Secret Powers


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Air.....I needed....air..

My lungs were bursting.... couldn’t .... breathe...

My mind couldn’t tell where up and down was but I knew someone was there. Someone who I knew I’ve met before...

The water was so cold...and dark...except for.... the eyes. I opened my mouth for a scream, trying to wake myself up. My body had frozen, I couldn’t move...

My heart was pounding so hard, I feared it would breaks my ribs....

A scream woke me up. Covered in sweat I sat up in my bed, surrounded by blinding darkness. I listened to the scream. Who was that? I couldn’t get my body to stop shivering. It toke me a few minutes until I realized it was me who screamed. Still in shock, I slowly remembered where I was. My room. In my bed. 

In the dark, my shaky hands tried to untangle my blanket that had rapped itself around my legs during my nightmare. I lied back down and pulled up the blanket until it reached my chin, thinking it would protect me from the dream like a shield.  

That dream. I have dreamed that dream ever since I can remember. I sighed in exhaustion and turned my head towards the window. Dim moon light shone through my little window, making creepy shadows on the opposite wall. This was the time when the dream was the worst. Every time when the full moon approached, the dream became more real, more frightening. You couldn’t  imagine how sick I was of waking up in the middle of the night, screaming like a baby, unable to fall asleep again. Believe me, I’ve tried everything.

But those eyes. Dark yellow with green veins. I knew I’ve seen these eyes before but I just couldn’t figure out who they belonged to. 

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Ben Agar

Hmm a good prologue to start. Has gripped me as a reader. Great job!

Chapter 1

 „Mahina! Hurry up we’re going to be late“, shouted an impatient voice that belonged to my sometimes-very-demanding-grandmother. While rolling my eyes I shouted back over my shoulder: „I‘ll be right there, just give me a minute!“

My face turned back to the full sized mirror and I looked at my reflection. Overall, I had a normal body. Long blond-Brown wavy hair that reached the hips, tall and slender body, big green-blue eyes with little golden sprinkles in them, red lips and a little nose. My outfit consisted of blue jeans, a longsleeved white blouse and a pair of yellow sneakers. The only jewelry was a pair of small earrings, hidden behind my hair. 

Satisfied with my appearance I grabbed my phone, stuck it into the backpocket of my jeans and rushed out of my room into the hallway, down a flight of stairs towards the front door. There, my granny looked impatiently at her watch. „Come on child, you don’t want to miss New Years celebration!“, she opened the front door and walked out of the house. I followed her and closed the door behind me. „Hey wait“, I yelled after her, running to catch up. Boy, she was pretty fast for an old lady. We turned right and followed the faint sound of music, coming from the center of the village. The street lights were on even though it wasn’t completely dark yet. „Fit, not old“, she suddenly said while walking quickly down the sidewalk. I wrinkled my forehead in confusion. „What do you mean?“. She didn’t look at me but kept right on walking. „I would say that I‘m a fit lady, not an old one“, she said with her lips twitching. My eyes widened in surprise. „I‘m sorry, I didn’t mean ....wait, were you in my head again?“. Granny smiled. I sighed. „Oh come on, you can’t just do that in broad day light!“. Her face turned to me: „It’s evening“, she said calmly. „Still, what if someone heard you and figured something out?“. I had lowered my voice to a whisper. Her reply didn’t really help. „So what? The whole town already thinks I’m crazy, why not help to support the image?“. She winked at me. At this point, I was sure she was going crazy. But I mean, she was definitely not a normal granny. Granny opened her mouth again. „I‘ve been meaning to ask, how’s  it going with“, she lowered her voice, „ you know, your studies?“. My answer was a slight mumble. „Ok“, I responded. 

We reached the crosswalk and waited for the pedestrian light to turn green. Silently we crossed the street. On the other side of the road we followed a little path that led to a park That was the source of the music. There were booths everywhere but the main part of the huge crowd was in the middle of park, on the dancefloor. I stood on my toes, looking for Daya and Tyler, my two best friends. Finally I recognized Daya‘s blond hair and I started walking towards her when a strong hand grabbed my elbow. Stunned, I turned around and looked into granny’s face. „I was just going to dance with my friends....“, I started but she interrupted me with a wave of her Hand. „You know, just because we’re different, doesn’t mean we have to fit in to be perfect. Be yourself and you are perfect“. Her confident brown eyes looked into mine for a few moments, then she turned around. I stared at her back as she walked away into the crowd. Wow, I haven’t heard her talk this emotionally in years. Still confused by what she meant, I mingled into the crowd.


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BAD Agar

Hmm not as strong as the prologue bit still good, although I don't understand the formatting. Wrong way around speech marks and commas on both the bottom and top of the beginning and end of speech is a little off putting. Might need a good re-formatting.

Chapter 2

A bright light woke me up in the middle of the night. Already prepared for what was coming I kicked back my blanked and slowly stood up. My long blue nightgown rustled as I walked towards my mirror, into the light. My bare feet made the noice of soft footsteps on the yellow carpet. I stopped in front of the mirror and closed my eyes. The moonlight reached my feet and suddenly, I could hear the sound of tiny little bells, like sparkles. The light formed and wandered up my body, leaving a tickling feeling behind. Behind my closed eyelids I could see the moonlight filling up the room. Then it was over. The sounds disappeared and so did the light with it. I opened my eyes and looked into the mirror. My appearance kind of looked the same, except for a minor detail. Actually, it was a pretty big detail. Starting On my back and continuing all the way down to the floor was a pair of shiny wings with feathers the color of the moon. My face had changed too. My ears were longer and sharper, my skin had become paler. Without showing any expressions I looked at my reflection. This was the real me. This is what I became every month. The only one knowing about this, was granny. 

Staring at the mirror I thought of the New Years celebration last night. It wasn’t that different from all the other events that happened around here, except the “happy new year 2970” and the fireworks. Deep in thoughts I took my phone from my night table and looked at the pictures I took. Daya and Tyler kissing at midnight, me eating a huge piece of cake, Samuel dancing with me, Mr porter flirting with granny....

None of them, except granny, knew what I was, not even my BFFs Daya and Tyler. 

All the others thought of me as the weird girl who never went to any sleepovers or romantic pool parties in the light of a full moon, who still possessed a phone from the last century even though no one used them anymore due to the lack of WiFi (I kept my granny’s phone to take pictures) and who had weird scars on her back. 

I myself didn’t really know what I was but my granny always to the term “water girl “. Right, as if having wings is proof that I swim a lot (pure sarcasm). 

Granny used to be a “water girl” but someone had took her wings. Sometimes I think that it’s the same person who killed my parents when I was a baby and who those eyes from my dream belonged to. 

Granny only teaches me how to use my magic of air. Sometimes she’ll let me go out at night when it’s real cloudy so I can practice my flying skills. One time she got this nostalgic look on her face, as if she remembered the times she was able to fly. I really wished I could help her. I believed that I should find my parents murderer, granny thinks we should stay hidden. 

She is kind of a mom to me. She took me in and cared for me when I was only a few months old. Now, 17 years later she has turned old. Now it’s my turn to take care of her. 

I had been so deep in thoughts that I hadn’t realized that the moonlight was already fading. In just a Split Second, I was a human girl again. The lack of sleep made me yawn and I crawled back to bed. Sleepily I stared at the ceiling. I just loved my room. It was light blue with a window over my desk. The purple curtains looked black in the night, so did the dark brown wood of the frame of my mirror. On the walls I had hung many pictures of landscapes, all dran by me with watercolors. 

I yawned again. Boy was I glad I was on May break this week. The next break would be August break and then I’d finally turn of age and could help granny with the bills. I closed my eyes and didn’t open them until a few hours later. 
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BAD Agar

An interesting reveal. Although there is a lot of telling not showing in this chapter. Alot of the stuff in here would be interesting if you made it into a scene (especially doing the flying stuff with her granny) Otherwise keep it up!


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