"Remembering my past is something I try to forget everyday,

wishing that I may lose all these memories that haunts me and trying to start new but the more I run away,

the more I lie to myself."

Netherlands 1894 (Present)

"Is everything ready Estelle?" granny, the head chief of the village asked. I nodded and smiled at her while preparing the wagon, then jumped on the front seat gripping the rope and getting ready to set off together with my fellow villagers. 

"You all take care, be back before sunset!" she yelled at us while waving goodbye, I waved back and whipped my horse.

The clouds. . my mind was completely hollow as I gazed at it. I sighed, it's been a year since the village acknowledged me after being exiled from my country and they never asked the reason why. Obviously they're bothered, after all I was a stranger, and strangers have a capability to harm this beautiful village. But they choose to make me feel comfortable rather quenching they're curiosity and I'm grateful for that. So better do my job well, as a return.

The morning cold wind brushed my face and a sad thought came up to me, Remembering my past is something I try to forget everyday, wishing that I may lose all these memories that haunts me and trying to start new but the more I run away, the more I lie to myself.  I paused as a glimpse of him crosses my mind, the more I think about it, the more I pity myself.. "The clouds are beautiful today. . I hope you can see it too". 

Upon arriving, lots of merchants from other places filled the loud crowd of the local market. Same as ever, better move my butt and finished the job.

"Estelle, let's meet here after" my companions instructed. I nod and started to deliver our goods. 

"Hi Ms. Montello, here's your carrots" I said carrying the basket, "Are these fresh?" she asked while checking some of them. I winked at her "When did I let you down?" She laughs and handed me the payment. The sun was high and I was busy attending my patrons when I overheard a conversation between those two guys.

"So they will do it" he said.

"Do what?" the latter confusedly asked.

"The execution of Laurent the 6th King of Belgium"

My eyes widen the moment I heard of it, and before I knew it became the topic in the local market. Everyone had their own views and opinions but they all agreed in one thing . . .

The Execution of the former King.

I felt a pain in my chest, those words, those cruel words everyone mumbling around are like sharp crystals, stabbing me vigorously.

I was shaking until one of my companions approached and asked me if I was alright. I don't know what to do, I looked at him not knowing my tears was about to fall.

"Estelle, tell me what's wrong?" he worriedly asked.

But instead of answering him, my feet drag me towards my wagon and I drove as fast as I could to Belgium.

Everyone who knows my story will think that I was being utterly insane. Who would be dumb enough to go back to the country you're exiled and endanger yourself?

What is exactly my reason?

What is it that I want to do?

Is it to watch the former King execution?

To see him in pain?

After all, he's the reason why I was exiled in my country.

But no, actually I just unconsciously brought myself in this situation. I bit my lower lip stopping myself to cry as soon as I realized the truth.

Why?

"Is just that the former king, that person is somewhat important to me" I said as my tears fall and the blood starts to flow from my lips.

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-Flashback-

Belgium 1885

At the age of 10 I live on my own, I'm an orphan and I don't care about the whereabouts of my parents, I don't care if they leave me for my own good or for themselves, either way I'm happy on my own. I don't blame them. For what I see now, you should do what it takes to survive. 

How do I live? I steal. Not only for myself but for those families who can't afford to support their selves because of the monarch's' unlawful taxes. We, who are away from the Kingdom experience this unruly world while those people inside drown their selves in foods and money. I don't feel any remorse, after all they steal money from us.

I faced this reality every day and to avoid this cruel truth I went to a place that only me knows. .

a place which can deceived you that the world is perfect, 

a place secluded from the hell we're living.

It has a beautiful scenery. .dandelions around the lake, willow trees, dragonflies everywhere but behind that beauty something ugly resides at the heart of it. . .

THE LAKE.

It has the color of darkness.

One time I went there I was surprised to see someone lying beside the lake. I tiptoed myself towards it. It was a boy, wearing a simple clothes but I can tell that he isn't one of us. He's sleeping and completely unaware of my presence. I kneel down beside and leaned staring at him. He's well groomed and his skin screams of that nobility, that moment I knew he's one of those people inside. He suddenly woke up and accidentally bumped my head, I exclaimed in pain.

"Sorry, I didn't mean too" he apologized in a gentle way.

"Who are you? and how did you find this place?" I asked curiously.

"How did you?" He replied looking at me innocently.

"Because I'm a wanderer?" I said tilting my head.

He stand up and offer me a hand and smiled "Me too."

At first I hesitated, the gap of our status is quite big even I didn't ask but that started our unusual friendship, his name was Rent.

"Sometimes I wonder, how darkness live in something so beautiful." he said looking at the lake sadly.

" Do you want to do something good?" I interrupted.

He looked at me with curiosity

I smiled, giving him a glimpse of hope. 

"Let's make it silver".

He came to the lake every day at the same time, from noon until the sun sets, we played and cleaned the lake. I find him entertaining since there are a lot of things he doesn't know. He's with me everywhere I go, steal with me, run with me and laugh with me.

I don't know where he came from, whenever I ask him he won't say anything. Sometimes I wonder how can he not see that some of the things we do are contrary to the rule.

"Did it ever crossed your mind? Like you got scared of me or something, because even if you won't tell me I know that you came in the high class society and all of the girls you meet there had nice clothes, good etiquette."

"Are you jealous or something?" he teased.

"Of course not!" I blushed. "I'm just asking about your impression on me! First and now!"I shout while pouting.

"Geezzz. okay. Hmmm. You're obviously different from them. My first and current impression hasn't changed actually. . . you're still innocent, cute and lovely. Why would I be scared for something beautiful?" he said smiling at me. My heart skipped, this boy was really oblivious to reality. 

Starting that time I begin to make him see things the way I see it. I offered my hands for him and ask him to come with me, then he'll ask where, giving me an innocent look. I laugh at him and say "to reality". Then I'll bring him to the families I helped and he'll feel sorry for them. The next day I saw him bringing foods from his place, enough for him to carry and give to them. And when the sun sets, he would always say "we'll meet again" and leave.

We've been doing this for a long time now and as years passed we've been closer and closer, yet I still know nothing about him. All I know was that he is precious to me. 

We sat near the lake as we usually do, waiting for the sun to set. He asked me what my plans, what I want to do. "I want to help those people who had been neglected by the monarchy, I want to fight for their rights and to have justice for them, although I don't have the power to do those things, I still wish that they will have a better world someday"

"Am I too ambitious?" I asked him.

"No, it's perfect" he said lying down.

"Oh and before I forgot for this lake to be silver, were still half way" we both laugh.

"How about you?", I asked staring at him.

"I'll support you, you'll see this world someday would really change, together with the heart of this place, it would be sparkle and shimmery. I promise you that."  

That time, for some reason I believed him.

The following day, I went to the city proper for the King will introduce to the people the heir of his throne.

"May I present to all of you, Prince Laurent of Belgium!"

Everyone clapped their hands. I don't mind it actually, the reason I went there was because it's a perfect time to steal, but when the prince shows up in the balcony, I was startled.

It was Rent.

I immediately ran to our place and stared blankly at the lake waiting for the sun to set, but this time I'm alone.

I failed.

I hadn't stolen anything, my mind was blank and how come I never knew he was a prince for all those years. I though he was just some sort of high class but not a prince!

"Estelle?"upon hearing that voice I immediately stood up and bow my head, "Yes, your Highness" I said politely. I big silence engulfed us, he suddenly laugh at me like he usually did and said that whenever he went here he's not Laurent but Rent, my friend.

I playfully punched him, blaming for not telling me the truth. But he hold my hands and looked at me seriously, "I'm sorry for not telling you the truth for all these years, but I don't regret it. For if you have known who I really was, we would never be what we are today. Look, days had passed so fast and we had obligations to face now. I come here to tell you that I may not be able to sneak away from the castle like I used to be, but then again I want us to fulfill our plans like what we had planned, and I promise you. We'll meet again".

We hugged and that's the last time I talk to him.

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