ruckus is all about." It was then that Aubrey realized everyone was staring at Danny and where his hand was located. Lifting his hand from out of his pants, he brought the paper out with it and tossed it at the teacher.

"By all means, Mr. Grimer. Read it aloud. Aubrey couldn't read it anyways. Maybe you'll have more success at deciphering Adrian's... lovely font." Danny smiled dubiously as Mr. Grimer smoothed out the paper. Clearing his throat, he smirked at the page and his eyes rose to meet Adrian's.

"Did you learn how to write?" Adrian squawked indignantly and huffed, crossing his arms over his chest.

"Please, I was writing with my bad side. I have to practice incase sometime in my lifetime someone chops off my right hand. I am merely expanding my horizons," Adrian said, spreading his arms like SpongeBob does when saying imagination. Mr. Grindr cleared his throat and began to read Adrian's note... with difficulty.

"Yeah... yup? Oh... no, it says yay... maybe... Aubrey Leigh Reed plus Danny Noël Tanner will happen. Aubranny 4 evr..." He arched an eyebrow and looked at the class. "Oh, wait! There's more. It says p.s. maybe it should be Danbran. Or Danbrey! I will be the godfather of your... Okay then," he muttered making Adrian blush profusely. "What is this? Shipping? That's so tragic. I thought you all had more brain cells. Although, maybe that thought was too wishful of thinking. The class average of the latest test was an astoundingly low sixty-one percent." He rambled on, smiling jubilantly at the class. He grabbed a stack of papers and began calling people's names for each of them to collect their own.

"Aubrey Reed... Danny Tanner... Imogen Penny..." Aubrey meandered to the front of the class and grinned when she saw her mark. 98%. Danny looked at her score and his mouth dropped before he scowled. 

"Know it all," he muttered and Aubrey scoffed and met his eyes.

"No I'm not. Have you seen me in science or math? Eesh." She shuddered at the thought of those classes.

"All righty! Chop-chop, children! Get to work with your partners. This is the only class time you'll get in the next month. Everything else will have to be done in your own time."

Looking to the side, she saw Danny grinning, leaning on the desk. She rolled her eyes and when he went to retort, his arm slipped from the desk and he crashed to the floor. 

Clutching her stomach, Aubrey let out a laugh and regarded his blushing form, which currently was lying haphazardly on the tiled floor. Letting out a piteous moan, he changed his position into a yoga position as if to say, "I meant to do that."

Maybe there are worse things in the world than working on a project with Danny Noel Tanner.

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Chapter 3

Growling in frustration, Aubrey sighed and raked a hand through her unruly, blonde curls. Scowling, she gazed at the clock that seems to be moving backwards instead of forwards. Danny smirked at her and continued doodling on their homework-planning sheet.

"Can you stop drawing dicks and just focus, Danny?" she snarled as he added pubes to the picture.

She took back what she said. This is going to be the worst of all her high school experiences and there are quite a number of devastating events that decorate that list.

"Aubrey? Chill the fuck out," Adrian said, resting his hand on the back of her chair. Turning her head to the side, Aubrey's eyes zeroed in on the hand that seemed to be getting closer to her shoulder.

"Don't touch me," she warned and Adrian held his hands up in surrender.

"Meow," he purred and he even held a hand out in an imitation of a paw. "But seriously? Just chill out. He's just practicing—" Adrian didn't get to finish that sentence due to the fact that Danny smacked him hard with the back of his hand.

"Aubrey? You're good at writing. Me? I suck at writing and you've shot down every idea I have had, and it's not because I haven't been trying," Danny pointed out.

"That would be because you have given ideas fit for a preschooler. Seriously? First, you wanted our story to be about a donkey named Gerard who had a nasty habit of farting in front of his lady donkey friend—that's quite like our situation, is it not? —And then you wanted to make a story about a pencil named Tyrone, who wanted to be an eraser. What even...?"

"Fine, then you can do it on your own," he scowled and leaned back in his chair.

"Daniel Noël Tanner. If I do this entire project on my own, I swear to everything holy and unholy I will make your life a living hell on earth," she snapped and all of a sudden she was overly aware that the entire room was not only silent, but watching the exchange with hidden—or not so hidden—amusement.

"You two already fight like a married couple," Mr. Grimer remarked, making the class erupt into hysterics. Scowling still, Aubrey clenched her pencil tightly between her fingers.

"I can already see who will be wearing the pants in this relationship." Adrian snickered and at that, a surge of pressure exploded in her hand and the pencil snapped. Danny eyes widened at the broken pencil in her hands and Adrian slapped his knee before throwing his head back in a boisterous guffaw.

"Danny? I'd do what the lady says. You're about to be sent to the doghouse, and you aren't even married yet." Michael laughed, strolling forward to stand beside Adrian.

"Mr. Grimer? Can we go to the library or something so we can actually work on something instead of providing a makeshift reality TV episode for all to watch?" Aubrey asked in annoyance and he nodded his head.

"Danny, let's go," she muttered while she collected all of her stuff. He, however, did not move a muscle. Instead, he smirked at her and he put his hands behind his back.

"I don't know... I don't really like taking orders from girls..." He snickered, and her face blossomed with colour.

"You can't say sexist crap like that without expecting repercussions. Now, let's go." He sighed and shrugged before grabbing his backpack from the back of his chair. Standing beside her, she was painfully aware that he was way taller than her.

"Why do you wear heels?" he asked suddenly, looking down at her feet. Aubrey shrugged and made her way out of the classroom. Walking down the hallway to the library that could hardly be called a library, she looked behind her to see Danny shamelessly checking her out.

"See something you like?" Aubrey asked with a snort and shook her head.

"Yes," he retorted and she raised an eyebrow. That's new.

"Too bad. It's off limits." Aubrey smirked and when she looked back to see his expression, she saw only confusion.

"Since when is this brownie off limits?" he asked, gazing down at the chocolate in his hand. Damn... that burns. Realization lit up his features and a smug expression spread across his lips.

"Oh. You thought I was talking about you? Sorry, babe. I prefer brunettes," he bit out and Aubrey gave him a noncommittal shrug.

"You also like girls who are willing to drop their pants for you. Everyone here bores you. Tell me; have you found a girl that is actually worth sticking around for?" Aubrey asked and Danny suddenly stopped walking.

"Yes, actually, I have. Now, I'm bored with this conversation. Let's just get this over with." He sighed and brushed past her. Entering the library, she gave the librarian—Adrian's mom—a nod and then moved past Danny who seemed to be lost in the small, barely-qualifying-as-a-library room.

"Over here," she muttered and he nodded, following her.

Pulling out a chair, they sat across from each other. Handing him one of her pens, she sighed and shook her head and started jotting out ideas. In the centre of the page, she wrote out the words target audience: children and then drew a circle around it. From there, she webbed out different things that appeal to them. Looking over at Danny, she saw he had his phone out.

Snatching it from his unsuspecting hands, she put it in her pocket and tapped the page in front of him. Growling in annoyance, he swept a hand through his hair and started tapping the pen on the table.

"Danny! Just do your work and I will relieve you from my evil clutches!" Aubrey scolded, and he looked at her with a blank expression. The said device started making noises and she looked down at the screen to see a sordid message from none other than Adrian. Scowling, she shut the screen off and slid it back into her pocket away from Danny's eyes.

R u on Ur way 2 boning her?

"You, my good Sir, have a very questionable taste in friends," she said with an arched eyebrow after several moments of letting the message sink in. Danny smirked at that and in return also cocked a brow.

"Oh?" he asked with a small smile, and he leaned forward across the table closer to Aubrey.

"Yes. You have a rather troublesome message waiting for you from Adrian. It has to do with me," she said, hiding a smile.

"Hmm, what did the message say, then?" he asked, playing along. Keeping a straight face, she looked down at the screen and looked up at him with partially hidden amusement.

"I'll let you read it for yourself. When you do your part." She smirked and the playful look on his face was gone. Instead, he was now pouting at her and giving the puppy dog stare.

"While that face might score you a one-way ticket to Easy-Ville, it takes a lot more than that to win me over, Danny," she mused, and he frowned.

"Everyone likes puppies," he murmured, and she scoffed.

"I like cats more," she retorted, and his pale blue eyes narrowed. Aubrey actually adored puppies, but he didn't need to know that. 

"You hate cats, Aubrey," he said, and she froze. How did he know that?


They sat in comfortable silence as the minutes ticked onward; at least until an obnoxious butt-belch sound occurred. Scrunching her eyebrows together, she looked up at Danny who in turn was snickering. Rolling her eyes, she went to pull up her shirt to cover her nose, but then she remembered she was wearing a low-cut red tank top.

Danny seemed to realize this too because he leaned back and continued to snigger at her expense. 

Taking his page in his hands, he started to rip up the page into small pieces. He then proceeded to roll them up into little balls. Grinning at her like an idiot, he started pelting the paper pieces down her shirt. Eye twitching, she tried to feel annoyed, but to be honest she was completely amused. There were worse things in the world than having your crush throw paper down your shirt as an excuse of improving his aim, she thought amusedly.

Eventually, it got to the point where she actually started giggling. His aim was horrible. She almost felt bad for it.

"You know, for one who does so many sports, you'd think that you succeed in the ordinary task of throwing paper down a girl's shirt," she said dryly, making a faint blush spread across his pale skin.

"It's not my fault you have small boobs," he responded, and she spluttered. Arching an eyebrow, she looked down her shirt and then back up at him. His blushing red face was adorable, and she knew without a doubt he was just teasing her.

"You wouldn't know big boobs if they were staring you in the face then," she said with a smirk.

"Of course I do," he said, pointing at her chest.

"Do you know how bra sizing even works?" She asked, and he shrugged.

"Of course I do." Feeling an idea bloom in her mind, she leaned forward and rested her chin on her hand. Danny regarded her warily, unsure of what she was doing. 

"So, since you're a male and a self-proclaimed bra-sizing-messiah, what size do you think I am?" Aubrey asked, and he blinked.

"You see, I'd have to see them in order to be entirely accurate." He smirked and she snorted. He was so smooth.

"How about this? I will give you your phone back if you can guess my bra size." Danny stared unabashedly at her chest. He leaned forward and he looked like he wanted to poke it.

"A size Z," he said after a moment, and she snorted and shook her head.

"You have no idea how bra sizing works," she said and he smirked.

"I have no idea how bra sizing works," he agreed, nodding his head. Rolling her eyes, Aubrey leaned back in her seat, arching her back over the edge of the chair. She felt his gaze and she looked down to see her shirt showing a portion of her lacy black bra. Hastily covering the material, she sat up straight in her chair and tried not to blush. 

"In bra sizing, there's a number and a letter. The number refers to how many inches the circumference of your chest is and the letter is how big the cup is." Cocking his head to the side he blatantly stared at her chest once more. With speculative eyes, he grinned suddenly and looked back up at her.

"Is it in the thirties?" he asked; she inclined her head with a lopsided grin. This is too funny, she thought to herself.

"Are you a 32?" he asked and she pursed her lips. Shaking her head side to side, he hissed through his teeth and tapped his chin with a long finger.

"A 36?" 


"Then you have to be a 34." He snapped his fingers, and when she nodded he gave her a wink. He looked mighty proud of himself. 

"Okay, and cup size?" He frowned and leaned closer across the table once more.

"A D-cup?" he asked; she bit back a smile.


"Bigger or smaller?" She shrugged.

"Okay, well then. I'm guessing bigger. Are you a DD?" She leaned forward, and her top fell slightly in a tantalizing manner. His eyes immediately zeroed in. His ears began to get red, and she bit her lip in a suppressed smile.


"What's bigger than a DD?"

"Figure it out." The bell rang, and she chuckled at his lost expression. Standing up, Aubrey cocked her hip out and sat into her hips with one knee bent. Leaning over the table slightly, she smirked and winked at him.

"Our deal still stands. You'll get your phone when you can guess." She laughed and picked up all of her stuff in a single sweep. Blowing him a kiss over her shoulder, she noted that his mouth was parted in disbelief. 

"Keep the pen, Danny." 

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