Climbing to the top of the lush, green clfftop, an oak tree sat twisted and contorted toward the edge of the cliff. A single wooden swing hung from the thick branch that curved toward the precipice. I reached the swing and ran one hand across it. Glancing toward the sky I could see nothing but clouds, interrupted only by a cluster of a five golden birds that flitted by. I sat on the swing and observed my surroundings. Nothing but sky stretched all around me. There was nowhere I could run. I was at my final obstacle. A light breeze swayed the swing and I could feel myself tilting backward. I watched as dead leaves caught in the wind and spiralled down. I thought back to myself as a child; rushing to the swing, screeching to go higher and wanting to reach out and grab the sun.

Holding each side of the swing, I began to rock back and forth, lifting and tucking my legs. My eyes followed the falling leaves as the swing gained more and more height. I could hear the distant tweeting of the birds as my gaze fell back below me. I could finally see past the cliff edge into the vast depth. The light blurred into the dark, and the falling leaves spiralled into nothingness. I could so easily drop into the nothingness, but I’ve already done that. My life was the vast nothingness below me. I was above it. I hold all the power to swing high into the clouds and float delicately into nirvana. I hold all the power to drop into oblivion. I’d done that before, but never realised the power within me. That was my indestructible weapon. Not my emotional stableness or my physical presence, but my power to blend the two together and become what I needed to become. Not what I wanted to become. I needed to confront what could destroy me but keep it at a distance. Keep it in constant eyesight; Not let it seep in.

And here I am. Continually swinging between utter contentment and unrest. I could see the bleakness stretch below me and my mind flickers to the quote; On what wings dare he aspire?/What the hand dare seize the fire?

Higher and higher I swung, climbing closer to the heavenly skies, and falling even closer to obscurity. I edged myself on the swing. So easy it will be to fling myself above … but everything that flies must rest.

I closed my eyes and felt myself slide off the swing. The wind coursed through my body and I let myself float into the unknown. As I greeted death I opened my eyes and finally knew.

We must know the depths in which we soar.