By Lea Carrol

Copyright 2016 by William Abeleven - Publisher

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form without permission in writing from the author. Reviewers may quote brief passages in reviews.

DISCLAIMER

No part of this publication may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, mechanical or electronic, including photocopying or recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, or transmitted by email without permission in writing from the publisher.

While all attempts have been made to verify the information provided in this publication, neither the author nor the publisher assumes any responsibility for errors, omissions, or contrary interpretations of the subject matter herein.

This book is for entertainment purposes only. The views expressed are those of the author alone, and should not be taken as expert instruction or commands. The reader is responsible for their own actions. Adherence to all applicable laws and regulations, including international, federal, state and local governing professional licensing, business practices, advertising, and all other aspects of doing business in the US, Canada, or any other jurisdiction is the sole responsibility of the purchaser or reader.

Neither the author nor the publisher assume any responsibility or liability whatsoever on the behalf of the purchaser or reader of these materials.

Any perceived slight of any individual or organisation is purely unintentional.

FAULTLESS

There it was - just as she’d been told – “Hall, left side, third door.” Diana opened it slowly a crack and peered in. No sign of anyone - good. She quickly stepped in, pulling the door closed behind her. Silence. Bliss. Nothing but the sound of her own breathing and nothing of the world on the other side of the door. She kicked her pumps off and let her toes luxuriate in the feel of the plush pile carpet. “Hello?” she tried. The room was a cocoon. To her left, a soft night light spilled out through the crack of an open door. Behind it, the white porcelain of a hand basin gleamed back. Ahead, the shape of a bed. To her right, a desk or a dresser and a chair. Her eyes were adjusting now and further into the room, the shape of a two armchairs and a small low set table set between them. The room felt unoccupied – un-lived in, like an unoccupied hotel room - always ready. She wouldn’t be intruding on anyone’s privacy here.

She felt the tingling on the back of her neck from the little green pill she’d taken earlier. After just one, the feeling, the energy was still there. Her stomach felt a little tight and knotted. Diana had not eaten anything except an appetiser or two, so the drinks had gone straight to her head.

That single little green devil she’d taken had barely dealt with the effects of the alcohol. Perhaps her body was getting used to them, whatever they were. Kitty had started her on them almost a year ago and tonite she’d found she was on the last of them. Two were good, three even better – that was Kitty’s ‘prescription’. Her husband was a pharmacist and as well as helping him from Time to Time, she also helped her friends.

Callum would be irritated now and he would hold mention it later no doubt. She wasn’t being the good little wife tonight but it wasn’t her fault, was it? Kitty had been unreliable and left her short of her little green devils, had she?

Poor Callum, but fuck him, she giggled. He was such a stiff sometimes. True, it was an important night for him – for the whole family in fact, but it wasn’t as though she’d gone too far. Was she the only one in a good mood here tonight? Had nobody else had a drink and was having fun? And now she was being judged?

He was so paranoid now, even after all the years that had gone by. There’d be hardly anyone, if anyone at all who would even remember now what had happened to her. And it was, ‘to’ her. That was key. She hadn’t done anything. Things had been done to her and Callum just wouldn’t let it go. He would tell her later, and say how lucky it was that he’d spotted the signs early on that she was about to get drunk. And then he’d want to go over the past all over again.

He’d resigned after the ‘incident’, as he preferred to refer to it now – obliquely. It had been a work party too, like this one and if she had a drink or three he’d corner her and tell her, “Of course your welfare is important to me. You’re my wife.”

He hadn’t ever chastised her, but it was always in the air. For the first few years afterwards, Diana had been surprised he hadn’t asked for a divorce. In fact, it was that he hadn’t that led her to understand how much he did love her. Bringing it up again was his way of, well, reminding her what a good sport he was, she supposed.

After that wicked wicked night, the one that was not her fault, she’d sworn off drinking. Yes, she was a flirt. And yes, she did have an itch that seemed to need regular scratching. And no, Callum was not so libidinously inclined as she, so yes, when she was tipsy she could be a target. But how men chose to react to her was not her doing, but theirs. In her view, what they had done to her at that party had in no way been her fault, and she was not going to wear it. Thinking back on it now, in fact, it was Callum who had done the swearing off of her having drinks at his work parties. It had been a rough time for them both so early in their relationship.

Diana leaned back against the door. Years before – before the children even, when they’d first known each other, she’d had drinks at one of Callum’s work parties and he had lost her in the hubbub. Searching for her, he’d noticed a man peering into an enclosed area under a staircase. He was cheering something or someone. Curious, Callum approached and looked over the man’s shoulder. What they were cheering on was wearing a bright yellow dress that had been torn down to her waist. Diana was the only one in a dress of that vibrant yellow and it was she who was being cheered on. She was on her knees. A man in the half dark space – a guest he didn’t recognise, had one hand on her shoulder, the other on the back of her head, driving her face repeatedly into his groin.

The wet slapping and gurgling sounds coming from her took his breath away. The man beside him, cheering on, was unzipped and holding himself, priming himself as though in line for his turn. Callum stepped back and swung at him as hard as he could and watched the man drop to his knees and then fall backwards, his head hitting the concrete floor with an alarming thud.

Under the staircase, nothing was clear, but the man with his hands on Diana had not missed a stroke in spite of the horrid loud thud from Callum’s punch to his friend’s head. The one with Diana was way too far gone to stop now. Callum took hold of the top of the low door frame, primed himself for a charge and delivered a blow to the man’s head that drove him through the plasterboard wall beside him. Something in his face had given way because the sound was of cracking bone – wet and sharp. Diana, left sitting crumpled on the floor, face down, her breasts exposed to the half dozen men and ladies who had gathered around from the racket Callum had made disposing of the two guests.

“What the hell’s going on here Callum? That’s my brother here on the floor under my feet. I think you owe me a bit of an ex….”.

“Fuck of Jim, and take those people away. That’s Diana sitting there in a heap and if that’s your brother there I’ve just knocked out, he was lining up for a piece of her too. Drag him away before I really get upset.”

“Callum?” Diana remembered how small her voice had come out that night. “Please help me Callum,” she remembered crying.

Driving home, after the sobbing had subsided and he’d helped her dress, she told him she had only been talking to that man and then he’d forced her under the stairs and she was scared and didn’t know what to do and she hated him.

And yes, Callum had had questions. Of course he’d had questions. It was supposed to have been a regular work party with regular people – his friends. “So why didn’t you scream?” he’d asked, and then he’d got nasty. “Because your mouth was too full?”

He’d apologised almost immediately, but it was out, what he thought.

“And how long were you watching then before you did something, Callum? Can I ask you some questions too? Did it make you hard, watching? Did you want a piece of me too, like that?”

Yes, he’d had questions, but it hadn’t been the right time and they hadn’t been the right questions. And then whenever afterwards he’d want to talk about it, it always seemed to go bad. It seemed afterwards, that any time he begun to ask, it seemed he was really accusing her or blaming her rather than really wanting to find out what did actually happen. After a while, instead, they ended up just talking about how perhaps drinking was not the right thing for her and that because she was so attractive, she was also vulnerable. That had been it, and they’d left it at that.

Now, like tonight, seeing her even a little tipsy seemed to unnerve him. And tonight too, it was a work party again. Different colleagues, different boss but somehow it was all coming back to him again as the same thing and he was making it all about him again.

Yes, tonight had been a bit messy because she’d snuck her usual one or two drinks in, but on an empty stomach, and with not enough of Kitty’s pills. It wasn’t really her fault. Instead of him getting all worked up about nothing much, she’d much rather he took advantage of her himself, like other men seemed to enjoy doing. After all, a girl did like to be flattered, so how different was she to any other girl?

Diana kicked her pumps away and took aim for the bed. The dark and quiet of the room had made getting her bearings harder. It was like trying to balance drunk with eyes closed. She reached out, feeling her way in the almost pitch dark with her arms and legs probing the darkness for the edge of the bed.

“Oops!” she found the bed with her shins, paused, and let herself fall forwards into the cloud soft mattress. “Mmmm”, and then pulled herself up an up until she found a pillow for her head. She was in heaven, away from the party and Callum and his eyes following her, checking she was ‘alright’. She was dizzy and faint but when she closed her eyes to try and doze off for a bit, she found she was wide awake behind her lids. It felt as though she was staring out from behind them. Damned pills. Not strong enough to party with and too strong to doze off on.

Sleep would not come like this, and maybe that was a good thing. If Callum had to come looking for her – well, it would turn into a lecture again…another boring fucking lecture from Mr Perfect. Anyway, all she needed was to rest until a little until the drink wore off, get back downstairs and have a bit and she’d be fine for the world. In fact, an hour or so and she would be back on Callum’s arm, refreshed and ready to charm the pants off whoever he put her in front of.

“Oops,” she giggled. No! I mustn’t say anything about ‘pants off’, even if I am feeling a bit like everybody should have their pants off. I’m a bad bad girl, that’s what I am. And I’m still clearly too drunk and stoned to be fit company for that stuffy lot downstairs. All stuffy except maybe a couple of them I wouldn’t mind getting dragged into a dark corner with. “Stop it girl. You’re supposed to be getting sober, not getting worse,” she said perhaps a little too aloud, lifting her head off the pillow, checking the room again for any living souls. I mustn’t say or think any things like that. I’m a bad bad girl….and I’m very very bored now.

It was better Diana was up here, alone, in the dark and away from everyone. For the moment anyway. She let her hand slip under her panties and touched herself. She and Callum hadn’t done it for weeks now – he was ‘preoccupied with work Darling….a lot on my plate’ he said, but that didn’t help her and now she was here with some mostly stuffy people but also a couple of keepers too. She was wet and she let her fingers linger, stroking and flicking a little – not too much, or maybe, why not? There was nobody here and chances were that nothing would happen anyway when she and Callum got home because ‘I’ve got a lot on my plate, Darling.’

He shouldn’t say ‘Darling’ if he wasn’t being romantic saying it. The word was losing its meaning – he was demeaning it, and that was mean…..and I’m a little bit smashed.

She rolled over on to her side, her back to the light from the ensuite door. The light, tiny as it was, was irritating and it was too far away to bother doing anything about. She wriggled her toes and sighed lazily, letting her lids fall closed. Nothing. No sounds from downstairs, just a soft hum – probably air conditioning, and her breathing too. She couldn’t hear her inwards breath, but her outwards breath she could. The skin on her thighs felt warm and tingly. The fabric that had fallen between her legs played games with her skin. She put a finger inside herself.

Her mind wandered idly around, where it would, moving over this and that – nothing things…unimportant things…trivia things, until she found her mind wandering upstairs at home, leaning idly at the threshold of her bathroom. She let her breath go and heard it whisper out of her chest. She was awake, yet dreaming. She was lucidly dreaming as she stepped onto the cool tiles. The soft muslin curtains at the window followed her breath - in towards her, then out like sails on a perfectly becalmed day. One of those blue sky days when the world is simply perfection.

She stepped another step forward and found a new cool place on the tiles. There, against the wall, pressed hard against it was she, and someone was pressing his forearm hard against her throat. She can’t see his face but her face is turned towards where the muslin curtains float in and out with the almost still air of the day and they look at each other – she, in her mind, is looking at herself looking back at her. There is no fear in her face. Instead it is flushed and her eyes are glassy, her mouth open slightly, slack – not caring, but sharing her moment with Diana. She is breathing in time with herself – in breath together; out breath together. She feels hot now just like the version of her in the bathroom is hot in the face.

The pills – Kitty’s pills, and the alcohol, and the not eating… the wandering mind…the hallucinations coming and going, she knew what they were from and she liked them… She opened her eyes. Everything was still quiet as a cloud. Nothing of the party downstairs was breaking through. She had her bearings and closed her eyes. Back to the bathroom, in her home – to what was happening there.

In a moment she was back there – cool tiles under her feet. A movement suddenly and she watched a blouse torn open. More skin, and then the brassiere ripped off leaving breasts exposed….they were small – hers were small.

Diana’s chest heaved in and out, in unison the woman, herself, she was watching. The brute’s heavy forearm pressed hard against her chest, pinning her, almost lifting her up the wall. His other arm, reaching down low, searching, searching, then, like a piston, driving up and down, quickening, thrusting harder and harder. Her chest lay open and red, her mouth slack, open, eyes locked onto Diana’s.

Diana pulled her knees up high and close to her chest. Her right hand grasped for her hem, pulling it up roughly. She reached down behind her, slipping her hand into her briefs, pushing them down and away from her swollen self. She pulled apart her cheeks until she was open. All she was now was matted dampness down there and then it stopped. She stopped, eyes open wide.

It was a click – metal on metal. It was the door. She closed her mouth to quiet her breathing and tugged up her briefs. A second click and then brief wash of sound – people chattering, laughing, a moment of light and then darkness and quiet again.

She listened hard, her own breathing in her ears, constrained – holding back. Someone had come in – they were in the room.

The rough breathing told her it was a man. Another moment of silence and then the sound of footfalls on the carpet, brushing over it softly…tentatively. It would be black for him as it had been black for her. He would be able to see nothing, as she’d seen nothing in the darkness.

An eternity and then a bump at the edge of the bed. She lay still, her eyes open wide, staring at the wall to her side of the bed. His shadow barely made out on the wall, silhouetted from the faint light from the ensuite. Another bump, heavier this time. His weight, sitting on the edge of the bed caused her to roll a little towards him.

“Fuck! Fuck it!” in a rough voice.

He moved slightly and then fell heavily backwards towards the centre of the bed. A heavy sweet aroma reached her, thick like molasses, sweet like rum. It was the smell of the dark rum her father had on him when, every night he would drink it. His rum and his newspaper. She wondered how old the man was who was sharing her bed. It was not a drink that men she knew, drank.

The bed moved again and with a groan, whoever it was on the bed, rolled over and she felt the dead weight of some part of his body fall onto her leg. She lay still, eyes closed tight so that she could focus her attention. She could hear her own restricted breathing and her heart pounding in her chest. The man was still. Perhaps he was so drunk that he was falling asleep. She would wait, and when his breathing steadied, she would slip away unnoticed.

Waiting, Diana thought back to the party. Which one of the men there tonight could it be? Suddenly she shuddered at the thought of Callum discovering her, again, compromised like this.

Did he just touch her? It was light and it was on her calf. She thought about her perfume wafting around. Perhaps it was no more than the random movement of a drunk.

There was one man down at the party. The tall one – the heavy set man. He was a possibility. Then there was…. There! Again. She felt a touch on her calf. It was light but this time a little more prolonged. Her shoulders tightened and she pressed her elbows against her sides. He was awake. He was awake and he’d found her.

She lay still as could be. If he thought she was asleep, perhaps he would be decent enough to leave her alone. She was not afraid but under her breath she was repeating, ‘please, please, please,’ as though the mantra might cause to happen what she hoped would.

Waiting. Waiting. Nothing since the last touch. Was it one minute, or five? There was no way to tell how time was travelling. The smell of the rum was less than it was at first, but behind it she smelled something else – a scent that she knew. It was woody, reminding her of forests and trails for some reason, even though she’d never hiked. It was something she’d liked, but not for Callum. She knew this scent.

She felt the movement again, but this time it was more assertive, as though perhaps he was testing the waters.

Diana was not afraid. There was nothing really to be afraid of. This situation was not a life or death situation. She had come here, into this room, bidden by Callum and their host. If this turned into a predicament it would be nobody’s fault except the drunk laying on the bed with her. She wasn’t saying that anything was going to happen, but if it did, and she was still more than a little wet from that itch that needed scratching, he would have to force her and she would resist and she would be without fault.

Inside, she laughed. She was glad. In this respect, she was glad she was a woman.

That night of Callum’s work party years ago, yes, she had flirted, and yes, she had followed those two men down that hallway and yes, down some stairs into a place where there had been nobody about. But that didn’t mean that she’d been asking for what she got. She was simply a vivacious, gregarious girl and she was responsible only for her way of being who she was and not how that was interpreted.

Callum hadn’t bought it though. She’d been able to tell from the questions he’d asked after those men had assaulted her and the expression on his face was that he took it to not be all their fault. Callum was protecting his gender instead of her. The two that had got hold of her were bastards and Callum had behaved like one too.

In any case, tonight she was in a safe place, laying down in a room she’d been directed to by the wife of the host of the party and by Callum himself. And she could make this stop – this thing that was starting to happen now with this drunk, and she would, but for Callum’s sake, and the host’s, it would be better if it didn’t get awkward or embarrassing or God forgive, loud. Inside, she giggled – After all, I have a duty to them beyond my self-interest, haven’t I?

Was she making too much of it? This man, on the bed with her, had simply had too much to drink, like her. No, this was nothing, and nothing needed to be made of it. This was two people who in fact very probably knew each other who were simply recovering from too much good cheer. Colleagues in fact, that’s what they were – colleagues in law, anyway.

A squeeze this time caught her by surprise. And then his hand moved from the outside of her calf to between her two calves. She clenched her knees together. This needed to stop – it should stop, shouldn’t it? Did it need to stop now or would doing so cause an embarrassing scene. She could stop it anytime she wanted but there was no point embarrassing people for no reason, especially Callum and the host.

“Shhhhh,” he said from in the dark.

It was his first real sign that he was aware of her. She felt his strength as he twisted his hand where she had caught hold of it, trying to prise her knees apart. Without the strength to hold on, she eased her grip and with that, he, his. The bed rocked as he moved up the bed, stopping when he was behind her. His breath was warm in her neck as pressed in close. She said nothing, but her heart felt as though it was beating its way out through her chest. Her mouth, open a little, made her breath dry and raspy.

Her eyes closed, Diana said nothing – not a whisper. If she did not know who he was, he might not know who she was. She licked at her lips, dry from her breath and keeping the silence and the tension. This was not her fault. He was doing this. He was being the animal – the brute with her.

She felt a firm push under her left shoulder and then a hand finding its way under and around her until it stopped at her breast, cupping it – squeezing it – releasing it. She let out a gasp, but nothing more. Her legs, tired already from holding her knees close, gave way as he lifted her right leg up. She was open and exposed and felt the cool night air on her thighs. His fingers – rough like someone who worked with tools, began tracing lines from her knees up along her thighs. Diana tensed her thighs. He was in a hurry. He was a blunt tool. He was not timid.

“Shhhhh,” he whispered again softly into her ear. “Shhhh.”

Diana reached behind with her free arm. His belly was hard as she tried to push him back away from her, but he was strong and the sudden shock of feeling his fingers inside her, took her breath away. She felt how open she was and she could hear how wet she was. She held back a cry, her throat thick now as she felt a wave of shame come over her, but there was something about that shame…. It should have made her feel bad but she opened herself wider to him.

“Please – I don’t want it like this,” her voice as small as she could make it, trailed off. I fought him off and I did my duty. It was him doing this, and she was fighting it but she could fight no more and her hand fell from exhaustion behind her, between the two of them. His hips were thrusting and defending herself, she felt how hard and big he was. It was out – he must have taken it out. He was like an animal, rutting. She took his shaft in her hand and she finished him off like that until there was a pool of it, wet and thick in her hand. He grunted when he finished. It was the sound a big strong man would make.

For minutes – how many, she did not know, he lay there until his breathing steadied. He said nothing all the while. She felt him put himself away before sliding quietly off the bed. He had not even taken off his shoes. She heard him at the door – the click of the latch, his voice, softly, “Nothing happened here–nothing!” and then the sounds of the party, the light and then silence and darkness again.

In the bathroom, she looked in the mirror. Her makeup was all there where it should have been. How, she didn’t know? Reaching behind her she felt around the back of her dress. It was dry. She had caught it all in her hand. She pressed her hands against her stomach holding back the tears. They weren’t of grief or regret but of tension released. Her mouth was parched.

Should she should have fought harder? Fought for Callum … for them both? She dampened a washer and wiped herself clean and dry where he had touched her. Looking in the mirror, she smiled back at herself. It had not been her, it had been him. He forced himself on her. If she had screamed it would have ruined everything for Callum tonight. Everyone won tonight and downstairs, there was a party waiting for her.

As she dropped her lipstick back in her purse, she saw a couple of small green somethings tucked into a corner. Thank you Kitty, and hello party as she washed them down with a tumbler of water.

As she made her way back towards the door, she felt something hard with her foot. It was a pen. A heavy pen, and thick. She flicked the light on to examine it. It was gold and it was a fountain pen. On it, engraved, was a bird – a phoenix. Below the phoenix were engraved some numbers that looked like a birth date. Diana slipped it into her purse. An interesting souvenir, and if an arrogant bastard wanted it back he’d have to show himself and then, she’d be more than happy to return it.

Diana shut the door behind her and smiled. I am she who is without fault – I am faultless and it’s all so wonderful.

Over the handrail she could see the party downstairs was still in full flight and in not too many minutes, thanks to Kitty, so would she be. Tonight, she would be at her very very best.

End

Other Amazon Titles Published By

William Abeleven

Australian Prisons - A Survival Guide For New Inmates - by Bill Bergman

How To Disappear Online – Version 2014 – by Bill Bergman

Always Without Malice - by William Abeleven

Intermittent Fasting + PALEO – All the latest facts and figures on this new approach to sustainable and permanent weight loss – by Natasha Petkovic

The Paleo Diet - The Essential Snapshot For Pregnant Women And Babies - by Natasha Petkovic

Paleo Go – Cycle Pro - The Ultimate High Performance Diet Guide For Amateur And Professional Cyclists – by

Paleo Pro Runner – the ultimate high performance diet bible for today’s professional and amateur runner – by Natasha Petkovic

Paleo Slims – Bust Those Baby Body Blues Today! - By Natasha Petkovic

Mindfulness For Daily Life - Your 7 Day Program - by Cristin Ricci

Deepest Meditation! Seven Days To Peace - by Cristin Ricci

Sweet Lead Guitar …in a snap! Never hit a bad note again - by Jimmy Lentz

Jimmy’s Guitar String Bible - by Jimmy Lentz

Nicotine Causes Weight Loss - by Martin Cross-Wilkes

Super Brain Supplement - by Martin Cross-Wilkes

The Shy Girl’s Guide To Dating - by Penny Lane.

Teach Your Bird To Talk In Your Own Voice - by Irwin Thomas

Nasi Goreng - Indonesian Recipes Straight From My Kitchen To You - by Jan Fritz Abeleven

The Concierge – by Lea Carrol

Initiation – by Lea Carrol

Love a la Brute – by Lea Carrol

Faultless – by Lea Carrol

All Author Contacts

via

williamabeleven@hotmail.com

Before you go, I’d like to say thank you for purchasing one of my Author’s books.

I know you could have chosen from dozens of books on Kindle Publishing, but you chose one of my Authors, so, again, a big thank you for downloading my books and reading all the way to the end.

I’d like to ask a small favour. Could you please take a minute or so and leave a review for this book on Amazon.

Your feedback will help me continue to publish the kind of books that people enjoy and request.