MAN:RESTARTED

 

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Contents

 

Intro

  • “Is this all there is?”
  • Camp Magic

Chapter 1- A Tale of Two Novembers

  • Forty
  • Redundant
  • Covid
  • The Mid-Life Puzzle

Chapter 2- A MAN:RESTARTED

  • Backbone and Heart
  • MAN:RESTARTED
  • Why?
  • The Seasons of a Man's Life
  • Looking forward, looking back
  • Who?
  • What?
  • How?
  • The Science of Happiness

Chapter 3- The Battle

  • A Life of Quiet Desperation
  • Boys Psychology
  • Boys Psychology & Relationships
  • Boy to Man
  • Rites of Passage
  • The Dad Deficit
  • Generations Lost
  • My Dad's Silent Battle
  • An Emotional Disconnect
  • Trigger Warning
  • The Lucky Ones; An Open Letter
  • A Sad Yet Vitally Important Important Conversation
  • The First of Winter
  • An Awakening

Chapter 4- The Restart

  • A Quick Reflection
  • Your Story
  • Self Aware… Schmelf Aware?
  • Negativity Bias
  • Today; The Most Important Day of Your Life
  • Me Map
  • SWOT Yourself
  • The Four Pillars (Circle)
  • A Mantra for Life
  • Backbone and Heart
  • Your MANifesto
  • Mental Wealth
  • Connection

Chapter 5- Mantra/MANifesto

  • Building the Foundation
  • Your MANifesto
  • Reaching Out
  • Have a Go Ya Mug!
  • Question Time
  • Your Code
  • MAN Standards
  • Self Identity
  • Porn
  • Finding Your True Self

Chapter 6- Mental Wealth

  • Positive Psychology
  • P.E.R.M.A
  • Stress
  • Finding Clarity
  • Mental Wealth
  • Emotional Muscle
  • Emotional Muscle Training
  • Emotional IQ for Men
  • Resilience
  • The Resilience Project
  • Mental Health Spectrum
  • Bouncing Forward
  • Gratitude
  • Empathy
  • Mindfulness
  • Mindful Moments

     -Relationships

-Sex

-Music

  • Meditation
  • Inversion Thinking
  • A Plan for Mental Wealth
  • Sleep
  • Exercise
  • Diet
  • Creativity
  • Perspective
  • Flap Your Gums
  • Men's Groups
  • Active Mateship
  • Find a Mission
  • Self Talk
  • The Stop/Present Method
  • Doubting Yourself
  • Fear of Failure
  • Fear of Success
  • Procrastination
  • A Yes Man
  • Energy Vampires
  • The Wrap Up

Chapter 7- Love Connections

  • P.E.R.M.A Recap
  • Who's this chapter for?
  • The Harvard Study
  • The Ball is in Our Court
  • Consistent, Honest and Empathetic
  • Our Time
  • The Relationship Tripod
  • Relationship Resilience

     -Gratitude

-Empathy

-Time Empathy

-Mindfulness

  • Relationship Growth
  • Love IQ
  • Romantic IQ
  • Erotic IQ
  • The Paradox of Intimacy
  • Spontaneity
  • Creativity
  • Imagination
  • Playfulness
  • Curiosity
  • Mystery
  • Erotic Communication
  • A Final Word

Chapter 8- Mates

  • A Mate in Need is a Mate Indeed
  • Men's Social Connectedness
  • The Guidance of Fellow Man
  • Mens's Groups
  • A Community of Mates
  • Reach In
  • A Brotherhood of Good Men
  • Engaging with Mates
  • Our Boys
  • Simmo-MC Renn

Outro


References


 

 

 

 

 

 

Copyright © MAN:RESTARTED/Steve Pinner 2021. 
Published in 2021 by Tablo Publishing.

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Intro...

Nobody can go back and start a new beginning 

but anyone can start today and make a new ending

-Maria Robinson

This book is for all the men who have woken up one morning and asked themselves the question;

"Is this all there is?"

It is a question that so many of us ponder as we enter and then travel through the middle years of our lives. In fact, it's one of the many questions that we seek to answer when we find ourselves unsure, unhappy and maybe even fearful of living a life unfulfilled.

The challenges of the middle-years of life can of course be exacerbated by relationship breakdowns, career upheaval or money issues. However, so often this midlife struggle is seemingly without reason as a man may have everything that he has ever wished for. A happy relationship. Healthy kids. Success in his career. A supportive group of mates. Financial stability. Yet they still find themselves stuck in a state of 'quiet desperation'. They know that they need change but articulating just what the change means and how to achieve it seems out of reach.

I know how these men feel because, as a man now deep into his forties, I have shared those feelings of helplessness and turmoil. This was despite all the evidence that suggested I should be feeling the polar opposite. My marriage was healthy and thriving. My wife and I had been blessed with two awesome kids and we were very close, sharing many precious times together.

I was also surrounded by a loving and close knit family, had work that left me satisfied and financially comfortable. This was not to mention my group of close mates who I enjoyed fantastic, raucous times with as well as provided me with great support. Despite all of the amazing things that I had in my life, I was left with a nagging feeling that I was letting everyone down, myself included. I often felt lethargic, flat, unmotivated, struggling to find direction and for the first time in my life, I was developing a sense that I didn't have the unlimited time to do all the things that I wanted to do.  

It was when I went through upheaval in my professional life that all of these feelings and beliefs really came to a head. As I faced the reality of being forced from a role that I loved, I began to take deep stock of just who I was and what I was doing with my life. When I look back now, it was thanks to the trauma of losing that job that I was pushed towards finding a way to reinvigorate my self-belief, my purpose, my priorities and how I lived each and every one of my days. 

I also learnt how to manage the down times that inevitably raise their ugly heads every now and again. I found a way to relight the fire in my belly that I thought had been extinguished. My enthusiasm returned and along with it, a new found impetus to live every day to it's fullest. Most importantly, I realised that the path that I had found was not only a path that provided me with a personal direction but could be used by other men to deliver them a life that they yearn for.

This is the story of how I became a MAN:RESTARTED and how you will too.


The Inspiration;

Sydney, September 2015

The large scout hall on Sin City's north western outskirts was filled with the noise of nervous banter and excited laughter from the assembled gathering of kids and adults.

The getting-to-know-you games had been running for about 10 minutes, with activities that saw groups assembled through instructions such as ‘find everyone with the same eye colour' and ’make groups with those who have the same favourite pizza topping’. Some of the kids shyly made their way to the right option, leading their adult ‘mentor' by the hand, while the boisterous ones careered away from their buddies, making as much of a racket as possible.

After the group had arranged themselves into a massive line based on height that twisted around the hall, Kristy Thomas, co-founder of ‘Feel the Magic’, suddenly softened the volume and lowered the tone in her voice. The instructions for the final icebreaker activity had a deeper motive than to just help strangers to start interacting with each other. It reminded everyone exactly why they were there. 

In a tone that met the gravity of the request, Kristy asked;

“Now I’d like you to find others who have lost the same family member that you have. 

Those who have lost their mum, please stand together. 

Those who have lost their dad please join together. 

And those who have lost siblings please find each other in another group.”

This was Camp Magic.

A three day ‘grief’ camp established by the ‘Feel the Magic’ charity that brought together children who had suffered the traumatic loss of a parent, sibling or close loved one.

The weekend of activities had a number of objectives for the kids attending; to help them understand their grief, to develop skills that would help to deal with their loss and, I believe most critically, to make friendships that ensure they know that they are not alone.

The children, aged from seven to seventeen, slowly started to form groups. With their adult mentors by their side, they slowly sought out others that had suffered the same tragedy that they had.

Heartbreaking murmurs of ‘my mum’, ‘my daddy' were clearly audible.

When everyone had had found their group as requested by Kristy, a dreadful revelation took my breath away. In the middle of the hall stood two kids who had suffered the pain of losing a brother or sister. Ten kids gathered who had tragically lost their precious mum.

In the final group, some thirty boys and girls huddled together who had lost their dad.

Thirty.

Thirty men lost in the prime of their life. 

Thirty shattered little souls who would never again feel the warmth of their dad’s arms, the guidance of his voice or see the sparkle in his eyes.

It hit me like a freight train. I instantaneously felt terrible sorrow.

So many lost dads. 

So many little kids with broken hearts.  

So many wives left devastated and alone. 

So many teenagers left without a vital guiding light.

Cancer. Heart disease. Car accidents. Suicide. So many of these deaths preventable and every single one leaving a trail of trauma and the tragedy of memories left 'un-lived'.

The pain etched onto the faces of these unbelievably brave kids was heart wrenching. As mentors, we would see glimpses of their former selves over the weekend; the fun loving joyful smiles that had been lost through the relentlessness of their tears. The brief moments when they forgot about their pain and could just be kids again, laughing, playing and feeling the joy of a new friendship. The freedom of being seen for who they really are and not just that kid at school who had lost a parent.

Camp Magic also gave these kids respite from the bullying that can regularly come from cruel children with no understanding of the damage that they cause. They were amongst people who 'got it'. The importance of just feeling like a normal kid again cannot be overestimated. Camp Magic provided grieving children with the safe space to share their stories of loss, allow their tears to flow, to laugh without feeling guilty, to overcome challenges in the outdoor recreation activities and eventually return safely to their families. Complete with a new understanding that they were not alone and that life will be sunny again one day.

The unrelenting feeling as a volunteer mentor is to find a way to make their hurt go away. But no one can do that. Nothing will ever take away their pain. It may dull over time but the pain of a deep loss like that, and especially at such a tender age, is a one that is never truly lost.

The experience of being a mentor at Camp Magic has helped me find my life’s calling. While I didn't realise it at the time, these were my first steps towards what would eventually morph into MAN:RESTARTED. I knew back then that I had to find a way to do more than just volunteer a few weekends every a year to be a friend, a sounding board and a shoulder to cry on.

While I can’t take away the pain from the kids who have lost their dads, I can help the kids who’s dads are still alive. The kids who’s dads are with us but are on a path to a shortened life. I can work towards this by inspiring and educating men in the prime of their lives to not take their lives for granted.

To get living. To get moving. To get healthy. To get loving.

To get RESTARTED.

Those of us who are now in the middle years of our life and who are also fathers understand all of that in our hearts but there’s always something holding us back from making the changes that we know we need to make. 

This is where I come in.

As an educator I have worked with students ranging in age from 4 years of age to 60. My focus has always been on making learning fun, relevant and easy to implement into real life. The teaching trade is pretty straight forward in my view; seek out the required knowledge and information, adapt it so that people can easily comprehend and understand it and then use that knowledge to better their lives. That is teaching in a nutshell.

Sitting beside that is the ability to understand your students, know what makes them tick and what will help them find the switch that turns on the light of hope and excitement. This ability is vital to the premise of MAN:RESTARTED as I know what blokes like myself need; an appreciation that we are not alone in those feelings of being stuck, worried, regretful and sometimes fucking petrified. Most vitally we need to know that there is a way to leave all that wasted energy and time behind.

There is so much fantastic work being done in the men's health and wellbeing field yet it can be exceptionally time consuming to find, somewhat difficult to understand and then a challenge to implement into your life.

MAN:RESTARTED is chockers with strategies and real world actions which are the outcome of the legwork that I have done. I’ve spent hours, days, weeks, months and even years, reading, researching and immersing myself in as many topics, theories and strategies that a man in his mid-life could benefit from. In some areas I’ve started out as an absolute novice and educated myself, while in others I’ve had a solid foundation to build upon. I consider myself to be a committed, passionate and lifelong student in this stuff. My goal was to take the wealth of knowledge that is available, mesh that with my own philosophies, ideas and experiences and then adapt all of that into a one stop shop to help blokes in their middle years re-engage with what truly matters in their life.

The content we will cover together, both in this book, in the ensuing MAN:RESTARTED titles and via any other means that you decide is worthy of your time, effort, commitment and hard earned, is real life stuff. Stuff that has worked for many other men in the same situations that you (and I) have found ourselves in.

MAN:RESTARTED is all about gathering the information that makes a difference, filtering out the crap and helping you re-discover the fire in your belly that is still smoldering somewhere deep inside. It is written it in a style that is intentionally ‘like a chat with a mate over a beer’ as that’s how I speak in real life and is authentically me.

So this is for the guys who desperately need a fresh start. They want to re-connect with their partners and their kids. They need to get healthy. To do work that has meaning. It’s for the men who have a nagging feeling of time running out and a profound urge for change. The fellas who want to throw off the shackles of the past and tackle their present and future with open hearts and relentless enthusiasm.

It is also for the wives and partners who want their man to be happy and healthy. To rediscover their shared passion and love in a lifelong rampage through the years together.

Finally it is for the kids and teenagers who desperately need the unique loving presence, direction, playfulness and kindness that only a dad can provide.

This book is dedicated to my precious wife and partner in all things fun, Meagan, and our two amazing kids, Hayley and Darcy.

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A Tale of Two Novembers

Everything you want is on the other side of hard

-Monty Williams

November 2013

As I stood at the tee box at the Dunes Golf Club on Victoria's Mornington Peninsula, I took a brief moment to ponder life.

The view on this perfect late spring day was one that urges you make a mental bookmark. The brilliant green manicured, rolling fairways, the perfectly curated bunkers and a sparkling blue sky that matched the unusually placid seas of the Bass Strait in the distance.

It was a moment in time that demanded to be savoured, so an imprint of it could be recalled on demand. It’s always handy to have a few ‘happy mental places’ on speed dial when circumstances get tough.

As took in the serenity of what lay in front of me, it hit me like a tonne of bricks…

I was 40. 

FORTY. 

The big FOUR-OHHHHHH.

Wow… it suddenly dawned on me that my life was going way too quickly. It felt like the past 20 years had gone in a flash. Despite the realisation that I was now officially going to be the target of over-the-hill jibes, I couldn’t help but think that this 40 caper actually wasn't all that bad. Here I was on a glorious day, celebrating my milestone birthday by playing 18 holes of golf with a group of my closest mates. Despite hitting the ball like a drunk, and with the drinks cart not yet even in sight, the company, scenery and plans for the rest of the weekend brought a smile to my dial.

After this handicap shredding round was over, we’d be off to the famous Sorrento Hotel to meet our wives, partners and a gang of other friends to celebrate the first 40 years of my life.  

Good times, with hopefully many more to come.

I don't think there’s much better than a night in the company of close friends, with a few frosty cold beers, some tasty tucker and a drop of very decent red. When the morning rolled around, we’d head back to Melbourne to pick up the kids from their grandparents and get ready for the another week of work, school and the rigmarole of everyday life.

I suppose you could describe my state of mind at that specific point in time as being content. Things were cruising along nicely for me and my family in general. I was very happy with my lot in life, that was for sure.

Yet for some reason, my contentment was really only skin deep. Why did I, despite all of the  great things in my life, have a nagging feeling of something not being quite right? Why was I beginning to ask myself whether I had more to offer, more to give and whether all was genuinely as great as it seemed to be. Why did life seem to be getting more confusing and harder to get a grip on? Was I the only one who felt like this? I thought life experience only made things easier… Was 40 years not experienced enough?

Maybe the rolling fairways and beautifully curated bunkers were a perfect analogy on life. Try as you might to stay on the gentle and easy fairway, it’s landing in the occasional bunker that makes a round more challenging and rewarding. As long as you don't duff your recovery shots too often…

While I certainly wasn't in a bunker in my life at that time, little did I know that a bloody big one was just around the corner (and not the one I encountered during a golf trip to Tassie a few months later).

Steve in the infamous 'Jaws' bunker, 

Barnbougle Dunes Golf Club, Tasmania, April 2014

November 2014

Fast forward almost exactly one year to the day and I’m just about to tick over to 41, blissfully married, proud dad of two, mortgage holder, living in suburban Melbourne and buried in a very deep emotional bunker.

Made redundant.

Unemployed. Unwanted. A failure. Totally out of the blue. A victim of that modern workforce phenomenon known as a ‘restructure’. 

My redundancy letter spelt it out most eloquently;

“The redundancy will take effect and your employment will end on 28th November 2014. Please be assured that this decision is not a reflection on your performance.”

Oh that's just fkn awesome… I feel very assured... and very unemployed.

So while my drive from the 4th tee box at the Dunes Golf Club 12 months earlier had a predictable sharp curve on it, this was a curve ball that I didn’t see coming (apologies for the mixed sporting metaphor.)

In the weeks that followed the official word that my services were no longer required, I went through what felt like a continual roller coaster of emotions; panic, excitement, dread, sleeplessness, positivity. While I was usually a glass-half-full person, this bolt from the blue had caused me to feel real anxiety about my future and how it would effect my family.

Mortgage payments, bills, kids school fees, additional financial and work pressure on my wife, what would I do now? How would I replace the income that had just evaporated in front of my eyes? It was not only the financial logistics of life that kept me awake at night but the kick in the balls of my self- esteem too. I had always felt respected and valued during the 6 years I had been with this private education provider. Now they were saying that they didn't need me. The knowledge that they'd move on quickly and with no sentimentality really hurt. Looking back now, it's clear that my self-image and self-identity was inextricably tied to what I did for a crust. Now that had been rejected, who was I?

Amidst the gloom, what became clear to me was that this challenge was the perfect opportunity to head in a new direction. When I completed my teaching degree as a 31 year old, I had seen and experienced a working life outside of a classroom. I was never looking for or expecting a lifetime as a classroom teacher as I had ambitions to build a career beyond traditional education. A bit of this was due to a determination not to wake up one day and realise that I was the grumpy old teacher taking out the frustrations in my life on my students. I had shaken my head so often at at these types in the past with a condescending 'why would you keep doing something you obviously hate?' I certainly didn't hate teaching, I genuinely loved it but even then I could see the direction the profession was being taken by bureaucrats and it seemed inevitable that I would be eaten up like so many others had and sadly still are.

Surely this unexpected twist of fate had to be for a reason, right? The old saying that crisis brings opportunity kept ringing in my ears so all I had to do was work out what the hell my opportunity would be. What I did know for sure was that I couldn’t go back to what I had been doing.

So I started to write.

I wrote to do lists, wish lists, lists of possible things that I could do, lists of what I thought I had a talent for. At about #3 on my wish list, behind opening the batting for Australia and kicking the winning goal in a Grand Final for St.Kilda, neither of which was on the ‘talent for’ list mind you, was to write a book. What to write about generated another furious bout of list writing but one idea stood out and it made perfect sense.

Write about turning 40.

Write about being a 40-year-old man with hopes, dreams, worries, and uncertainty. Write about being a 40-year-old man in a happy marriage that has been able to withstand it's challenges. Write about being a 40-year-old man with kids. Write about how I felt about losing my job. Write about all the interesting things and influences that have caused me to land where I was on that day. At that stage there was no ambition to have those words read by others, just an urge to get them onto paper, or a screen to be more accurate.

So what started out as a hobby due to having a little more time on my hands has gradually developed into a professional passion. My little side project would soon be given a clear direction thanks to a series of curve balls, or in a more appropriate Aussie vernacular, an over of in-swinging, toe-crushing ‘yorkers’ headed my way, that the brilliant Pakistani fast bowler Wasim Akram would be proud of. 

In the 12 months that followed the loss of my job I was struck by a range of events that ran the entire gamut of emotions; from abject sadness to inspired optimism. Every one of these experiences gave me a clearer perspective of my purpose and of the importance of getting what would become the MAN:RESTARTED message out;

  • The death of two mates in separate and very different tragedies.
  • The realisation that a number of people close to me were suffering from a variety of emotional and mental ill health issues.
  • The awareness of my own health issues.
  • Becoming involved with the ‘Feel the Magic’ organisation.

COVID-19: The very definition of a Yorker

I was in the final days of ticking off this final draft, approving the design and ready to hit the PUBLISH button when a nasty bastard by the name of Covid-19 sat the world on it's arse.... well it literally sat the world on it's arse in fact as we were all told to return to the safety of our couches and start smashing streaming services (thank goodness for the ‘The Last Dance’!)

I wasn't initially sure whether to add some thoughts about the deadly pandemic that was creating havoc around the globe and any impact it would have on the MAN:RESTARTED mission. I decided on including these brief comments as, despite all the uncertainty that still surrounds us, I am sure that this monumental upheaval can be used as a prompt for a great evolution for middle aged men around the world.

Covid-19 has changed our lives in ways that, at this time, we can't possibly fathom. As I write this addendum, it's late 2020. The virus is still killing thousands of people around the world every day and the promise of an effective vaccine is still some time away. Although the spread in Australia seems to have been contained thanks to our population sticking to strict lockdown laws and a ‘Covid-Safe’ life, we still have months of uncertainty in front of us. At it's core we still don't really know how the virus will affect us if we contract it as the original belief that only the old and frail are at it's mercy is being challenged with healthy people in their 20's, 30's and 40's falling ill and, in some cases, dying lonely deaths away from their loved ones.

There's no doubt that lockdowns and the anxiety of facing an illness that may have an dramatic effect on those infected has created pain and chaos. The tragic loss of thousands of people can not be understated but often is. It's easy to look at statistics and forget that every single number in the deaths column is a person who is being deeply mourned by those who love them. To anyone who has lost a loved one, my sincere condolences and thoughts are with you. 

The financial trauma of losing work and collapsing businesses has also been felt by the millions around the world. In both work and family life, the loss of freedom, social interaction and the opportunities to do things that are healthy for our minds as well as our bodies have been put on hold. Isolation may now have it's own hashtag but being #iso can be an exceptionally dangerous at the best of times, let alone when anxiety about a killer pandemic is running rampant. While we're yet to hear about the full cost of isolation in terms of mental ill health and how individuals have been affected during this period, its safe to say that it's going to have been a really brutal time for anyone with mental ill health symptoms. We are also yet to see the outcome of lockdown on domestic abuse, which again, sadly, will most likely be disturbing reading.

On the other side of the spectrum the lockdown has been a welcome respite from hectic lives for many. Despite losing the precious contact with our extended family and friends, this enforced time with our immediate family has been an unexpected gift. A chance to re-connect with our kids and become more closely involved with their education. To take a lunchtime walk with your wife, cook a home made dinner for your family every night and re-build the very beneficial habit of sitting down for a meal and quality time together. We will speak often about the relentless commitments that our middle years of life bring us in this book, so Covid has actually allowed the relentless calendar entries to be temporarily replaced by blank spaces that have allowed for peace, time and the chance to knock many of the long ignored 'do's' off the to-do list around the house. I truly hope we can hold onto some of these freedoms once this crisis is over.

It's been an experience that our family of four will look back on fondly in many ways, not- withstanding a few to-be-expected moments where being locked up with three others has heightened emotions. We have enjoyed spending time together eating home cooked meals at the dinner table every night, free from swim squad or footy training, committee meetings or the weariness that a long day commuting to and from work brings. Our nightly games of UNO have been a highlight of a new life schedule as have long walks in the beautiful natural bushland not far from our home.

One clear conclusion that the Covid-19 outbreak has re-affirmed for me is that so many of the key messages that MAN:RESTARTED espouses are desperately needed in our lives. Pre-Covid I was confident that these strategies were well-founded, now I know they are with a supreme belief. It is without debate that making the investment in your own ‘Mental Wealth’ is a priority, as is appreciating and celebrating your romantic relationship. Isolation has made us very aware of the priceless value of our friendships and how vital a calling being an involved, present and patient dad truly is. Covid-19 has made us appreciate these critical elements of our life as we've been forced to see how much they mean to us when some were taken away.

Hopefully you're one of the fortunate men who have used this unprecedented time to see the opportunity to make well overdue changes in your life. Guiding and supporting you towards whatever change that you have locked into is the intention throughout MAN:RESTARTED.

So no matter where you are at in your life, the opportunity to change the path in front of you is in your hands. What you do with this moment in time is the $64K question (that’s really worth a shitload more a measly 64 grand).

The Mid-Life Puzzle

The two-year period from late 2013 until the end of 2015 brought about a dramatic change in not only how I looked at myself but how I saw my future. In the following chapter I will briefly share with you how I fumbled my way through that transition, seeking answers to the mass of questions that I was confronted with. I like to use the analogy of middle-life being like a jigsaw puzzle… often you find yourself in a dilemma where a massive piece of your puzzle just can't be found. Just when you're ready to up-turn the table and lose your shit, you spot a fragment that's fallen under the couch. That piece of information then leads to another, then another and before you know it, that huge hole of uncertainty has been filled with understanding, knowledge and then a plan of action.

The steps that I will take you through over the course of the next few chapters summarise how I managed to put feelings of self-doubt, a lack of direction and an absence of purpose into my rear vision mirror. They can still raise their ugly heads occasionally but now I can identify what they actually represent; a mid-life transition that I have inevitably had to face and progress through. I used to think that I was alone in thinking and feeling those self-destructive and self-sabotaging thoughts. 

I now know otherwise. 

What I was experiencing was something that all men go through at some stage between the ages of 35 and 45... it's just the degree to which this ‘biological rite of passage’ affects us that differs. So while our circumstances may be different, many of the issues that men in their middle-years share are quite common and arise from similar experiences. All that I ask of you is your commitment to seek the pieces that help you solve your own mid-life puzzle. They may not become apparent immediately but please stick with it... sometimes it only takes one passage in a book to make a monumental breakthrough as I found when I read Steve Biddulph's words about 'Backbone and Heart', which we'll also get to shortly.

Once you find one of these hidden gems, it's like unlocking a vital piece of knowledge that is missing from your 'How to Man' manual. The momentum builds and before you know it, you're looking at your life and your future in a totally different light.

And that's basically my job here. To feed you the little tidbits of information and the real life strategies that I know will make such a difference to the lives of blokes of my vintage. 

The average Australian male now lives to about 81 years of age, which begs the question;

How are you going to attack your life’s ‘back nine’?

 

 

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A MAN:RESTARTED

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The RESTART

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A Mantra & MANifesto

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Mental Wealth

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Love Connections 

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~

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